March 04: Resisting God

Day 4

View Video Transcript

Have you ever wanted something for somebody more than they wanted it for themselves? It’s really the classic dilemma of a parent.

I think as parents, we want good things for our kids. And very often, we want good things for them more than they even want them for themselves.

I think it’s the classic dilemma of any type of leader. I think it’s the classic dilemma of any type of coach or mentor.

We fall into this idea of wanting something for somebody else more than they want it for themselves.

At my consulting company, we’ve got all these coaches. We’ve got life coaches. We’ve got business coaches. We’ve got executive coaches. And one of the things I’m constantly trying to say to the coaches is, one of the biggest challenges you’re going to have is that you’re going to see what is possible in people, and you are going to want what is possible more than the people themselves.

Of course as a coach, as a parent, as a leader, as a mentor, you can cross a line where you get too involved, where you start to do things for them rather than empowering them to do those things for themselves.

This emotion we feel, this dilemma we experience, is Godlike. It’s what God experiences every day with you and me.

He sees what’s possible, and then he sees who we are and the lives we’re living.

He sees what’s possible in you. He sees what’s possible with your life. And most of the time, he wants it more for you and me than we want it for ourselves.

That’s the great parental frustration, and it’s one of God’s great frustrations. It’s that he wants things for us more than we want them for ourselves. He wants you to become the-best-version-of-yourself more than you even want it for yourself. He wants heaven for you more than you even want heaven for yourself. But he never crosses that line.

That’s free will, and that’s an incredible love. There’s an incredible love in that free will not to cross that line.

There are a thousand lessons in all of this for us, but let’s focus on this one today: Let’s ask God to give us the desire for goodness, the desire for being the-best-version-of-ourselves, the desire for heaven, the desire that for everything that’s good, right, noble, and just, to fill us with that desire, to help us to desire it as much as he desires it for us. To help us see the possibilities the way he sees the possibilities.

“God wants you to be happy even more than you want it yourself.”

Matthew Kelly, Resisting Happiness

Share this quote.

Focus

When we resist God we resist happiness.

Act

Learn to recognize when you want something for others more than they want it for themselves.

Pray

Jesus, I cannot imagine the happiness you desire for me. Help me to embrace your dream for my life.

Today’s personal reflection features Dynamic Catholic team member Dominick Albano. Dominick is our RCIA team leader and comes to us from Rockford, Illinois. Dominick met Pope Benedict XVI on his honeymoon, was a stay-at-home dad for five years, and once scored eight goals in a pee-wee hockey game.

Have you ever wanted something good for someone more than they wanted it for themselves?

Let us know in the comments!

We encourage you to comment on this reflection. All viewpoints are welcome, but we ask that you remain on-topic and respect other members of the discussion. Please remember that we are trying to help each other become the-best-version-of-ourselves. We reserve the right to make editorial decisions regarding comments, including but not limited to removal of comments. Be Bold. Be Catholic.®

  • Pearl Brown

    My daughter is expecting and the father is not too happy therefore my daughter is feeling down. I want her to see this pregnancy as a gift from God and too be happy and feel good about it and herself. I’m going to pray for this and ask God to turn it around

    • Newtown Maria

      Pearl, I was a mother at age 17. At the time, I was scared, uncertain, and anxious. From the love of my family, I kept my baby. Danielle is now 37 years old, and I graduated from college as a dental hygienist. SHE, is the best thing that ever happened to me!!! By the way, Danielle just gave me my first grandson!!❤😇

      • John Gebhardt

        My wife and I have are first grandchild as of December 21st 2016. A blessing from God

  • Elisa Stevens

    With three children, I see potential in them that they are not ready to recognize. Today’s discussion was a great reminder of how God feels about me – His child!

  • Anita

    Yeah, for my brother to be a Christian… My dad and I have talked about this, about what good qualities my brother has and how those could be magnified if he turned to God. My brother has told me he’s atheist, hasn’t told our parents, but has told me. We were raised in church and taught to love God, but he’s closed the door on all that. He has so much more potential, if he would just reach out to God. Please pray for my brother.

    • Irma Torres

      Hi Anita, I will pray for your brother that God will transform his heart and open his eyes.

      • Anita

        Thank you Irma, he definitely needs prayer.

    • Sarah

      Anita, see if your brother will watch the movie God’s Not Dead. It is about an atheist and why he is an atheist.

      • Anita

        Ah! Hadn’t thought of that. Great idea! Thank you.

    • Andrea

      Please pray for my 18 year old son who argues about there being no God. I have been battling inside and carrying a heavy heart this past year. I too have felt like a failure but as I listen to Matthew Kelly and read these post I feel comfort. Thank you for your post and your prayers🙏🏻

      • Billy Lindsey

        God molds each and everyone of us in a different way continue praying for all that don’t believe or strays away. When a person becomes reborn again it sometimes is much greater. GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME AND ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD.
        – God Bless

        • Fanny

          Bill, I so agree with your way of thinking! I include all those in need of conversion. Love and light.

        • J Phon

          My children and I exchange the “God is good…” sentiment almost everyday as I send them off to school. In this way I’m trying to encourage them to take God with them wherever they go. This is a small way of me wanting good for them. May God walk with them everyday.

      • Chad Meyers

        #1 pray. If it is just the simple existence of God he denies, try looking into some of the materials (free videos too) by Living Waters & Answers in Genesis. They are not Catholic, but that should not matter. (they preach the basics, Jesus is salvation) They take a very Scientific approach to the existence of God. I really enjoy it.

        • Jeff P

          God is a god of the impossible – Prayer moves people and mountains – I like it Chad – Let’s all pray for the goodness in ourselves and others to shine like the sun everyday. We can do this – together

          • Elizabeth Brumann

            I agree that good is the god of the impossible and that prayer moves the people and the mountains and it conquers all challenges and situations because god is there to help and to listen to you and all your problems and troubles and to ease the burden and the load of your particular problem or situation and god does not judge you or condemn you because god is kind and merciful and is here to forgive for everything that you have done and to release from all of your shortcomings and mistakes from the past to now. God forgives the past and helps to avoid mistakes and sins in the future. God understands you problems. conditions and situations. God is a forgiving and patient and is slow to anger and is quick to kindness compassion and mercy. He is hear to guide us on the journey to eternal life and to help us make it up to heaven he is our father who is up in heaven to guide us and to teach us about the meaning of life and to accept our challenges and disabilities such as having a learning disability with ADD and arthritsis and he is hear to help me get through with grace courage strength and dignity courage and he is hear to help me make the right choices and to do what is right for me and what is in my best interest to lead me and to guide me down the right path. God helps those who want to help themselves and do things for themselves. God does not judge anyone he accepts his people for who they are and he loves and welcomes everyone because he created everyone to be equal and god does not have favorites he loves all of his people with no conditions attached he just wants the best for his people.

            He gives his people the strength to accept all of their limitations strengths and weaknesses and their disabilities and conditions such as me having arthritsis and leg cramps along with my other conditions and he is hear to guide through the condition and to help navigate my way through this condition and to help me to take care of myself and to help myself and to help gain understanding into the condition. He does not want me to be afraid or ashamed of the condition he just wants me to accept the condition with arms wide and to have an open minded and to just take care of myself and to worry about every pain that I get and just to work on recovery and improvement and to make life better and easier for myself.

            God is hear to me out in my time of need and to lead me down the right path and to help me with all of my conditions and he loves me for me. God is the most important person in my life and he leads me and guides me along the way and to help me to accomplish all of my goals and objectives that I have set out for myself to accomplish and just to be happy at whatever I choose to do with the rest of my life. I accept the learning disability with ADD and the arthritsis and the leg cramps and all of my other conditions. God forgives me for the past and he releases me from the past. I forgive myself for the past and I release myself from the entire past and I surrender my whole entire past to god. I release myself of all the burdens of my past. I let everything go. I surrender my life to god.

            I embrace a new start and beginning to my life. I let go of all the people who hurt me or abused me in my past. I let go of Andrew, Chris, Sara, Sean, and Tara and grandpa brumann and I forgive for everything that he had said to me in the past. I forgive myself for the past and absolve myself of the past and erase from my memory forever. It is not my fault that I have arthritsis and leg cramps. I see the good and all of the possibilities in life not the negatives I see mercy, compassion understanding sympathy, forgiveness reconciliation and peace. I see strength determination courage and bravery. Lent is a time to prepare ourselves for the resurrection of Jesus at Easter and to make way a path for the Lord. He is our strength our light and our salvation. Lent is a 40 day spiritual journey through the desert and Easter is our exit from the desert to enjoy eternal life and salvation with Jesus. Lent is time for fasting, almsgiving and prayer and to watch the mass on television and to go to a church mass and to prayer and meditate on the mysteries of Jesus and to pray the rosary and to read the Bible and to follow the mass in the magnifcant and reflect on the teaching and the message of Jesus and to gain a better understanding and insight into who god and Jesus are to us. It is time to make us better people and to open our hearts to the Lord Jesus Christ and to make God a part of our lives.

      • KerSti

        My priest wrote about St. Monica and I related her trouble to this situation with my own teenage son. Try praying to her and you will find hope.

      • Dayna Kirkpatrick

        In time your son will come around and love God again. My son after his dad died hated god and was so mad at God that he took his dad away from him and myself. My son was only 14 when his dad died of cancer. There were a lot of ups and downs but I can say now that my son in in college and thanks to God he has finally gone back to church again. So give your son time but if you have taught him how important god is he will turn himself around.

      • Clara Turci Depko

        My children were not talking for years and I prayed for healing in the family. It was hard since I could not have family gathering. In the last few months everything has changed and healings have happened. A mothers prayers a strong never give up there is a saint I believed who prayed for years for the same thing for her son he became a saint. The power of a mothers prayers.

        • Ana

          Yes, I love St. Monica. She never gave up on her son Augustine. Our Blessed Morher is a powerful intercesor. As hard as it is, we must surrender and let God do His thing. His timing is always right. We must just persevere on our prayers.

          • Sue Stack

            I love the simple phrase “His timing is always right” Thank you !

          • Jessica Vaughn

            “We must persevere on our prayers.” Beautifully said. Reminding myself it’s all in God’s timing and not mine is something I struggle with daily. I also struggle with this topic post daily as I’m a very type A and not necessarily the most patient person (again, it’s not my timing, I know). I’m working on it with God daily. We put our son through 12 years of Catholic school, which was a major financial sacrifice for our family, but well worth it as he received both academic and athletic scholarships to a great private Christian college. He went one semester and let it all go to waste and no works for a pizza joint and no longer goes to any school. He will be 20 this month. He has no direction or purpose in life. He’s ridiculously smart but not driven at all. I cannot provide that drive and motivation. He has to want it for himself. I pray for him daily and I have faith that God will help him find his path, I just pray it’s sooner rather than later, but again…not my timing. But this, his future, him to return to school, find his motivation and self again…I want that for him more he wants it for himself.

          • Kathy

            Our son, who is turning 36 in a few days, seems to have no motivation to better himself, which is so frustrating as a parent. We are so thankful that he does go to Church every week but is living with a lady now. She has never gone to a church, and after 3 years she has started to go with him, which he is very happy about. We have encouraged them to get married but do not get anywhere. One problem is, they have very little income, but, our son has no motivation to look for anything better. He has an incredible work ethic and the thrift store he manages would be in a world of hurt without him. Yet they abuse his loyalty to the limit. The frustration is great but We know that we have to let go and give them up to God. Please pray for them.

          • Jane

            How do you know that his work in the Thrift Store is what God wants for him? If it makes him happy, that should be enough, shouldn’t it??? I face those questions all the time…what does God really want us to do?

          • Jenny S

            I was thinking the same thing as Jane (in response to Kathy). Maybe your son is personally satisfied and happy with his job at the thrift store. He may very well be capable of getting a higher paying job, with a better company, and a more prestigious job title, but maybe he would not find as much internal satisfaction. (I have no idea if that is the case, but it might be a possibility).

          • Michelle S.

            “For this is the will of God, your sanctification…” (1 Thessalonians 4:3) God’s will is for us to become holy, to become like Him. I struggled trying to figure out what God wanted me to do with my life, then I read this verse and the struggle disappeared. It doesn’t matter what you do in life, God will use you where you are. What matters is how much you love God and all of his people. I hope this helps you as well.

          • Catherine

            My Husband has always worked in retail. For a short time he became the buyer for a large retail chain and during that time he started to have seizures. The only diagnoses the Doctors could come up with after 3 years of testing was they were stress related. So he went back to a retail job, and within 6 months the seizures stopped. My husband needed to be in retail but for a long time I did not know why. Today as I read some of the e-mails he has received from past employees he has worked with and managed I know why. They are all glowing reports about how my husband saved, or encouraged or simply supported others on there journeys in life. A lot of these people are in jobs they now love to do and are much happier and more productive. God will always put us exactly where we need to be.

          • Kathryn Duncan

            This must be heart-breaking for you. But since choices have consequences (the Bible says we reap what we sow), he will probably come to a point of frustration in not being able to do what he would like because of his limited situation and it may be a “wake up call” for him. Sometimes God has to get our attention so we start listening to him again.

            Blessings to you

          • Joyce Lamb

            Yes, Blessed are they who wait for the Lord. It encourages our trust. The very process of waiting for Him is beneficial. It keeps our soul on tiptoe, as you look up to Him in hope. You acknowledge that He is in control, and you rest in His goodness. Jesus, we trust in you.

          • Paula Hecker

            Abraham is a prime example of waiting on the Lord! His story puts patience in perspective!

          • Connie Bland

            AMEN!

          • Ana

            Look up the Surrender Novena. I am a control freak. I want things when I want them and the way I want them. Through struggles, I have learned that true happiness can only be found when we let go and we let God do His holy will. His plan is perfect and mine is not. Ask for the grace to be able to totally surrender everything to Him! It is only then that we experience peace as we wait!

          • Jessie

            Totally agree with you Ana. Only in doing His Will can we find the true happiness & inner peace that come from Him alone. I love Mother Teresa’s words – “Holiness does not consist in doing extraordinary things. It consists in accepting, with a smile, what Jesus sends us. It consists in accepting and following the will of God.”

          • Connie Bland

            I also agree. I don’t think I’ve been as happy and at peace since the day I have left everything in God’s hands. He knows better than us, God’s Will Be Done

          • Kt

            Jessica,
            It sounds like you are doing a great job as a parent, having given your son a strong foundation in Catholicism and raising him in an environment where religion, academics, hard work, and family are valued. Have faith that God is providing lessons during this unwelcomed “detour.” Having been a Catholic school principal as well as a sibling of others who detoured for years, I have seen many youth stray way off track but then find their way back to God, back to the Church, and even back to Catholic schools with their own children one day. So you are right, it’s all in God’s timing, not ours. I will keep you and your son in my prayers!

          • Renee

            My 3 were raised and have so strayed. I know they will ‘ll be back. I pray for continued safety in all they duo until they come back in full communion.

          • Toni Shea

            Well said Jessica.
            God Bless
            Thoughts and Prayers

          • Elephant

            Jessica, I am struggling with a decision our son has made and it has taken him away from God, the Church and all he was taught. He too went to Catholic School, participated in the Mass and went to Church every week even through College. He now says the Catholic Church does not accept him. I was torn beyond belief, until I prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet for him. It gave me such a peace that I am able to deal with this more easily. Still cry when I think of it and my heart is broken, but I know God is in control and He will bring him out of this and back into His loving arms. I do pray for him daily, sometimes hourly. We just have to believe. And yes, St. Monica is a beautiful example for us.

          • Stacy

            As an adult, I’m always amazed when I think back on my path to the place I’m in now. Both professionally and spiritually. My family often comments on it as well. In my case, there were “roadblocks” to success (divorced parents that struggled financially, unstable home with absent (addicted) father, etc.). However, I was called by God to pursue my education and to leave behind a lifestyle that was going to set me up for failure. I heard the call. I had no doubt what God wanted for my life and he carried me through 8 years of college, including Veterinary School. Your child has to follow the path they feel called to. Prayers, love and faith will support him on his way. He’s still so young. I bet that before too long he will find his way to meaning and pursue the purpose God has set in his heart.

          • Jill

            Have you read the book “No Turning Back” by Donald Calloway? Amazing story of a son who struggled with so much and was so far away from God. It is his story of conversion into Catholicism and he is now a priest and amazing author. His story is a testament about the power of God and gives so much hope. He is the author of many books including Champions of the Rosary.

          • Genny

            When I look around at relatives and see separation among siblings my heart shrinks, I do not want that in my family…I always have told my children by sticking together you are stronger, you can help each other..I always pray to mother Mary for those siblings that are lost…for their conversion, only in God’s time!

          • Jessica Vaughn

            I have not but I most certainly will, it sounds wonderful. Thanks so much for the recommendation!

          • Chriss Esser

            I can totally relate to you. Our almost 23 year old is so smart, was a valedictori6in in high school and has floundered in college. He no longer attends church and has taken time off school (hes about 1.5 years away from finishing his degree). He has a good job right now but it is temporary. My husband and I pray daily that he will find his way (finish school and return to church). It is so hard when you want something more than they do! Keep the faith! They aare still Gods children!

          • Renee

            Mine is also23and lost. Praying he finds his way. He went to school only1.5 years. Works retail. I pray he will find his way. He is kind and loving.

          • Chriss Esser

            Renee, love him right where he is and remember he is God’s child and our plan is not necesaarily His plan. Hardest thing as a parent is to watch gour child flounder but I keep turning back to God and turning it over to Him. Doing studies like this one continue to reinforce that for me. God wants the best for your child!

          • Renee

            I pray for mine as well. He is3years older than yours but still lost. He has carried a job for3 years and for that im grateful.

          • Cat

            Hi, Jessica! This is so hard. I went to college for almost 4 years. Unfortunately, at least two years of that time, I was suffering from depression. My transcripts from my last two years show most of my passing grades being in choir. I went through a occupational rehabilitation program and took some classes that I paid for without financial aid or parental help trying to not let my parents down, but in the end, they did want it more than I wanted it for myself. I wish I could tell you that I righted myself academically and went back for my degree, but the truth is that I think that what I got is better. I am married now with 4 beautiful and gifted kids ages 11, 9, 5, and my 1yo who is snuggling with me as I type. It is totally not where I had set out for or what I (or my parents) had dreamed for me, but it is beautiful. Keep praying God’s will for your son. Whether it be school, starting his own business, a fabulous new job that uses his gifts, or something that we haven’t thought of altogether, God will make it something beautiful. God bless!

          • Mary

            Hi Jessica. Your post hit home — my home. My son is 25 and same thing — smart, received a full ride in honors college, has also been given the gift of painting. But he gave it all up and got through one semister — was put on academic probation. We found out he hardly went to classes. We went through all of it, including counseling, etc. At 25, not much has changed, he is a waiter, works hard long hours, goes out drinking afterwards to wind down he says and it has been a nightmare for my family. His older brother isn’t even speaking to him. Our other two children aren’t too pleased with what he has and continues to do to our family. It’s a mess. I need not go on. He is a loving and forgiving soul though despite his bad choices and not living up to his potential and happiness. He doesn’t know who he is. He is gay, too, by the way. I hold on to hope. That’s all we have to hold on too, and we feel blessed for that grace. Reading through these posts, we are not alone either! But sometimes don’t you feel like you are? That’s what I struggle with and turn to prayer every day. I surrender him over to God, and find myself taking him right on back and it’s been a yo-yo of emotional strain. When I pray for my son, I now will pray for your son too, and all here who are struggling with their children. Thank you for sharing your story. Let’s hold on to the promises of Christ, and trust in Him. God bless you Jessica.

          • Jessica Vaughn

            I will certainly pray for your son as well. One book that was given to me by a good friend, that has helped me quite a bit is “The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children” by Stormie Omartian. It caters specifically to scripture and prayers pertaining to struggling or lost adult children.

          • Paula Hecker

            We must storm heaven with our prayers for them, and beg God for the grace to be patient waiting for them!

          • Patricia Brady

            This is so true! Thank you for reminding me of this!

          • Sherry Hayes-Peirce

            I am not a parent, but have always admired St. Monica for her prayer perseverance and unfailing belief that God would call her son to him and then use him to grow our Holy Catholic Church.

        • Suzzz

          Clara, I am in that situation now. Your posting give me hope! Thanks you for sharing

        • SJones7208

          Being one of those children who kept my distance from my sister, I completely understand your pain and have recently decided to let things go with my sister…for my parents sake as well as my own sake. I know it was my parents continual prayers that led me to my new found freedom from the resistance in my heart.

        • Joan

          Thank you, Clara, for your encouragement. I also have a chism in my family, and I pray for healing. I was starting to lose hope. I now know I should never give up. God bless you and your family.

        • Steffen

          St. Monica.

          • Yvette Lovell-Biggs

            Thank you for sharing this. My son has estranged himself from the family for the last few years. It has been very difficult to daily surrender him over to God and let Him handle how and when my prodigal will return. Hearing stories like yours gives me hope.

          • Beth Kovalcik

            Been there Yvette. Will pray for you and your son 🙏

          • Yvette Lovell-Biggs

            Thank you! 💜

          • Jessica Vaughn

            I have been reading “The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children” by Stormie Omartian, it’s great and it offers scripture and prayers specific to struggling young adult children.

        • Donna Ierardi

          St. Monica for her son Augustine who himself became one of the greatest saints of all time.

          • Donna Ierardi

            Please watch the movie. It’s excellent

          • eliana

            what is the name of the movie and where did you get it.? thanks

          • Robin

            I have the movie Restless Heart – The Confessions of Augustine, from Ignatius Press. It is available online, although I got mine from a St. Luke’s Productions play.

          • eliana

            thank you very much. God bless

          • Donna Ierardi

            Yes as Robin noted below it is called Restless Heart from Ignatius press I got mine online

          • Robin

            The movie I have is Restless Heart – The Confessions of Augustine. It is from Ignatius Press. It’s available online, although I got mine from a St. Luke’s Productions play.

        • Gerrie

          This gives me much hope. My family too needs healing and I pray for it all the time. Things are getting a little better but we have a long way to go.

        • Frances Dettling Pullin

          OMGosh! This is our family all over! So far we’ve had 3 Christmases and one more to go because of family members will not come if another one is going to be there. I’ve been fasting from deserts (sweets) since way before Lent. I will not have any until all three of our children come back to the Church and our family is reconciled. Fasting and Prayer! Don’t misunderstand, I’m not bragging or complaining. I’m just following Drew Mariani’s prescription. Fasting works!

        • Zoila Valdez

          Yes it was St.Monica , her son was wild and crazy and had lost his Faith… then he became ST Augustin ! real hope for us Mom’s when our kids have lost their Faith PRAY PRAY PRAY and then get on your knees and Pray! sometimes I forget how POWERFUL PRAYER is!

          • Clara Turci Depko

            Years ago when my children were in their teens I would say to my husband, who was not a prayer, give me your hand and I need to pray for our children. I believed that what God had said when two are gathered in prayer. This one day I said give me to hand as always he really did not want to and I toke it and said God protect our daughter who just walked out of the house mad. Within minutes the phone ran our daughter was in an accident. She went through a red light hit another car and the light pole fell landed on the sun roof. When we got there the EMT’s could not get over no one was hurt, or had a scratch. Now that was the power of a Mother’s prayer protect my daughter simple but strong. We have a strong power within us and that is the power that can move those mountains. Keep praying. Now when there is a need I like to ask God your will. I don’t always know the best fix but trust he does.

      • Clara Turci Depko

        Let me share this little story with you our pastor comes from a family whose father does not believe in God. I think God has a sense of humor.

      • Maura Daly Lundstrom

        I feel your burden and carry the same one. My twenty year old son has turned away from church. He doesn’t necessarily deny God, but keeps saying he doesn’t believe what I believe. He doesn’t attend any church and thinks that as long as he is spiritual, that is enough. I often feel such guilt, wondering where I went wrong. How did he turn down this path when I tried so hard to show him God in his life. I wonder if this is just the laziness of a young person and when he grows up a little more he will realize how much he needs God in his life. I will pray for your son when I pray for mine in my daily rosary. I have faith that they can both return to God. God bless and take care!!!!

        • Lydia

          Your words could have been mine, I too feel like a failure. I’m crying as I feel your pain. I will add your son to my daily rosary, and I will never give up hope that they will come back to God through the Eucharist.

        • Becky E

          I listen to Dr. Ray Guarendi on EWTN radio. (love him!). He says the pull from the secular world today is so strong, stronger than the influence of the child’s own family. I see this with my five kids. I’m right there with you. Keep praying like St. Monica prayed for St. Augustine!! I will pray for you and for all of our kids!

          • Renee

            Please pray for my 3.

        • P Sainz

          I think our adult children may have turned away from organized religion, but they are many times still very spiritual. They often are involved in community and spiritualality in ways we don’t see as traditional. It can be something as normal as being involved with friends through workouts, political action, even microbreweries! I watched something on television about this last night at the end of a PBS News Hour show. It really opened my eyes.

          • Helen

            I agree with P Sainz that our children can still be good, moral people tho
            They have turned away from organized religion. But I know that my strong
            Belief in God helps me through the difficult times in life and like St. MOnica
            I will continue praying that The Holy Spirit will call them back.

        • Mary Lichlyter

          Please keep in mind that the pull of culture is very, very strong – and, to the current culture, “spirituality” is the way to go. What this “spirituality” is, only the person decides. It could even be just a vague feeling. Of course, that makes what one “believes” very subjective, but subjectivity is a big part of what’s taught. It’s hard for people to go against the flow. Don’t give up. Keep on praying, minister to your boy (even if it’s as you would minister to a friend or stranger), be available for him, and pray without ceasing! We mamas can try to show our children the way, but only God can take them there.

          • Heidi

            Love your words…”we mamas can try to show the way but only God can take them there” Good reminder. Our children are God’s children too – thank God! 😀

          • Mary Mello

            “We mamas can try to show our children the way, but only God can take them there.” I love this line. GOD himself has shown us the way and yet he gives us the freedom to choose Him or not. Pray without ceasing for our families and friends who need and yet have not found a deep relationship with the Lord God. May I also add that as a Grandmother I have also heard privately, from some of my family members, that they wish they had as much faith as they see in others. I tell them this GIFT of Faith is theirs for the asking.

          • Kathryn Duncan

            So very true, and this generation of millennials are embracing subjective feelings rather than objective truth. If it seems right or feels right then they go with it. That is why it is so important that our children internalize their faith and live the lives God wants for them

          • JJ

            Thank you, Mary, for that last line: “We mamas can try to show our children the way, but only God can take them there.” Like many parents with a child in the throes of the teen years, I struggle with what I did wrong; how could the son I helped raise possibly be so far from God’s ways? Seems like everyone of Life’s biggest decisions he’s made has contradicted what we taught him. My heart is broken, but I am holding fast to God and faith, praying our son soon sees God more clearly and knows all of us are on his side.

          • Elephant

            You did nothing wrong. I keep telling myself that everyday. I guess it is normal to wonder what we did or did not do to cause the situation. God bless you and keep those prayers coming.

          • Renee

            This is also my story.

        • Michele

          I could have written this post, but about my daughter. Thank you for sharing because I feel less alone. My daughter turned away from the church because of its teachings on homosexuality and, even though she personally would never have an abortion, she feels it’s wrong for the church to dictate to others what is right and what is wrong. Let us pray for all our children who don’t know or have rejected truth.

          • Janice Marler

            I, also, have a daughter who is a lesbian. She is against the Catholic Church because it is against her. It won’t accept what God made her to be, she says, and therefore can’t accept them ( even though she – and her two sisters- have been through 14 years of Catholic schools). Concerning your daughter’s stand on our dictating our beliefs upon others: I remember having that exact mindset in my twenties. A petition came around against abortion and I refused to sign it for that very reason. Now, at almost seventy, I see how wrong I was. Over the years I have signed many petitions against abortions and a lot of other issues. Abortion is murder, pure and simple. Everyone should fight against it. It is against humanity itself. And we should be standing up for life simply as humans fighting for the rights of other humans who can’t speak up for themselves. Our church isn’t dictating this, our very essence is. We just don’t have the right to destroy human life ( and if it isn’t human, then what is it?). Anyway, sometimes we simply need age to see matters more maturely.

        • Carolyn Orsi

          My daughter is now 35 and was raised Catholic. She told me for years that she just felt uncomfortable at church. It was boring and unfulfilling. All three of her children were baptized Catholic; however, that was sufficient for her. It has taken her 15 years to finally find a church home. She loves it there, and so do her children. I have been blessed with her decision. I don’t know what motivated her to start going to church, but I thank God for answering my prayers.

      • Lynne

        My prayers are with you.

        • Joe S.

          Thank you for all the posts very inspiring and insightful. As a young man I understand where your children are at in there lives. There was a period of many years where I went to church but was very Luke warm and distant from God. Two years ago my eyes were opened and I have felt grace for the first time in a long time. Recently a quote from the book crazy love by Frances chan stood out to me. It is that God has a specific mission for all of us. I took that personally as maybe my struggles will allow me to connect with someone down the path to bring them to the kingdom. We don’t know the big plan and why ripples are put onto our life stream. Hang in there and don’t give up hope. God bless!!

      • Heidi Johnson

        My prayers are with you! It is hard watching people you love not being the best that they can be, but they have to want it for themselves.

      • Stephanie Fricke

        Andrea, I have a 28year old son who claims to be agnostic. My son’s were brought up going to church each weekend. They went to Catholic walkthrough eighth grade. They are no strangers to the Lord. This breaks my heart, especially as their mom. It’s been a struggle for me to let go and let God take it over. I believe my son will one day know God again. Like Matthew says in this chapter, “You are going to be tempted as coaches (for us, parents) to judge ourselves by how well the participants (our children) perform.” So Andrea, let’s trust in God and His goodness and His timing, and let’s stop judging ourselves for our children’s choices. I will pray for you, and your son. God loves you and your son. Peace and blessings.

      • Theresa Fiscus

        I too struggle with my son not accepting that God exists. Try and pray as I might, he is just not ready to accept God in his daily life. However, one thing we do have to remember, even Jesus with all of his miracles and love, could not make some believe. So if Jesus was not able to make some believe and follow him, we shouldn’t beat ourselves up so much about it. Like Jesus, we can pray for them.

      • Susan Henderson

        You say your son argues which means you must be having some exchanges about it. Maybe you should just listen to him & ask him some penetrating questions & let him hear his own thought processes as he answers. So you believe that you are just an accident of nature? So you believe the material world is all there is? So bc you believe that physical matter is all that exists, you would agree that there are not such things as love, your own thoughts, or any morality? (These things are not physical, material realities & can not be seen with any scientific instrument.) So bc there can be no measure of morality in a universe of the survival of the fittest, would you agree that Hitler’s genocide of the Jews was a good thing bc he was using natural selection to ensure his more “fit” Aryian race would survive & dominate? Let him listen to what he is saying he believes. Maybe he really does believe it. But maybe he has not thought through all the implications of what he says he believes. Or maybe he wishes there was no God bc this will allow him to do anything he wants (such as engage in sexual gratification, for example) with no eternal consequences.

      • Telma Morales de Valdez

        Pray, just pray with all your heart, you will see the results. God has a special ear for us, moms. From my own experience I can tell you. 🙏🏼

      • Gale

        prayers are coming your way.

      • Jennifer

        My 20-year-old son is the same way. It is tough but it makes me resolve to be a better Christian example and step up my game in the hopes he sees that and it turns his heart. Good luck to you on this journey:)

      • Babciamel

        My son is agnostic after being part of the cult known as Wiccan. Can you imagine my grief when he told me during his senior year of H.S.? I was beside myself with grief. I had returned to college and was attending a Catholic University. I had to go to a professor and tell him I was unprepared for a major test (luckily I had already established myself as an excellent student) and burst into tears as soon as I opened my mouth to speak. The professor introduced me to the history of St. Monica and her son, St. Augustine. I went to the library and took out a book about them. It gave me much hope. He has been in and out of trouble (mostly in) his whole life. He is now 42 and is incarcerated…still hasn’t learned the rules are for him as well as everybody else. My daughter believes in God, but doesn’t go to church. She says it is because of the pedophile scandals; but I think that is just her excuse to not have to go. Just when I thought I had reconciled myself to God taking care of all of this, my daughter’s son (my only grandchild) announced that he was atheist when he was 18. This was a kid that loved his faith. Even though he went to a public school, he was very active in the youth group, attending seminars, weekend retreats, and even went to Stubenville. I had to start my journey of acceptance all over again. I have prayed my heart out for all three of them. My grandson is now 22 and in the Navy. His fiancée gave birth to his son last summer. It was a very high risk pregnancy. Although premature, the baby was born relatively healthy My grandson has since used words like “miracle” and “blessing.” Imagine my joy? Though he doesn’t admit returning to God, I think deep down he has….he just hasn’t realized it and/or admitted it to himself yet. As I read this thread, I noticed how many said the people they were praying for were in their teens….a time of questioning and rebellion. I don’t remember rebelling or even questioning the existence of God when I was a teen. So, like so many others here, I want my whole family to believe in God and Jesus with all that they have in them. I know that it is the surest road to happiness and the only road to heaven.

      • Patricia Brady

        My son turns 17 this week, and I am struggling with the same issue. I just continue to pray and ask God to give me guidance in how to handle this and what to say. I pray that God will put people or situations in his path that will help place him in the right direction. I will pray for your son too, Andrea.

      • Alicia Moranville

        When you feel like a failure just remember St. Monica…she prayed and prayed for St. Augustine…and look at how he turned out!! You are not a failure as long as you are showing him what it is to be a Christian and as long as your NEVER give up praying! Peace be with you and I pray that you son will find his way home again!

      • Janice Marler

        I will. 18 is very young. With prayers and maturity he’ll probably will see that there is a God.

      • joanna cavalcante

        My son is like that too! I pray everyday for his conversion and I know it’s Gods will and not mine.

      • Andrea

        Hello! I just read this and my immediately felt like I needed to encourage you. I prayed for your son, and Anita, your brother. You need to know that I have seen God do great miracles as far as his mercy towards family members. We prayed for my aunt for over 30 years. God has now brought her safely into His fold. My grandma faithfully loved her despite rejection and now at 88 years old my grandma gets to go to Bible study with her daughter! My brother spent many years rebelling and can’t get enough of His Savior now. This is my hope for your loved ones and my encouragement. Remember that few people are convinced with arguing but by being the recipients of underserved grace and love.

      • Colleen Michelle Amos-Mezinze

        Andrea you have my prayers sister in Christ💖

      • maria torres

        Continue to pray for him. Give it to the Lord. He will never let you down. Trust in Him. In your interactions with him, speak of the Lord and how he has affected your life. Without judgement or pressure, allow the Lord to speak to your son through your love for him.

      • Michele Hillaker

        I was listening to Fr. John Ricardo one night about parents beating themselves up when their child leaves the faith. I have cried many tears over this as my oldest son has left the church. Fr. Ricardo reminded us that there were some people even Jesus could not get to believe. Do we think we are better than Him? He was standing right there in the flesh and they still walked away. That helped me. I still pray constantly for my son, daughter in law and siblings to come back to the faith. Prayer and sacrifices that’s all you can do. Showing unconditional love too. My son knows we worry about him and pray for him. Daily mass helps. I pray for all who have left the faith.

      • Kathy Laubach

        Don’t give up. After over 15 years away from Catholicism, our son returned to the Church a year ago. There is hope and a reconversion is real. God bless you and give you strength to keep praying.

      • Suzie Dennis

        I am in the same situation with my 19 year old. We attended Mass every week. Now that he is away at college, he doesn’t believe anymore. What’s worse is that he is following people who are not making the right choices in life. He has so much going for him and I am so scared he will throw away his talent and not live up to his potential. Prayers for you during this time. Totally understand your situation.

      • Barney John

        Andrea, I think your son got a wrong concept about God, a God who lives somewhere in space, or a God who does mighty things etc, etc. First he has to be convinced that God works naturally, in ways we are not told about. He can understand God only if he is taught to see God in the loving actions of people. Only if he is able to understand that God who was invisible, made Himself visible by taking a human form. And this is manifested through Jesus’ life and teaching and many people who have imitated Him. And that God entered into His own creation, the pinnacle of his creation, that is Adam and Eve, – who were imperfect since they were created from the slime of the earth – and therefore from within them He continues to perfect them into His own image and likeness. And so we can see that He lives within us through this story of Genesis. And where ever there is love and kindness, pity and compassion and empathy there God is in action. I pray and hope your son will find God in you and later in his own life.

      • Diane Grohn

        My Father is a belligerent Atheist. He is 87 yrs old. We children were raised Atheist but Baptized a s babies. I have a strong faith. Dad now that Mother is gone, he tells me often he is not perfect.. I wish he had the Sacrament of Reconciliation. I keep telling him , Only dead people are perfect. that god gave us free will and sometimes we make the bad decision.

      • gina ursino

        my son was,raised in the catholic church and went to catholic school and as a adult he currently does not believe in God. it brakes my heart but i am simply praying that God can intervene and that my son will hear his voice. i cannot force him to embrace his faith but i can continue to embrace mine and pray for him. my son has to find his own path and i figure the best thing i can do is to have my path be one of trust, love and prayer. i love him no matter what and i hope that through unconditional love, like the love God has for me, that maybe my son will yearn at some point to have that bavk again in his life. hang tight and pray.

      • Tracy

        Andrea, I know how you feel as my son also does not believe there is a God. Its heartbreaking because we sent him to Catholic schools his whole life, he participated in Kairos and became so much closer to God at that time. He even told me when I was going through breast cancer that God was there for me and would help me through it but then he went to college and something changed. I’m not sure if it was friends he hung out with or professors but now he doesn’t believe in God. I feel like a failure too and I pray everyday that he will find his way back to God because I honestly believe that him not believing has affected his life negatively so I ask for prayers for my son as well.

      • susan

        Prayers for your son are being joined to yours.

      • Mari

        Andrea, possibly it’s your son’s failure, to open his heart and mind to the possibilities, and not your failure in being able to show / teach your son. Maybe if you don’t talk / push him towards God but lead by example in everything you do, he will discover God on his own. Just remember that God loves you and even if your son doesn’t believe in God, he’s is still loved by God.
        Keep praying,
        Mar

    • Brittany Foti

      Hi Anita,
      I will pray for your brother!

      • Anita

        Thank you.

    • Elaine

      I will be praying. My husband and son both struggle accepting God as their savior. It’s so hard because I want them to have what I have. God. God bless you. Dear Jesus please help Anita’s brother to believe in you and invite you into his life as well as my son and husband. Amen

      • Anita

        Thank you Elaine.

    • Joy Dauterman

      Praying for your brother

      • Anita

        Thank you Joy!

    • Betz Kaplan

      Anita, I can relate to your story. I have 2 brothers that have left the church. One has Alzheimer’s and the other just found his journey here on earth proabaly will end this year due a brain tumor. Like your brother these are good men. I will put you brother also on n my prayers. God Bless you and your family.

      • Anita

        Thank you! I will pray for your brothers too.

    • RD

      I have people in my life that I wonder, have they forgotten God? Or Why do they have such a negative image of God and reject Him? I was led to a retreat that encouraged me to trust myself and those I love to the Blessed Mother’s awesome intercession. It’s not some sort of magic formula or anything, but I have gotten a lot of comfort since the retreat. I really feel that I am not praying for these people alone.

      Mary is Jesus’ mother, and on the cross, Jesus made her our mother also. . .and the mother of this person we are worried about. Mary trusts Jesus perfectly to help. (“They have no wine” is solved with the words, “Do whatever He tells you.” The bride and groom are the ones with a problem. Jesus finds the servants who will listen to Him to help him solve that problem.) I just feel that when I ask Mary for help, when I ask her to join me in praying for someone, Jesus’ grace is able to influence others all the more.

      I’m not sure I’m explaining myself well. But if your brother “has no wine” (has lost the joy of knowing God). Mary will help us trust Jesus with this problem and Jesus will work His miracle (using the servants nearby who will listen and “do whatever He tells you.). God bless.

      • Anita

        Thank you RD for such kind words and taking the time to explain your feelings related to how Mary helps you in your prayer. I will definitely ask for her intercession. Thank you again.

      • Jeff

        Beautifully said. Your words are helping me in my prayers for my family. Thank you. God bless

      • Bonnie

        I really appreciate your analogy. It truly brought me to an amazing “aha” moment in terms of my own life, asking myself, “What if Jesus is trying to use me (a servant) to touch the life of another? What if I am not paying attention and failing to do whatever He tells me? What if I am failing not only myself but those that Jesus has put in my path?” You have made an incredible impact on my life. Thank you.

    • sharon

      my son has left the church please pray for him. he is my only child. he is involved in some type of supernatural practices tarot cards and spells and I don’t know what to do other than continue to pray and witness Gods love to him

      • kj

        I will pray for you and your son. This must seem so overwhelming! I would feel like you if this was my child. Continue to pray. Talk to your pastor. He will have sage advice for you. Remember, you do not have to face this alone! Get in touch with your Christian friends and have them pray.

      • Cathy Szydlowski

        I also have two brothers who have turned away from God. Prayer is the only way to channel the hurt.

      • Sue

        I was raised in a Southern Baptist church. My father was the pastor. We had to go to church every time there was any kind of service. As soon as I left home at the age of 17 I was so glad to be rid of the church! For years I wanted nothing to do with the church of any kind. I felt guilty– so I took my 2 little girls to a Baptist church. I taught Sunday School, i was a GA leader, but it just didn’t feel right. So once again I gave up church. Then, one Friday nite after bowling, I was sitting in the bar next to a girl I didn’t even know. We got to talking & she said she had a wonderful woman who was in St Louis MO who could tell your future. She was going the next day & asked me if I would like to go with her. I have always been curious about this stuff– so I said Yes. For me it was life changing–she told me I had Guardian Angels watching over me all the time. I was astounded! So now my quest was to find a church who also knew & believed in Angels. I found that parish in Holy Family Catholic church . Of course I did not find it by myself–my sister who had converted to Catholicism 8 years earlier, encouraged me to just check it out. So I did. I discovered God is a loving God who forgives & loves me. I would not have even considered that if it wasn’t for that woman. My point is, Sharon, God moves in mysterious ways. My Mother & father had prayed for me for years, but my Heavenly Father knew how to reach me. So don’t give up your prayers, God knows how to reach him.

    • Karen

      Yes will pray for him. My brother also has stepped away from the church, I don’t think from God. Let’s offer up some small suffering for them this lent. God bless you and keep praying!

    • Allison Baskin

      Praying for him Anita as well as my brother and his wife who also doubt Jesus as the Son of God. Thankfully their 4children attend a Christian church with their maternal grandmother but I still worry for my brother!

    • A Sinful Soilder of Christ

      For those who claim to be atheist and want to make the argument that there is no God, I would recommend an excellent book by a non-Catholic, but very Christian physician, Dr. Charles Gordon from Tyler, TX. The book is titled “In Plain Sight, Seeing God’s Signature through Creation” (ISBN 978-0-615-33375-5).

      This book is mostly photographs that compare patterns found throughout nature from sub-atomic particles to the vast reaches of the universe and shows patterns that are repeated on multiple scales, the “signature” of an intelligent creator and not just things which happened by chance. The book format is that it is divided into 40 daily units of 3 or 4 pages each, with the photographs, some reflective thoughts and challenging questions from Dr. Gordon and some biblical references to contemplate when reviewing each set of God’s patterns (His signatures) which He has placed before us in plain sight.

      • Suzzz

        I also recommend books by C.S. Lewis………. especially “Mere Christianity”……

    • Patricia

      Praying for your brother, Anita!

    • Monica Moreno-Mata

      Praying for your brother and your family! 🙏🏻 I have a similar situation with my brother. ☹️ And one of the topics we discuss is baptizing my 3 year old nephew which I obviously want more for him and he doesn’t feel it’s necessary. This makes me sad 😢 There are also lots of things I want for my only son who is getting ready to go off to college. I’m doing my best to back off so that he can gain more independence but it’s so hard to not let your motherly instincts take over.
      🙏🏻☝🏼👼🏼💔

    • ml

      I have a son who proclaims being an atheist as well. I try to have discussions with him, but that does not work. In order for me to find peace, I have placed him in God’s hands and pray for the Holy Spirit to come and move him back toward the church and God. The struggle is real as this has been my prayer for nearly 2 years, but I can’t give up and must continue praying that one day he will see the Light.

    • Heather F

      I’ll definitely pray for your brothers and all the others folks have mentioned. It’s so hard seeing the people we love deny the love and grace that could make them truly happy and free. My husband isn’t a Christian and it makes things very hard sometimes, especially raising our son. I am grateful though that my husband has supported our son going to a Catholic school. That has been a total blessing and I’m hopeful that it will open my husband’s eyes to see all the ways God loves and cares for us.

    • Cherie Decker

      I will keep your brother in prayer today

    • Sue

      Praying that your brother will come to believe in the loving God and Jesus, our Savior.

    • Laurette

      Anita thank you…..I have two daughters who do not practice their
      Catholic Faith. But they are living IT. One married a non-practicing Methodist. The other firmly feels that the church is full of hypocrites. She married a three times divorced Catholic. We cherish our sons-in-law. Their lives are so filled with Corporal and Spiritual works of mercy, that I thank God every day.
      Please pray that our grandchildren will come to know God and His ways, and I will pray for your brother to be a Christian.

      • Suzzz

        My protestant husband is the best example of what being a Christian should be! He will come to mass with me 2 – 3 times a year if I ask him to, but I don’t push it. God finds us in various ways.

    • Carol Golembiewski

      Dear Anita,

      Wow–this hit home for me. Ten years ago (can it possibly be that long ago?) my son told me at age 22 that I can’t make him go to church anymore. I will never forget that feeling at that moment. It is my constant prayer for him to come back to church–it seems impossible, but I truly believe, that with our Lord by our side, nothing is impossible. I will never give up on that hope, never.

    • Ruth

      My mother went through that struggle with me (and some of my other siblings) when we grew up and stopped going to church. We were baptists and it was hard to keep a faith that my parents also struggled with in a church that taught so many things that were hard to reconcile.

      I am now going through RCIA and have told my mother that I will be baptized this spring and invited her to the Easter celebration. I have felt so much love in the Catholic church and found so many answers there, but when I told her about my baptism she seemed upset that I was ‘leaving’ the church. That was very difficult to hear.

      I understand the pain I probably caused her by leaving the church, but I would urge those on here hoping for loved ones to turn back to God to talk to those people about why they left, what they are looking for, and helping them find a faith community where they can find those things even if it’s not the faith community you were hoping they would find. God is everywhere and never stops reaching out to those who are seeking or who have lost their way.

    • helena handbasket

      As my parish priest reminds us, “St. Monica prayed for her son Augustine to accept God for 16 years.”

    • Lillian

      I too recently had a conversation with my girls who were raised in the church and no longer attend because they find it hard to reconcile their worldly views with church teachings. One believes that her God would not give us free will to live and act as we will only to condemn us for those actions. So therefore, she does not need to attend mass, go to confession, or even pray because her God knows her heart. The other has turned her back on the church because she believes the church denies homosexuals (of which she has many friends) the rights to marry and be happy. She does not believe that her God would make someone to have a sexual orientation other than the norm only to condemn them by living and acting according to who they are.
      My response was that God is a good and loving parent and like all good parents, we set boundaries or rules because we want what is good for our children. When we stray or break those rules, we have to have consequences for our actions. We like God, NEVER EVER stop loving our children, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have to answer for the thing we do wrong. Sadly, I did not seem to make any headway.

    • Mary Ruffcorn

      I will pray for your brother Anita. I have people in my immediate and extended family that need prayers along those lines as well.

    • Eduardo Hoover

      You’re in tough spot and I’m convinced you need far more prayer than your brother to be a wise tactful witness for your brother. You are going to have to be the true example as a Christian because I’m sure he takes notice of your devotion to your faith. I will pray for you Anita that you live your faith to be a beacon for your brother’s safe journey in this life. May actions speak volumes to your brother’s soul through Jesus and Mary.

    • Janice Marler

      I will. One of our daughters thinks that she is a witch (after 14 years of Catholic school) and does spells and weird things. She is 38 years old and is back living with us. Please, pray for her, too.

    • RM

      Anita, Pope Francis has said that even atheist will make it to heaven, if they are good people. Just because they don’t know God, doesn’t mean that He doesn’t know them. God loves us all.

    • DanaMari

      Will be praying for him Anita.

      Pax, Dana

    • Donna

      My daughter recently told me she wouldn’t be going to church with me anymore because she is now agnostic. This is a terrible pain for a parent.

    • Sharon Cullen

      Anita, I know that horrible feeling all too well. Both of my twins left the church. One is gay, and has claimed to be wicker since he was 17 and meet some awful ppl who steered him wrong. I made mistakes along the way too. But now they’re 31. My otter sin believes in a”higher power”but not that Jesus is the Christ. They went to Catholic high school and that’s when everything changed. I’m not blaming the school. It’s the age i think.
      All we can do is let them see our light shine, and we can pray, pray, pray. We also can’t claim to Inouye what Jesus does at our judgement, but He doesn’t want any human in hell. He wants us together. I keep my hope in that, knowing that Jesus is so merciful, and that when these people feel that love from God penetrating their souls, they’ll do they right thing. And there’s always guide he in earth as well. As a parent losing a child is the most horrific thought, add losing them for eternity us even worse. But remember what Jesus did for us. I gaffe to tell myself sometimes, “Sharon don’t you think he’d do it all over again if he had to?” But he doesn’t have to.
      I hope this helps you a bit. Ask everyone you know to pray for him. I will right now.

    • susan

      Anita, I understand how you feel. I want much more for my two sons and one of my daughters but they just don’t want to hear. I have given this up to God in prayer. I shall pray for your brother also knowing God can break through the hardened hearts of those we love so much. Remember God wants our loved ones with Him more than we do. For His perfect Love weeps for our loved ones. Continue to pray as I pray with you.

  • Steve Woulfe

    Our children are our gifts from God, and i feel the we will always want more for them then they want for themselves. Pearl your daughter will realized the pregnancy as a gift when she holds that baby in her arms. I think the toughest lesson in life per the conversation today is to allow God to fill us with what he wants for us. Don’t put limits on ourselves as society does. Close your eyes open yourself to God and ask for all he has for us. Embrace the gifts he has for us and go out and live a life that he has planed for us. No barriers between you and him.

  • Paulina

    As a wife and mother, I long for my husband and children to have God in the center of their lives and to know and feel his love. Today was a reminder of how God feels about me and he wants the same for me!

  • Michael Baur

    I was teaching high school kids with emotional behavior disorders, a few years back. There was a student of mine who had a horrible past and horrible situation at home.
    He did not want to be at high school because he did not see the point of a high school education. He thought he did not need an education, so he shut down and did not want to go to classes. He wanted to sell drugs. I wanted him to have a better life and a education. so he could get a if his situation.

  • Brian

    The challenge is getting people to realize their potential. I have found myself arguing with certain people because they don’t think they are capable of more.

  • Steve Lazarus

    I have maybe too much “Coach” in me. Having coached youth basketball for over 20 yesrs, I know for a fact that I made way too many decisions in my Daughters lives and did not allow them to fail enough so that they could solve their own issues. Thankfully, they are much smarter than I and they are still accomplishing many good things and one is already a very good Mom to my two Grandsons. Love these reflections and the books. Thanks and God Bless, Steve

  • Chuck Havers

    Wanting something for someone else so much is directly connected to the love we feel for them, I know this feeling well especially for both my kids and my grandchildren. Knowing this and recognizing this is exactly the same with God and his love for us allows us to better understand our relationship with him, after all we are his children. God Bless

  • Lori

    Of course as a parent,I too have always wanted more than I was raised with for my three kids…not in material things but in Christian values, spiritual growth and understanding. They are all adults now and I feel like I failed. As a result I long for this JOY I am supposed to be feeling… I spend time each day praying for them and breaking down the readings and am always amazed with the wisdom that jumps off of the pages at me. I just realized I have to stop beating myself up about it and trust that God will take care of it.

    Thank you Matthew for providing such a wonderful resource for us!

    • L. Wojcik

      As a teen and young adult I did not have God as an active part of my life. I did not want to know God because I was afraid of the unknowns and that God would not like me the way I was. When some bad things happened in my life some family members were there for me, they prayed for me. They gave me things to read (for me reading was a better way for me to get to know God again). I let God into my life and am still happily on the journey, so now as a parent I see my children making the same mistakes and I want to fix it for them but I can’t. I will continue to pray for them and tell them how much God cares for them. He saved a wretch like me…

      • Sheri CW

        You are a wonderful example to your children! Let them continue to see your love for God and the Church and how HAPPY and non resisting you are to your faith and God! The Divine Mercy Chaplet is a beautiful prayer to say for conversion. In some ways I have and still am walking your exact path. Unfortunately, sometimes, it takes a trial to bring us back to the Church. It’s what brought me back. Keep praying! Have Faith and don’t resist happiness!

      • Glen Guidry

        I’ve learned over the years, that it’s never too late to write a letter, yes, even to a grown child, to ask for forgiveness for my perceived or real shortcomings as a parent and share with them what I wish I had shared more effectively with them, when they were younger. It was cleansing for me and a witness to them, how to live a life free of regrets. Oh, and a lot of prayers for them along the way can’t hurt either.

        • Kathy Hawkins

          I love your idea of writing a letter to our (grown) children. A fellow small group sharing member said that was her Lenten goal, to write to each child and express her faith and her desire for them. I like your idea of expressing a request for forgiveness for perceived or real shortcomings as a parent and what we wish we had shared more effectively with them as parents. Thank you for sharing these ideas. God bless you.

          • Glen Guidry

            All glory to God!

      • Cathy Busa

        Great message. Thank you for sharing!

    • Sue

      Amen!

    • Nancy Etzkorn Dukes

      Lori, your comment struck a chord with me. I feel like I failed as well. I didn’t know Jesus like I do now when my children were little. As I have matured, I realize what is important in life and wish I could have instilled that in my children when they were living with me. I too pray for them daily. Lori, we did the best we knew how at the time. You are right….trust that God will take care of it!. Peace to you…..

    • Jane Deutschlander

      Lori – I could have written your words. I too have three children, now young adults who are no longer interested in their Faith. I raised them to love and trust God – I don’t know where I went wrong and struggle with that on a daily basis. I want them to feel God’s love as I do. Today’s reflection has definitely eased my mind… I will continue to pray for them and put them in God’s hands.

    • Barbara Barger

      Lori, I feel exactly the same way. As the years go by, I worry so much that I will be gone and they will drift further and further from God.

    • Julia Oaks

      Lori, I was constantly beating myself up as well. My three kids were raised as a Catholic but they do not attend mass. I have taught CCD, been active in my church. All we can do is to pray that God will guide them back to the sacraments and to trust in him. Know you are not alone. Praying for you and your family.

    • Mary B.

      Lori I can totally relate to you! My faith in God has never been stronger than it is today at 52 years old!! I must remember that when I was my kid’s age, God was not as important in my life! I tried very hard this Lent to convince them to be part of this retreat but I can just tell that they seem to be too busy with their lifestyles! This frustrates me because it goes back to what Matthew said ” we want more for our children than they want for themselves”!! I want them to realize that they can achieve true happiness by putting God first in their lives! Fortunately, my faith in God is so strong and so undeniable that I am certain that God has a great plan for both of my kids, and I am going to trust in His plan! I am absolutely positive about this!!!! This video was by far the most meaningful to me – thank you Matthew!!

    • Denise

      Well said, both of my children have turned away form organized religion, though our son more so than our daughter. Once I spoke to a very wise woman who said….”you have done your best, now it is up to your children and God to do the rest” she helped me to see that I had no control over this, and I needed to let go and Let God. I still do pray daily for my children to know God in their lives, reminding myself that God is at work all the time

  • Tom

    Yes and I know God will show me the way if I’m just patient enough.

  • Dave McCormick

    Yes! I had an employee who I knew had his heart in the right place, but was not attentive to what he was doing some of the time. I was tortured one year when I prepared to give him a performance rating that would indicate he was acceptable (but not exceptional). When I gave it to him, I offered some positive insights, as well as the problems we had over the prior year. To my surprise, he was all right with being just okay.

  • Kevin

    I pray almost daily that my new grandchild will be brought up in a home where they know God. My son is not a believer and although I am for many years when I was younger and he was a child I was not an active follower. That guilt for something that God long ago has already forgiven me for and my love our Lord now truly make day four’s question so meaningful to me.

  • Dorsey

    It goes without saying that I want more for my children. It’s a struggle for my to teach them instead of trying to force it on them. I pray for guidance in doing so, and an open heart and mind in them. This program is wonderful. ❤🙏

  • Doug

    Not long ago Pope Francis said that it is better to be an atheist than a bad Catholic. I agree with that. If I were to consistently sin, not go to confession, and yet receive the Eucharist…in a sense I am turning away from God.

    I began my spiritual transformation 5 years ago this month. I finally “got it”. Now I pray for family members and friends to feel the way I do in my intimate relationship with our Lord. Instead of selling clothes at a yard sale, for example, I prefer to give them to someone without the means to purchase. My wife is a very good person that hasn’t quite figured it out regarding helping others. I pray for here daily that she will be whole and complete with God. My hope is that she will be as happy as I am, in Christ, so that she will never go through the pains of stress, worry and fear.

  • Alexander DiMercurio

    Yes, For our sons…that they want to come back to the church. That they understand how much more life will mean to them.

    • Skip

      Alexander, I can relate. We have two daughters that are strong faith women and two sons that just cannot always seem to find mass as a priority. I too want them to come back to the church. The best of luck for you and your sons.

  • maureen

    Yes – as a parent you always want more for your children. I have wanted my son to go to school since he got out of the Navy. He never felt he could do it. I know he could – tried to let him know that ever time we talked about it. Well, almost 9 years later he finally signed up for school. There is some many thinks I want for my children and grandchildren. All I can do is pray.

  • Jerry

    Each day In my college freshmen classes, I work with young people who are filled with aspirations and dreams that are sometimes thwarted by bad habits and common human failings. I do my best to help them get back on track with themselves. It’s feels really great to see them grow and become the best in the class. The “A” students are easy to reward! But it hurts when they slip away and the tough part is giving them that final grade—maybe a “D” or even an “F” because I saw in them the “A+” that they truly are. This reminds me how Jesus hung around with the outcasts and “failures” of His world. Not the outstanding “winners.”Why? And how God is willing to stay with me even in the midst of my own shortcomings and screwups…

  • Alexander DiMercurio

    Maybe I am being selfish…but I too feel as though I ( we) have failed as a parent.

    • Jules

      Alexander, you only fail as a parent if you stop loving your child or children.. We are all here on earth learning and going through the process.., if we keep our hearts and mind open to God’s forgiveness and love and have that same belief for our children we are not failures even if we do make mistakes. That is why God’s love is so amazing, he knows we stumble and he is always there to keep picking us up… It’s just up to us to take a hold of his hand. It may be at our very last breath but he is there for us. That’s all we can be for our children, too with arms wide open!

  • Stephen Satter

    For addicted family members, for family not living their Catholic faith, for my children in every aspect of their lives, for my spouse to want to be the best version of herself. I’m sure people want things for me more than I want them for myself. It comes down to will, want, prayer and then taking the effort to achieve these good things. Unfortunately we are inclined as a whole to take the path of least resistance. Continue to pray for those you want good things for and also ask God to help you want and strive for what will help you achieve the great things He wants for you.

    • Roberrt

      Thanks for sharing Stephen and I could not agree more.

      And blessed are they who find their way, their meaning, through the support of their parent, their friend, their sibling, their spouse.

      Lesson for me: 1) Keep close to and always listen to your support “structure” they are there for a reason and often have a clearer lay of the land than I; and 2) Never forget your role in supporting those you encounter.

      • Stephen

        Thanks Robert for your words of wisdom. God bless!!

  • Dina Simmons

    Boy did this hit home. I have a son with such incredible gifts and talents and he has no motivation at all. It is heartbreaking and frustrating watching him waste so much of his life. I of course can also look within and see how many times I resist doing what God wants for me.

  • Ethel L

    I always wanted the best for my son and daughter. I want them to have what I don’t. When I was pregnant, I read everything my hands could get into on how to raise good, better, best kids. Listened to all classic music, enrolled in piano lessons at 3 and etc. Long time ago I realized I could only do so much for them. They have to want to be successful too. They have to want to be the best of them too.Then I started to be more loving , more kind and pray more. I need more help of discipline than they did. They thought me how. I learned acceptance and above all I learned to love them more.

    • Jules

      Wow, Ethel, your words spoke to me just now. This is what I must do! I need to “be more loving, more kind and pray.” Thank you for sharing your thoughts… I want to be a better mother and wife and I think this is how I must start being if I want happiness. 💗🙏✝

      • Ethel L

        Jules! It’s not easy, but it’s doable. Empowering them and trusting their decision boasts their confidence. My son is now 17 and he told me;” Mom thank you for trusting me!” I just could cry.

        • Jules

          Wow, that just put tears in my eyes! How beautiful! Thank you Ethel for your encouraging words! Amen.

          • Ethel L

            My pleasure Jules! Will pray for you and your intentions.

        • Mary B.

          Empowering and trusting – two key words!!!!

          • Ethel L

            Sooo true ,Mary B! It’s hard to do but the outcome is profound.

  • Marise Petry

    As a teacher, I experience that desire all the time for my students. I have a difficult time walking the line between letting them learn in their own time, by their own desire and wanting to do it for them. I often wish that through some kind of osmosis I could make what I know and understand flow into them. I feel their failure deeply and judge that I have in some way failed them either by my method of teaching or by my failure to inspire in them the desire to possess the knowledge for themselves.

    • Nancy

      I taught for many years before I became a stay home mom. I always said the hardest part of teaching was when you knew kids could do it but really didn’t want to. I’ve learned that this is also the most frustrating part of being a parent. I used to tell my kindergartners, “You know how much Mommy & Daddy love you?” We’d talk about that and then I’d tell them that God loves them millions of times more than that! Hard to imagine in our small human minds! What I really struggle with is how the technology in our world pulls our kids away from the desire to do other things. (Things that I want more for them than they do!) I’m trying to guide, be more patient & allow them to walk their own paths.)

  • brian

    As a single parent I have loved my son like a father and mother and tried to keep him close to the Church and the Lord but as he aged he stopped believing. I pray daily that he would come back to the Lord. He is a loving kind person and a wonderful son. I also pray he meets a Christian Catholic
    woman to share his life. We have a great relationship as father and son. I am enjoying the course.

  • Theresa

    Yes. I dated a man a couple years ago who experienced abuse as a child and also battled addiction. I wanted so badly for him to experience God’s healing love and mercy and to see what God has blessed him with. I wanted him to heal and allow love into his life. I felt hopeless as I couldn’t make that happen for him. I wanted it more for him than he did for himself. That experience taught me to let go of what I couldn’t control and allow God to do His perfect work.

    • JoAnn

      Theresa, thank you for your sharing, it opened my heart to a good discussion with God and my sweet husband. JoAnn.

  • Rachelle Gamblin

    I seem to go through this every RCIA class. I’m the RCIA director in my parish and every September I see the same thing. People not sure why they are in class and what is going to happen. I watch them as the class progresses and see the little flicker of flame that they came in with begin to grow bigger and bigger as we get closer to Easter Vigil. I want them to be as on fire for God as I am. I cry every time I see them receive confirmation and take their first communion. I rejoice with them and their families afterwards and I encourage them to continue on with the Church and stay involved. I continued in my faith in 2010 and I am still on fire. I love this time of year.

    • Joy Dauterman

      That’s beautiful! 🙂

    • Ma

      You go girl, way to give back and a true inspiration! Thanks for sharing…I also Love this time of year, growth always with The Lord.

  • Alicia

    For my nephew who has been on such a downward spiral since his father’s death 3 years ago. Family support seems to fall on deaf ears and currently he is again in trouble with the law and sitting in jail awaiting trial on domestic violence changes as well as other things. I can still see potential for his life and in general he is a good person, but seems to constantly sabotage himself. He also has no faith life. Pray that he will gain some wisdom and insight to change this destructive life path.

  • Mary

    I have. Family. Children, siblings & parents. I want them to know God & place God first in life. Family can be challenging. My sister has not only fallen away from our faith but also has left our family. I pray for her that she will find God & her way back. I also pray for my parents who are heart broken & want their family to all be able to come together. And for my children, that they renew their faith in God. Prayers for my family are appreciated. And thank you Matthew & Dynamic Catholic for this wonderful Lenten series. I was truly looking forward to this journey that God inspires you to help us walk.

  • Mary

    I so want a great life for my daughter. She has been given a fabulous education and strong Catholic upbringing. I want her to choose a Godly life.

  • GladeLady

    Oh, how I wanted to do more for my children! But all of a sudden becoming a single mother when they were both in their teens, I found that I couldn’t always help them in their dilemmas. But because I couldn’t, they found ways to help themselves and became better adults. God works wonders every day in our lives!

  • Cathy

    For my daughter who told me in grade nine that she is an atheist after she had encouraged a friend of hers to go back to catechism class and her friend went on to be confirmed but my daughter didn’t. It hurt so much. She hasn’t been to church since but is the most caring person towards anyone she meets. I pray every day that she will be touched again by Jesus and will come home to him.

  • Sue

    What a good lesson. I am a parent and when I think about wanting the best for my children I forgot the simple truth that God wants the best for me. When I forgive my children. I forget that God forgives me more then I forgive me. Thanks for enlightening me.

  • Sallie Giorgi

    Yes- for my daughters to become Christian – to know God, our Father, and for my step son and step daughter to return to Him. I pray to Him daily.

  • Jules

    Today’s lesson is great! I certainly feel this way about my children, spouse, family members, and friends and I guess I never turn it around enough to mirror how God wants this for me as well! It’s so much easier for me to focus on everyone else to want the best for them more than they do … Now it’s time for me to take this lesson and realize if I am the “Best Version of Myself” like God wants for me than I will be a better example for others than by just preaching or telling my kids or others how they should be. This is the gift of free will that I will use right now for myself! Thank you for today’s lesson! The only thing I wish is, is that there was a passage from the Bible that we were given each day through this lent that we could reflect on based on each day’s lessons.

    • Patti

      I too would like to apply daily scripture to our meditation. As Catholics we have sometimes gotten a bad wrap from other Christian denominations about not using our Bibles. But my home church is doing a very effect job of getting our congregation back to scripture.
      This Best Lent Ever might use a one liner from our Bible to reflect on each day. It is certainly an easy add on, because searching God’s word can find a parallel for any aspect of our daily struggle.

    • Dynamic Catholic

      Thank you for the feedback! This Lent’s program is focused on overcoming resistance and Resisting Happiness, but will we consider how to add scripture that closely aligns with the overall theme for our future programs.

  • Maureen Bodnar

    Yes, for a friend who is 67, so not a kid. She is a wonderful, loving and trustful friend however her late husband emotionally and verbally abused her and she has such a low opinion of herself and all I want for her is to walk erect, like she’s not broken, to stop apologizing to everyone when she has perceived she’s done wrong to them and I pray for her to have more self respect and value for her life.

  • Scott Sowers

    Yes, all the time. It’s really hard to see potential in musicians that are talented or artists that are awesome or smart people with ideas and their want to succeed, but they don’t make an effort. I talk to them, encourage them and let them know they can do it. I don’t think I cross the line. I’m sure they want to tell me to go away or hush sometimes, but I just want to help them. I guess I need to look at what God wants for me and work on that for myself. What’s the old phrase, “You can take a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.” Blessings.

  • Teresa Verkinderen Schmitz

    Yes, I can relate but also can see how others say the same about me. How wonderful it is to “let go” as Dominick wanted his son to do. Even that’s something so simple yet powerful!

  • Irma Torres

    Yes…I always pray that my son and daughter start attending church again. I make sure the kids are attending CCD and come to mass with me but at home they are not receiving any Christian upbringing. Please pray for Angel and Jocelyn. Thank You!

  • Holly Lanford

    As a parent I see the potential in both of my teenage sons. It frustrates my husband and I when we see our boys not do things with their gifts and talents out of fear of failure.

    Also as a teacher of immigrant children, I want more for my students than I think they can even imagine for themselves- like graduating from school and going on to college.

  • Peter N. Boos

    For sure.Our 16 year old grandson wants to leave school after this term.We think he needs to continue his education.

  • Janet

    Yes, I always want things more for my children, who are 27 and 30. I am REALLY going to try to focus on realizing that when it comes about. Since these last 4 days of reflection, I am increasingly aware of the resistance in my life and I am striving to overcome these situations. I need to empower others not enable them.

  • Diana Hall

    Yes. For my 3 girls. I am always sending them your books to read hoping they will get inspired and go to church more. I know they believe but I feel they don’t have a relationship with God. Like God, I just have to pray for them & hope some day it will happen for them like it did for me.

  • Sue Jurski

    Yes yes I do often!

  • yvonne

    I always and still want something better for my children than I do for myself. And I always pray that they follow their heart and not the world. As a parent it’s hard to see children go in the direction that is not the path you wished for them. But I trust in God.

  • Sheri CW

    I left the Catholic church for a very good non-denominational church when my sons were 5 & 3. They are now 32 and 30 years of age and non-believers. I left so that we could worship as a family since my ex-husband would not attend a Catholic mass with us. He was raised in a very Christian family but was very uncomfortable in the Catholic church. Even though we attended services regularly, there wasn’t a “bond” or attachment to this “new” way of celebrating our faith for 18 years. I learned plenty and appreciate that it’s probably what brought me back to my Catholic faith but I believe it drove my sons even further away-that, and the fact that I didn’t do my job as a parent to see that they were getting what they should have from “us” (their parents) to have a strong belief in God. How is it possible to have such wonderful, caring, kind children and yet non-believers? People always tell me what great sons I have! I pray for their conversion and so very badly want them to know the joy of being Catholic! I often hear Drew Mariani of “Relevant Radio” state that Jesus told St. Faustina that our prayers for conversion will be answered by praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet daily-maybe not during our life time, but conversion will happen. It’s what I ask for, what I most desperately want, for the conversion of my sons…

  • Vicki McDaid

    I woke up this morning thinking how I was doing more for my husband to lead him to recovery of alcoholism than he was. This whole series so far has been a daily reaffirmation to me that God has this. Yesterday I resolved to place God firmly in the center of my family, where he should have been all along, but sadly wasn’t. I pray that this Lent my husband will find his way back to Jesus and place his alcoholism at the foot of the cross. Immaculate Heart of Mary pray for us, Sacred Heart of Jesus have Mercy on us.

  • Steven Sisman

    I see this as a parent all the time. Something as simple as wanting my kids to use coconut oil on their hands during the winter because it’s painful to see little 2 and 5 year olds with chapped red hands. And when they don’t, I go ahead and do it because I want what’s best for them more than themselves. Or wanting others to experience Christ.

    I think wanting the best for someone else is a great Christian value that lurks in every human being but needs to be awakened. It can be awakened through life events like having kids or feeling God’s love like no other through an event like Curcillo. It also leads to humility and self-less-ness.

    “It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels.” -St. Augustine

  • Nancy R

    At first, I was thinking the message is that I need to resist having high hopes and dreams for others like my children.
    After reading the prayer, Jesus, I cannot imagine the happiness you desire for me. Help me to embrace your dream for my life. That’s when I realized, this is about me and being the best I can be. When I am the best person I can be, I am the happiest person for God and others. I will not resist God or happiness today!

  • Mary Kay

    Oh yes, how many many times have I wanted something more for our children and grandchildren.

  • Rachel Henderson

    One of my dearest friends is in a terribly abusive relationship. As much as I want her to be a Christian I want her to be safe first. I want her to see her worth, see that she deserves better, to know that whatever mind games he’s played on her are not real life. I want it for her and for her daughter (not his child, but still not good) I can only pray that she realizes her worth before it’s too late. And that he justly gets he prison sentence he deserves for what he did to her not that long ago.

  • Brittany Foti

    Yes. I want my sister to reunite with my family and talk to them again. I want to know that she is still going to Mass, however I am not sure if she is or not. We have not heard from her or seen her in 3 years. I pray for her because I want to know that she is okay and that Our Lord is with her.

  • Rae Mims

    I have definitely wanted more for others than they wanted for themselves. So, many good friends that I think are floundering for one reason or another. But,most importantly this year I started assisting with teaching CCD for the 9th/10th grade class who are preparing for confirmation. Their lack of knowledge is astounding though their lack of desire for knowledge is not. At that age, their parents are making them and they are just trying to check the box. I guess I want to give them something I didn’t have at that age – to be taught to truly understand what it means to now say – on your own – this is my faith and I believe.

    • Trudy Ray Parmarter

      Rae, my husband and I were Youth Ministers for many years so I can relate to what you are saying. Most of the kids who came to youth group on Sunday evening in our home were there because their parents wanted them to be there. Our message to the kids was that their parents what them to share their parents’ faith but that faith is something that they have to want for themselves. Ray, my husband, and I have raised 8 kids and currently have 16 grandkids and 3 great grands. My daily prayer for all of them is that they live up to the light that God has given them because even though I want all of them desperately to find God they have to want it as God has given all of us Free Will.

    • Trevor Pelkey

      As a CCD teacher and former CCD student, I have seen the same thing going on with these kids. A lot of them are there simply because their parents “force them” to be there. It is hard to inspire them to want it for themselves just as much as their parents want it. I can say, from personal experience, that it is possible. When I was in elementary school and even middle school, CCD was certainly not something that I looked forward to. I went there simply because I HAD to. It was not until high school, specifically my junior year, that I was truly inspired by my CCD teacher. He was a relatively young man with a lot of spirit and happiness within him. I could relate to him. He made CCD so interesting and fun. He inspired me to get closer to God, get more involved in the church, and even become a CCD teacher myself. I am now about to graduate high school, and can honestly say that I have become more and more inspired since the time I learned from him. I started watching Catholic preachers online, and came to love this one bishop that my priest recommended. If you haven’t already, you should mention him to your students. His name is Robert Barron. He truly recognizes that struggle the church is facing with young people leaving the church. He is a very intelligent man that can convince even the most (self-proclaimed) “sophisticated” atheist that God is behind everything! This comment is longer than I initially planned on it being and I apologize, but this is a topic I have recently become very passionate about, something I see almost every day.

      • Rae Mims

        Thank you very much. I will look up Robert Barron.

  • Julie

    As a parent, we all deal with this emotion of doing everything for our kids to give them a good life. I feel like if we just pray and stop worrying,and have faith that God can move mountains and bring the best in our kids, we will be happy and at peace. This constant worry is the work of devil. I think about Saint Monica as she continuously prayed for her son, through all the trials and it brought her son back to Christ. I believe in the mighty power of prayer and saying the rosary and letting our worries to God. There are days when I worry about their school, friends and so many things and I always talk to them about making right choices but then you have to let God work in them.
    It is a constant struggle but through it all we need to pray and God will give us the peace that surpasses all understanding.
    During this lent journey I want to focus more on prayer and let go of worries and anxieties and always trust in our Lord.

  • Lisa

    I teach in a Juvenile detention facility and am always struggling with wanting more for my students and believing they can achieve more. Sometimes to the point that my own happiness and feeling of success is wrapped up in whether they do as I believe they can. Wow! I have to stop that.

    • Bonnie

      Hi Lisa. I teach Grade 1/2 and I know that it is much different than teaching in a detention facility. But I understand what you’re saying about your own happiness being wrapped up in their success. I used to feel the same way, but I try and remember that I am in their lives for a reason. I may never know if I have made a difference especially with kids who struggle for a stable home life. But I was once told that students don’t remember what you teach them, they remember how you made them feel. And if I can help them know what it is to be loved and cared about, then I have done the most important thing I can do. God has given them the free will to embrace that love and care and let it impact their lives. He has given me the gift of being a part of it.

  • Jo

    My sister is atheist and I pray for her soul every single day.

  • Denise

    Yes. I have friends who are definitely capable of doing more with their lives and seem to be content to just do the bare minimum to get by when they have great gifts to share! I try to be encouraging, but try not to be overbearing. I pray that they get the confidence to break out and use their potential to the fullest!

  • Mary Pickruhn

    I have a whole list of things I want for others, mainly better health and no suffering. My son has rheumatoid arthritis throughout his body with the feet being really badly. He works every day. My husband who has bladder cancer. My friend who had a double stroke and who did everything she was supposed to—eats right, exercises daily, and worships God and helps her fellow men. So long a list I have. I am so thankful to have a caring God to help with all of this.

  • Pam

    I think this is a daily occurrence and struggle for most parents! I try to just sit back and let them do their own thing, make their own mistakes, etc., but it is difficult to see them fail.

  • Barbara Marrin

    I desperately want a full and joyfilled life for my daughter. She has chosen friends that are not positive in her life. She has made life choices so far that have caused her grief and pain. I’m praying that God will move in her life in such a way that she will make more constructive life choices. I want her back to her former self before drugs entered her life.

  • Diana Hall

    I always wanted my husband to be closer to God and it happened. When our daughter got cancer a friend asked him to join their bible study group and he did. Said he couldn’t think of a good excuse not to go. He has been reading the bible every since. He talks to people all the time about God & reading the bible. For Christmas this year he gave our 3 daughters & 1 son-in-law, a bible. My 1 daughter told me the other day she was reading it. They have always lessened to their dad my then me. Lol

  • Andrea

    This is what I needed this day! I have been wanting my almost 18 year old son to say that he believes in God and wants to return to church but he is so far away and doesn’t even understudy concern or words. I have been trying so hard and sending him matthew Kelly’s videos any trying so hard to force him to be open.
    I have trying laying off and just excepting his choice to not believe but it been a struggle.
    I believe I as his mother want him to believe more than he wants to. So I will for his desire will increase and pray for a holy will. Please pray for my son and for me as well.

  • Kathy Kawa

    My adult boys were raised Catholic; me being a CCD teacher and all. They have “fallen” off the path so to speak, but are truly great people. The conduct themselves worthy and I couldn’t be more proud of all 3 of them. My prayer is that they “find” again the church.

  • Cheryl DeMott

    My heart is heavy today for my Grandson who carries so much anger that he lashes out at his sister and brother. I know him as such a gentle young man that it breaks my heart to hear and see what he has become. I ask for your prayers for him and his family and thank you for what you and the Matthew Kelly team does for us.

  • Joy Dauterman

    I have and when they didn’t see it, it was frustrating. Patience, love and prayer is all you can do. Showing God’s love is the best way to show anyone how they could be the best version of themselves. I know I need that from others as well since I’m not perfect.

  • Linda

    God, I can’t imagine the happiness you want from me… losing my son my only child, is the hardest thing in the world. The only peace I get is that you needed him more than me. But don’t understand . Just give me the strength to understand 🙏

    • Jeanne

      Praying for you, Linda. I can’t even begin to imagine what you are going through. God bless you on your journey for peace.

      • Linda

        Thank you Jeanne, I appreciate that.

    • SanctusSanctus

      In a similar situation, I’m thinking of not understanding, but of “trusting” the God whose hand I can not hold in the physical sense? (My soul magnifies the Lord; my spirit rejoices in God my Savior” and then she’s at the foot of the Cross)…. We’ve a Mother who prays for us too….

  • Jeanne

    I struggle with this A LOT! Being a parent, I am constantly wanting what is best for my children. It is not that I am wanting them to be someone they are not. I just want them to be the best they can be! I want them to have the desire to be the best they can be. I know that they can accomplish anything if they put their minds to it. How do I get them to realize that and desire that?

  • Maddalena

    I can so relate to this as a parent as a citizen of earth. So many times I want something for my kids that I feel they need or someone in my Parish but God always has a way of reminding me that He has our back.

  • Julia Oaks

    I, too, am saddened at all the people in our families and world today that do not have God as the center of their lives. There are so many that have left the church and their beliefs. I am praying for all who have these concerns. Please pray for my family as well. Jesus I trust in you. Blessings to all of you.

  • Marti

    Loved reading all the response. Great parenting.

  • Tom K

    Yes a lot of the time though I find I want good things for others more than they may want it; and then realize also it is something I am not doing or wanting for myself. Maybe to heal a relationship that they need to but then can look at myself and see I am not doing the same. Along the lines of do as I say not as I do…. .

    • Jacqueline Shukla

      I agree with you, Tom. God is using our desire to help others to help us. I think that the more I develop my prayer life with God the more often I discover this “gift from God”. In Matthew 7: 3-5 Jesus tells us to remove the plank out of our own eye before we try to remove the speck from our neighbor’s eye. Prayer lets me become aware of how I need to improve myself. And helps me to strive to model the Gospel with actions instead of just words.

      • Tom K

        Well said….

  • Rebecca

    I am in a serious relationship and before I started dating my boyfriend, I told him I want to marry someone Catholic. He had never gone to church or even thought of himself being religious. We have been together 3 years now and he has come quite a long way. He has made the decision to take the RICA classes and become Catholic next year. I am afraid though that the only reason he is doing it is for me. I want him to feel the power of God’s love and fully commit to the Catholic faith. I pray for him every day and hope that he will feel closer to God and the Catholic faith.

  • Daniela D.

    As a parent I go through this feeling of wanting something good for my kids a lot more than they want it for themselves. Love hurts, but prayer is the answer.

  • Susan Boyer

    I am a health coach and I help people not only lose weight, but focus on healthy habits for a lifetime of Optimal Health. And I see the benefits of a healthy lifestyle, but a lot of my clients focus on “dieting” which is temporary, instead of developing daily habits that lead to the good health they desire. I think this is the same for us on our Heavenly journey, instead of focusing on the daily habits that lead to closeness to Christ, we pick and choose what we like or don’t like about the journey. Christ never said it would be easy and He is calling us to be with Him, So we often “diet” on the things that will take us to that closeness to Christ instead of developing the lifestyle that will lead us to our Heavenly home.

  • Peggy

    A priest gave me some wonderful advice. Pray Psalm 139. Once for yourself, and then pray for the person you wish could find God’s peace. Substitute their name for I. It has helped me let go and let God.
    Do I grab it back? Yes, but less and less all the time.

  • Bryan Cunningham

    How often I have wanted something good for someone else because I cared about them and loved them. But I could not make them do the good or accept the good I so wanted for them. So I had to wait. That’s hard. It was also hard for me when I could not se that others wanted good for me. I felt isolation verging on despair. Then they had to wait on me and just hope. God is patient, kind and generous. And sometimes I ignore him

  • David Crowley

    A great priest once taught me a prayer that I was reminded of when watching Matthew. “I want to want what You want”. A profound yet simple prayer that captures our desire to be more in touch with God’s plan for us.

  • Carol

    Wanting more for a family member or a friend more that they want for them selves is a act of love! It takes a lot of faith and prayers. It’s especially hard if the person does not see the beauty that they hold in their hearts that God can see in them!

  • JayAW

    One of my brothers had incredible musical talent. He could sit down at a piano and bring tears to your eyes when he played. But, he was also an alcoholic and chose to do hard manual labor instead, which eventually left him injured and unable to work due to his body breaking down when he got older. Our mom told the story many times about how his piano teacher bragged that he would be a big musician one day. He just had that God given talent of music and my mom wished and prayed that he would pursue music as a career. But, the bottle had too much of a grip on him and he would only play the piano sporadically. He wasted his God given talent, but it was really the evil one that convinced him that he wasn’t really that good and that he should settle for hard labor and drinking instead. How the evil one blinds us, like he did to my brother.

  • Marla

    My husband was in the Vietnam war, after his death in 2011, I met his Sargeant. In some of our conversations he told me he didn’t believe in God because how could God let so many innocent lives be taken in such a worthless war. My husband and him were together 24/7 for a year. When he did come home he found out his wife was having a baby and in love with someone else. So he went through a divorce also. So his view of a loving God was tarnished beyond salvage. I’ve tried to talk with him but he says he doesn’t want to discuss it. I pray for him to find his path back to Jesus and for him to find happiness. In a way I thought that God wanted me some how to help him but I can’t seem to be able to break through to him. We now only talk for a moment at the military reunions. It saddens me to see him holding on to such a powerful resentment. Please pray for him, and pray for me to be able some day to reach him and show him what a loving God we do have. I did get an extra Resisting Happiness book and wanted to send it to him. And Let God take over from there?

  • Kathy

    I too want wonderful things for my niece and two nephews who have strayed far from God. Please pray for Kristen, Joseph and Michael. I will pray for everyone here also!

  • Linda R

    My husband joined the church when we married 40 years ago. Unfortunately I’ve seen over the years that he did this only for me. He is a wonderful person but has never let God enter his heart. He does not attend mass with me nor receive the sacraments. I’ve prayed for a long time that he would find the complete joy that I do in Christ. Lately, I’ve come to the realization that HE has to want this. Please pray that he comes to know and worship Christ. He doesn’t realize how much richer our life together would be.

    • SanctusSanctus

      Here’s the good news: those of us in marriage have entered a “covenant” which is Christ-centered.
      So when one spouse (of this 3 person marriage) is out of touch shall we say, two are still in union praying for the spouse “asleep”…. And so we can’t see the God who’s Hand has us, yet we continue to believe, trust, and not “worry”. I pray for all the persons in the same situation and hoping you join in that effort too!
      We are so loved by God. I pray you feel that right now.

      • Linda R

        Thank you for your words. You’ve definitely given me a new perspective. I will continue to pray for my “asleep” partner.

  • Alex

    I want my 16 year old brother to feel happiness, peace, and have the motivation to seek out education beyond his high school years. I am 25 and often feel that instead of giving him support, I adopt a parent-like role and it helps no one and makes him even more distant. I worry about his future and I’m asking for all of your prayers today.

    • Cathie Anastas

      Alex, I pray that God gives you the insight and self discipline to be a “brother” and NOT a parent. He’ll respond to your love and advice much sooner!! I know; I’ve been there. It’s a hard role to let go of. Maybe every day you can do smthg symbolic (like write your desire for your brother on a piece of paper) and put it in front of a cross /statue of Mary/ particular Saint. And then trust that God wants it even MORE for your brother, and HE has the power to bring this about. And He will…once you let God work in him. It will free you up to just hang with your brother & enjoy who he is today. You are Christ’s body here on earth; we have to use ourselves to love/ act as He did. He meets us where we are….He doesn’t wait for us to be something better (like a college student). Your brother WILL continue on God’s path; he has you as an EXAMPLE AND hopefully as a brother. God is our alligator FATHER; He’s all too happy to “parent” your brother!
      Pray. (for me too, if you will, to let go more, and to trust in God ) 🙏

      • Cathie Anastas

        *ultimate Father

      • Cathie Anastas

        One last thing. A priest often reminded me of an old Portuguese saying, “God writes straight with crooked lines.” In other words, our paths are seldom linear, but He can lead any/all of us to Himself Even tho we get off track at times.

  • Dorothy Cabral

    I have a friend who has so much potential but lacks confidence in herself. I have spent numerous amounts of time trying to get her to improve herself and live life to the fullest but I realize know that no matter how much I want something for her it doesn’t matter because she needs to want it for herself

  • Barb

    My brother has decided there is no God because of all the evil in the world. He is a propronet of creationism now. He was raised Catholic, sent his children to Catholic school. I can’t imagine how this happened other than Satans influence.
    I pray that God will open his eyes and that he will be open to receiving/ believing again.

  • Karen

    Yes. I want my adult children and two adult siblings to return to the church. I pray for it every day but know that all I can do is pray, plant seeds, and trust God. That can be a helpless feeling but when I realize that I do trust that God loves my family more than I do, I get peace. I just have to keep reminding myself of God’s love and persist in prayer.

  • Harry

    Brothers and Sisters….”you can take the horse to the stream but you can’t force it to drink water.” If so Jesus would’ve remained in Jerusalem till everyone was converted. Teach by example and acknowledge your own missteps. The rest is up to God and the individual. Even when the road is rough seek the Lord for strength and you will always be the lamp on the hill. God is love.

  • Bruce Waguespack

    In am so hard on myself and it makes me feel like a total loser sometimes. When I think about those things that make me feel like a loser, they really don’t matter one bit in the eyes of God. he is truly my best fan an I need to accept His love and mercy as unconditionally as He loves me!!

  • Maria

    Lori, when I was reading your story, I felt like I was reading my own. I perfectly understand you because I am having the same situation with my boys and I feel like I failed too. Matthew, helped me to open my eyes, and really trust in God because to be realistic I can’t do anything, but pray hard and trust God with my heart and soul.

  • Karen

    My 18 year old son is an addict. I want nothing more than him to be happy, healthy and safe. He is none of those. He has also decided their is no God. If he could just see that God wants him to be happy maybe he could find the strength to get help to get sober.

  • Cate

    Jesus Help me embrace your dream for me. That really struck me in the prayer. It sounds so much more detailed and intimate then I usually think of when thinking of Gods wants for me. As a parent we are so involved in the big and little things in our children lives so it somehow makes more sense with today’s reflection includes God in all aspects of our lives big or small with wants for me. it feels bothersome sometimes to ask God for his help in minor things or the mundane but I guess that resistance really puts limits on what Jesus wants for me. Pray I can truly open up to receive that dream.

  • Mike

    My son is on the autism spectrum and my daughter is prone to depression. I watch each of them struggle in their own way with these challenges. I just want to somehow hold them and comfort them and let them see how beautiful and special they are. I want them to have confidence and peace in their hearts. Until now, I have never really thought of this being God like.

  • Paula Stone

    Are you all bitter is that the reason you wear black consistently when I am around? I am almost 60 is it my age, rejection of authority figure or just damn angry that I am black African American advanced degreed product of a 2 parent home?
    Meanwhile on a universal note included in each lesson needs to be the single adult with no family of their own who need this ministry to not feel excluded isolated or alone.

  • Joanne

    My children don’t go to church anymore. I so want them to get to know God again

  • Gerard

    I sure do want more for my family, children and grandchildren to the point of depression, worry and anger. I pray daily to get rid of these especially the anger but they’re still present. I am having a hard time with this but I know God has His plans and I will accept whatever He gives me. I know it’s is the best for me!

  • Becky Arpin Paque

    Absolutely. My son has completely turned away from the church and my daughter is not going either, therefore she is not taking my granddaughters. I want it for them so badly and pray for them to have that desire every day!

  • Jan

    As a mom

  • Mercedes Cedeno

    Yes, for my children. I as their mother can truly see so much they can offer to others and be better than who they are; but I too can see as a DRE the uniqueness of the kids in faith formation; see how they can bring out their talents . Hearing Matthew Kelly say that God feels just that for me I feel that I need to be a better person be the best of myself and to know that he is there for me just seems to give me confidence. One always wants what’s better for others. One has to put Christ in the center of one’s life. I try, I struggle it isn’t easy because of the way one is but one can with God to being there for us.

  • Mario Cannariato

    This seems to come to the forefront with my sons Young men 32&28 yrs old that have left the church and Jesus. I pray each day that they come back to the fold knowing that all I can do is continue to be an example of Gods love.

  • Erin Saunders

    I think I want that all the time for my kids. It almost hurts. But, this has opened my eyes to the grace God gives me to continue loving me even though I’m making mistakes. He doesn’t become frustrated. He’s patient. I need that lesson and reminder sometimes in how I love others.

  • Jan

    As a mom, there are lots of things I desire for my husband & daughter. But…when I’m being completely honest, many of these desires are a result of my own pride. I want them to be successful to prove myself as a mother and wife. As I grow older, I’m astonished at how often the sin of pride comes up. It’s a sin that wasn’t on my radar for most of myself. I’m an ordinary housewife. I considered prideful sinners to be impressive, haughty, extraordinary people who had to temper their gifts, talents, and blessings. But pride lurks in me – behind my desires…behind my anxieties. And it’s dangerous. Pride was the fall of Satan. So daily I pray over this struggle in my life.

    • Mary B.

      Wow Jan -that’s tough to admit! My desires for my children are also ridden by my “own pride”! I have to realize that I need to give my children their own free will, and not what I desire for them to make me feel like a “good parent”. I am learning to empower and trust their decisions and hopefully this will boost their confidence and trust in me! Thanks for your post and making me aware!!

  • Marygrace Almleaf

    So grateful for this Lenten study ❤ my son is in recovery, and I have surely wanted it more for him than he did for himself. I thank God, the Lord Jesus, and the Holy Mother for his recovery and for the protection and tender mercy afforded our family.

  • Clara Turci Depko

    I have a friend who will not let hurt go. My friend is dying and I want this so much for her. I have a mass said every month for this person. Praying God prepares her for her death I know there can be a healing not physical but healing this I want more then they want.

  • Marian Kaye Harvey

    I have somewhat of a different perspective on this lesson. For years I hated myself for grievous sins I had committed. Yes,I went to Reconciliation and received forgiveness from the priest. I thought I had forgiven myself but years later I was plagued with deep remorse and an unforgiving spirit so much that I constantly thought of taking my very life.
    Along the same belief that God wants to give me much happiness God also wants me to receive His forgiveness.
    Only, by God’s grace did a miracle happen to cause me to realize and finally accept and receive God’s “white robe of rightousness” in exchange for my dirty rags at the foot of the cross!!! My service doggie, a small white poodle and I went outside of our apartment right at the moment that 2 faith based individuals came up alongside us and started telling me they had been sent by God to me. They asked me to reach deep inside of my heart and share with them what was hurting me so deeply. I shared with them the deep ever present sorrow for my sin. They prayed over me, bringing me emotionally to the cross of Jesus Christ, laying my sin at the foot of the cross and then wrapping myself with a white, gleaming robe of righteousness. At some point they left and I just stayed with my Lord and Savior. To this day if I ever try to pick up the filthy rags of my past I recall this and thank God Almighty for His deep abiding love for me and remind myself God has given to me this precious gift of forgiveness and squeeze my white robe of righteousness closer to my heart!!! I do believe that those 2 individuals were “living saints/angels” sent to me by Almighty God Himself!!! Thank you for letting me share my life story!!! Kay

  • Kathy

    I can relate to all the comments. I have a son and daughter who were raised Catholic and they have lost their faith. I feel in someway I let them down. They are both struggling with different issues right know and I really wish they would turn back to God. I know now that I cannot force them all I can do is pray and trust that God will take care of them. Please pray for them

  • Jo Anne

    I remember when my late son John wanted a certain music player but I picked out a much better model for him… I could not convince him so I let have the one he chose….. He could have had such a better player if he listened to me….. Sometimes that is how we are with God….. If we would just listen to Him!

  • Mary

    I pray for our son Mike to come back to God and our faith. Please pray for him.

  • Paula

    It is with heavy heart that I write about my son turning his back on God. He is so confused and stubborn. He claims that there “may” be a creator, but not God. He thinks all religions have it wrong. He thinks at death, our bodies just vaporize and of course there is no soul. Any discussions we have go no where. My daughters, husband and myself have recommended books, even bought them for him, videos to watch, articles on the internet and movies “God is Not Dead”. Everything is met with some resistance. I try to live and remember that God wants him to return more than I do, and that gives me some peace. My prayers for him become emotional. Please join me in praying for my son, Kyle. I will pray for all your loved ones to come back to Our Good God.

    • Beth

      Our son, 16….has been in the same spot…in and out, for awhile. He goes to Mass, and Steubenville conferences….mostly to please us ( we are the volunteer youth coordinators). I thank him for going with us …. And use all of my strength to not nag about his level of participation. I remind myself that in going to please us he is obeying God’s comand to honor his parents. After years of anxiety and hand wringing my response now is to love him deeply, rejoice in all the good in him, keep praying and trust God. I was concerned about him approaching the Eucharist and a wise and trusted priest advised that my son doesnt know what he believes right now and that Jesus in the eucharist is just what he most needs to help him figure it out. I unite my prayers with all offered here that our children know God’s love and that we all are transformed by It!
      In solidarity….

      • Mog

        I love that Priests advice, I question if my daughter should receive communion, on the odd occasion she goes to Mass. I don’t mention it to her. Thank you for sharing.

  • Beth

    Yes! I love that this tendency is considered “God-like”. I don’t love …that rather than sit with this desire for my children and gently coaching them, my response is very not “Godlike”. I get frustrated as i push, pull, prod them to “do better”and they can experience this as me withdrawing my love. This Lent I am focusing on trusting His love for my family. I am ” borrowing” it to give to them …. Trying to open my heart to His love and pour It out for them. His love transforms them (and me) into who He created them to be. Sometimes my love pushes them to be like me😁. The world needs each of us as we were created to be…. Not more poorly developed versions of “Beth”. One “best version” is the goal.
    I am so very thankful for this BLE! Our parish begins the conversation tomorrow. Please pray for us!

  • Kathy

    Yes, our son and daughter in law claim to want a family and she has trouble carrying a baby. She has had three miscarriages, but won’t see a specialist. It is as if they want a family but not enough to do what it takes to make that happen. They would be great parents and have so much to offer. It is so hard to watch, but it is so not my business. I don’t want them to regret this later. I know it is in God’s hands, but in today’s world their is so much that can be done medically to help them. Time is running out for them. I tell myself all the time that I am not in control and that God is and knows best what is good for them.

  • Maria

    I have nieces and nephews with whom I want to share many lessons I’ve learned in my life. At the same time, I realize that I don’t have a lot of experience talking to kids and even if I did, they may not consider all that I have to say b/c they’re still in the process of figuring things out themselves…and also they’re kids and get distracted by stuff I now consider, as a grown-up, pretty superficial. They’re still pretty young. I’m hoping that over time I’ll learn better how to talk to them about the things that matter to me.

  • Toni

    i am struggling with my adult daughter and decisions she has made. I know she is not happy, but I know I can’t sit her down like she is 10 and tell her to play nice!! God is good, I just need to put him in charge and I have not fully done that all the time .

  • Becky Craig

    The answer is a resounding yes! My daughter (30 yrs. old) suffers from time to time with anxiety and panic attacks. She often turns to me during these times. I grateful for this but I see that she can be so hard on herself, so unforgiving. She really can be her own worst enemy. And she does not have God is her life right now. I just pray that He will find a small crack in her heart to begin kneading and softening it.

  • Faith Barton

    Just reading all of the comments, it’s hard to imagine why so many people would turn away from God. I will pray that God will answer everyone’s prayers. This Lent, I think that if we all pray the prayer of Faith, God will answer our prayers as he sees fit.

    First of all, to answer the question, I see myself constantly rejecting the good plans God has for my own life!!!! I just keep falling because of a lack of trust or willpower. But I pray that God does something good in my life this Lent, which, He already has.:)

    Please pray for relationships in the family. Much of it has to do with extreme unforgiveness and hurt. To top it off, some of them have rejected the Church, which has also caused strain. But we cannot give up because God will bring them back.

  • Dana Webskowski

    This video helped me today! I want my daughters who have left the Catholic Church for non-denominational churches to come home. I can’t do it for them. I can pray for open hearts and for God to lead them back. Jesus I trust you! Please pray for all who have left the church to come home. Thank you Dynamic Catholic.
    Dana

  • Steve

    About 5 years ago I had a tremendous experience in Confession where the priest invited me to return monthly to the Sacrament. It has been life changing!!

    I want my wife, children and all of you to know the joy and grace of encountering the King of Mercy frequently in a good Sacramental Confession!

    All Praise God!!

  • Bev

    I have a daughter who is nonjudgmental and tends to see the goodness in people regardless of the physical appearance. Since she went away to college, she has totally changed her religious views. She now tells me she’s an atheist. I pray daily for God to help her get back to believing in Jesus Christ.

  • Elise Bosch

    Yes, for my son. He has Asperger’s Syndrome and at 24 is still stuck in being unable to motivate himself. He just lost his job due to too many “sick” days. If he doesn’t feel like getting up, he calls in sick.

    Getting him to actually get out and apply for a new job, even online is tough. He gets SSI for a living allowance, but that really only allows him to just get by, with bare subsistence. He could be so much more. I definitely want a job for him more than he does.
    I just keep praying for him.

  • Virginia Garcia

    I have always been a practicing Catholic and always felt God’s presence in my life. However ,this past year I have grown so much spiritually and feel so incredibly blessed that God is now at the forefront of everything I do. There are days when I stumble and struggle but overall I have learned to put my trust in HIM more than ever before. I am a Roman Catholic but have been waking up to the Word every morning with Joyce Meyer , who is one of the most inspirational figures on tv and radio today . The pastor in my church at Saint Helens in Westfield has created such a climate of love and discipleship that I feel at home in Church more than ever before . I have joined small groups to learn more, share more and be more (of an active member) . That shift in focus from work , money, and material things to God, church, and love for others has changed me for the better and in such incredible ways that fill me with an intense happiness no one or anything can take away! If I knew then what I know now , so many years of tears , loneliness and suffering could have been avoided . I know there is a reason this awakening happened when it needed to and In GOD’s time but when I think of all the people that don’t have what I have and don’t know what I know and feel what I feel in God, it breaks my heart! I see the worry and anxiety in their faces. I see their lack of direction. I see their hopelessness. I see their desperation. So many people are searching ! That used to be me. And I want so much for people to know God. I want so much for them to experience God in there every day life and enjoy all the blessings he has prepared for us here on earth , not just in Heaven. He does want so much for us to be happy and he gave us all the tools that we need to be so. We just have to open our eyes, open our ears, and open our hearts to Him and everything else will fall into place. It’s so simple. It’s so easy to attain. We complicate it and make it difficult. As Matthew Kelly says, “we resist it”. I pray for everyones Family members and friends listed above that they may come to share in this blessing of knowing God and accepting his grace. Keep praying, keep being an example so that when they see you they see the power of what God can do. God bless you all !

    • Mary B.

      You are very blessed Virginia – such words of wisdom!!

  • Nancy Britt

    Every day. I think I want more for my sons than they want for themselves. They are teenagers and I see the potential to be so successful if they can just persevere through the tough times and use the resources available to them and the skills/strategies they have been taught. I get extremely frustrated when they don’t and sometimes, I see it as my failure. I own it instead of them. I continuously struggle with that. Since I do, I tend to enable them by taking control and “fixing” their difficulties or helping too much. I know I need to step back and remember that mistakes are how we learn and that my vision for them might not be their vision. I will continue to pray for them and for me, that we may all have the strength to walk through life’s journey with God has our leader and always have the faith in him that we need. God bless everyone on their journey, too!

    • Mary B.

      I think we all struggle with this as parents in this generation! Pray and faith is definitely the answer!!

  • Christine Schoen Brusoe

    I am a victim of clergy abuse. I have found my way back to the church but 3 of my 4 children have given up their faith. I feel responsible because I let them become aware of it. I pray with all my heart that they come back home to their faith

  • Sue Goulet

    My nephew has alienated himself from his whole family. It breaks my heart because he came from a loving household. There is such evil at work in his heart.

    • JayAW

      Sue, maybe there was something going on in that household that you’re not aware of. Until you live with someone under the same roof, you can’t make judgements towards your nephew and why he has alienated himself from his whole family. There’s probably more there than you are aware of.

      • Sue Goulet

        I did make my comment short and leave out a lot of detail, which I won’t share. I am very close to the whole family and I know all of the dynamics. I just hope someday they can get past them. Thanks for your concern for him, I stay neutral and love all of them.

  • Patricia Kissinger

    Lots of times….especially with my six children. I find this desire for the good to be even stronger for my children now that they’re pretty much all adults. I so badly wish my 29 year old would quit smoking for his health’s sake. I pray that my children will come back to the Church since none of them are attending the Catholic Church any longer. As a Mother, this is one of my biggest “hurts.” I raised my kids as Catholics, but none of them are practicing Catholics. My consolation is that every one of them are good, loving, and generous human beings who would do anything for anyone. My other consolation is trusting God’s Will.

    • JayAW

      Patricia, I grew up in a strict Catholic home. My mom especially was all about the church. Growing up like that, it was overbearing to the point where church wasn’t a choice, but mandatory. Think about doing something you WANT to do versus something you HAVE to do because your parents demand that you do it. I left the church for about 10 years because of this. Church was something that was forced on me and I was tired of seeing those one hour Catholics each week that put on a holier than thou veil when they were in church but sure had no problem using God’s name in vain as soon as they were outside of the church. There is so much hypocrisy with Catholics because many think that they are so righteous for going to church and look down on those that don’t. So many people leave the church for that reason and I was one of those people. This broke my mom’s heart but I felt like the church wasn’t practicing what it preached. I eventually came back to the church after I moved to another city. I’m not a perfect Catholic but who is? I’m a sinner and I try to do better with my life. Your kids will come back to the church, but it has to be on their terms. To them, going to church was your choice for them, not theirs. It may take years or even decades but God will stir something in them to bring them home. As a parent, it may hurt you that your kids aren’t going to church, but remember that you may be one of the reasons for this. Let them realize on their own why they need the church back in their life again.

      • Patricia Kissinger

        I agree with most of what you said, except for one part. I don’t believe I am the reason they don’t go to church. I wasn’t the kind of Mom or Catholic who beat their kids with a Bible. I am considered to be a moderate Catholic. I taught the kids about the Catholic Church and yes, I did require them to attend Mass on Sundays and Holy Days…..just like I required my kids to eat their vegetables if they wanted dessert. As parents, we do what we believe is best for our children. After high school, they made their own decisions concerning Catholicism and religions in general. They have exercised their Free Will, the gift that God gave to them and to all of us.

        • JayAW

          It may be that you didn’t beat your kids with the Bible, but there might be something else that you did without knowing it. I don’t know what that was since I didn’t grow up in your home, obviously, but maybe you could have explained more of the importance of participating in the mass. Or maybe you wanted everyone in church to see how you were such a good Catholic for making sure your kids were there, which reflected that you’re a good mother. I’m speculating, of course, and I’m not pointing the finger at you as the sole reason why your kids don’t go to church any longer, but you were probably a part of the reason. Like with me, my mom was so worried that everyone would see her as a bad mother of me and my brothers weren’t there in church with her. It was less about us and more about her pride and ego. “What’s everyone going to think?” is what she would say. I’m just saying that there’s probably something that you don’t even realize that you did and your kids are rebelling since they are now adults and don’t have to follow your rules anymore.

          • Patricia Kissinger

            I’m sorry, JayAW, but I’m not your mother. You have no idea who you are talking to, but instead are projecting your life experiences onto me. Pride was never a consideration when it came to going to church. I was raised to attend Mass and didn’t necessarily enjoy it when I was a child, but as I grew and matured I could see the benefits. So, I did the same thing for my children. Expected them to attend Mass for their own good hoping that they would experience the benefits of it as they got older. I hope you find happiness in your life.

    • Mary B.

      A priest once said to me these comforting words, ” God has a plan for your children, trust is His plan” I hope these words are comforting to you as well!!

  • Candida Rosario

    In the last 4 years or so my life has been centered around my children’s wellbeing. I had a case with my now 20 year old son that made me immerse myself into prayer. He turned 17 and thought he knew better than anyone. He surrounded himself with bad influences, bad habits, and he disrespected his family greatly. I felt at war with the devil and I never stop praying. My son is now a US Marine and is doing much better. I thank God for never leaving me, I thank our mother Mary for being there with me. I am trying very hard to hear God’s message for me every day. I am trying to look for God in everything that I do and will continue to do so. My children are now finding their way so what’s next for me? What will be my mission? I know it is to do God’s will and I will continue to search for his message.

  • Valerie

    Lord bless my deeply desire to see my husband and my son fully commited to you! I know Lord that you don’t cross the line…but I also know that you don’t abandon your children and you keep knocking the door of their hearts! Amen

    • Mary B.

      Very well put!!! Thank you

  • senneville

    Yes, oh yes. I desire more than anything for my dear friend to return to the sacraments, to return to full communion with The Church. But I know that for this to happen she must desire it first and foremost. And so I pray for God to implant that desire in her and to give me the strength to not give up.

  • Peggy

    Yes, I Have crossed that line of doing for them and thinking I know what’s best for my grandchildren. I am always trying to fix things, make things easier for them, which of course never turns out. I have been working very hard to “Let Go & Let God”. I ask everyone to pray for me so I can stop crossing the line.

  • Rachael Anderson

    I find as a parent of 3 teens and mentor for several youth . I often feel I want so much more for them than they want for themselves. It breaks my heart sometimes that they cannot see their own beauty and God given gifts and talents. I know God wants so much more for them. The key in this segment for me is to pray for their DESIRE to see what God sees in them. The DESIRE to build a stronger relationship with Christ. The DESIRE to be their best self as well as the DESIRE to be my best self. Thank you Dr. Kelly for the word of wisdom.

  • Theresa Purington Freeman

    Yes, as a mother, sister, daughter, wife, friend, neighbor, physical therapist and health coach everyday. Empowering others is the keystone and the challenge. Thank you for sharing!

  • BJ Jarvis

    My best friend of 10 years was/is a cradle Catholic. She’s always wanted to be a nun but got denied . Once was because she takes medication and another because she has depression. If God loves everyone the same why would she be denied her…Calling? This lady is more than a nun to me. She is on her way to being a Saint! She has saved a life or two when her friend was overcome by major despair! Thank you God for this Saint in desguise. What a nun she could have been. Too bad!

  • Mary

    My youngest son, age 51, doesn’t seem to have grown up. His wife walked out of his and their son’s lives 3 years ago and left the state. My son works 12-hr shifts and on weekends attends concerts. Doesn’t leave much time for his son who is 14. He has now rekindled a relationship with a ‘friend’ from 20+ yrs ago who now lives with them. She is fresh out of rehab and I feel adds another issue that he needs to address. Making matters worse, he doesn’t attend church, my grandson has not made first communion, nor been encouraged to attend any church. It doesn’t seem I can do anything about it but pray. Hopefully, God will find a way to touch them and bring them home.

  • Alice Ann Hengesbach

    Good morning … again: choice, free will. To go beyond the wanting/the desire to to engage in behavior that is not necessarily healthy (co-dependency). If I remember to focus on my life, to ask myself “Am I putting God at the center of this decision” and to trust God’s ability to touch the other soul … all will be well. To want good for others is compassionate thought/behavior and to fixate/obsess on this “want” is arrogant and disrespectful.

  • Shannon L Seeber

    I am that way all the time..as I am a wife and mother as well as I a in-home daycare provider. And I want that all the time for my husband,son and the children that I watch during the day. But I have a hard time remember that God wants me to do the right thing and also love myself and not set limited for me and if something bothered me don’t beat myself up about it so much.

  • Sarah Pritchett

    Yes,, my daughter. She continually chooses to make bad choices, and doesn’t believe us when we tell her she is better than those choices and she is smart. It’s easier for her to believe all of the negative stuff. We know she can get better grades, we know how special she is. We’d love for her to believe it too.

  • C.p.

    Yes St MONICA prayed for years her son was “St “. Augustine.

  • Anthony Maida Jr.

    I will pray for your brother Anita,I have a brother with the same thing.
    Please pray for my brother also.God Bless

  • Kim Stanton

    I can really relate to this topic. As a manager and as an association director I struggle with wanting and expecting my staff and my volunteers to see what I see. This feeling brings out my impatient side and sets me up for disappointment often when they do not see what I see.
    I would welcome any guidance.

  • Jodi Wilkie

    Of course! My oldest son doesn’t want God in his life. He wants to follow his own will. He’s 17 and thinks I force God on him. I want him to know the true love of God and to choose to follow him. I want my son to love the Lord Jesus with all his heart, all his soul, all his mind, and all his strength.

  • William Y.

    Yes, my brother, age 57 died last month due to resistance to taking care of himself by not taking his medication and possible drug and alcohol abuse. It was hard at first for us to let go, but we feel God’s mercy and forgiveness healed him “at the hour of his death”. Thanks to all the great people at DC for your prayers and support.

  • lyanz

    Yes often! But most for our son to come back to the church and get his marriage blessed and his children baptized!

  • Joan

    Joan
    I want to thank everyone who has joined the discussion. It has helped me to open my heart to others stories. We each have our own crosses to bear when it comes to being the better version of ourselves, whether it is helping a loved one understand his or potential or working towards our fulfillment. I find strength each and every day hearing your voices.

  • Geordie

    Honestly, I am struggling with this one. I like what Alice Ann wrote. I like to watch the videos, say the prayer, then read the reflections. I like how Matthew Kelly describes God’s true love for us and how God never crosses the line. I can say I want something more than someone but how do I know? My want may be a selfish want. Maybe that someone wants it just as much, if not more, than I do. I want to put God at the center of my life and decisions every day.

  • Jo

    Yes my daughter dated a fabulous man who left her beyond the moon and back for seven years they married and within a year she left him I don’t understand why she could not understand how beautifully she was blessed with so many blessings he would’ve provided a beautiful life for her

  • Brenda Moran

    What a beautiful, saving reflection today and blessed group! Thank you and RD thank you for sharing your devotion to our Blessed Mother and the strength of her intercession. When I read of Pope Francis devotion to Our Lady Undoer of Knots, I was led to her and have found great consolation and strength from saying this novena, asking for her intercession, to undo the knots in my life and in the lives of others. The day I truly accepted and embraced the truth that WE are His “Church”, that the Church is Our Lords followers here on earth, appointed by Our Lord Himself, was one of the greatest days of my life! When I look back now I realize that my misunderstandings , whether due to misunderstanding suffering , to not accepting a “Church rule” or anger about the hurt caused by the sinful behavior of a “Church” representative(s) religious and or layperson, found me seeing the Church as anything but the people ! All the result of my not spending time with Our Lord each day.
    A grateful follower
    ” …we pray to you to receive in your hands (name of person) and to free him/her of the knots and confusion with which our enemy attacks.” (from Pope Francis’prayer to Our Lady Undoer of Knots)

  • Julie Concannon

    Each day, my prayer is for my son who continues to resist the good in himself and being the best person he can be. I learned to forgive him and move on at a very early age.

  • Sue

    Thank you for reminding me of St Monica. She prayer for her son and was healed. All three of my children have turned away from there faith and my husband and I are heart broken. I pray all the time for them and believe in my heart that God has something better for them. I will keep you all in my pray and your children

  • Juanita Brewer

    My husband, and I and my family raised my 2 nieces and nephew. My sister was out of the picture for eight years. My mom and brothers first took on the job. Then my mom’s burn in the front area. I worked at the school and the principal was kind enough allow them to attend the school and we made it to high school. It was a hard process but satisfying. At this point, their mom wanted them to live with her and took the children back. We all wanted them best for them but two dropped out of school. The most amazing thing was the child who was in Special Education went to live with my brother and his wife. They worked with her, loved her and she graduated. She later married a good man and is a stay at home wife. The othe two got GEDs and and wored. One will be interviewing for a job with the airlines while the other in a delivery company. I wanted these two young adults with potential to attend college but this did not happen. I had to accept God’s love for them and when we speak and I feel great amount of love for them and towards all of us who did the best we could for them. We just had to give allow them to have free choice and have faith in God.

  • Rosemarie

    I had to laugh when I listened to today’s video because I was just thinking of this topic after watching yesterday’s video. I even wrote about it yesterday in my journal. My children are the first ones I thought about. I always want more for them then they want for themselves.

    Where I have always been confused with this topic is my being taught as I grew up that God is in control and ultimately what he wants for us will be. I understand and believe that things happen the way they are supposed to happen. This has gotten me through some tough times, where it helped me to keep my faith because I know it is always in God’s hands. So how does this relate to us being empowered to make our own decisions? Are we really making our own choices? Or do we make our own choices and learn from our mistakes once God has stepped in? I guess this comes back to what was said yesterday, that we need to put God in the center of our decisions and pray for his guidance in making the choices he’s empowered us to make. Is this right?

    • Mary B.

      Yes – fill the God hole and hopefully our children will follow in our footsteps to a happy life!!

  • Eileen

    In a totally different twist – when I listened to Matthew this morning – I immediately thought of the thoughts and emotions that have surfaced intensely in me, in friends and family, and in this nation this past year because of this election.
    I am passionate about human rights, civil rights, women’s rights – and the hate and fear I have seen in others has been a huge struggle for me.
    I believe my passions are because of my relationship with God …and have felt so much more connected to our Church because of our Pope.
    I used to be infuriated when called a bleeding heart liberal, a snowflake… but if I am those things – I know that it is ok- and I don’t have to defend it – and I can now I take the opportunity to listen and to understand …my energy cannot be put into trying to convince someone else to change – or worrying about their hate, their views- but my energy can be put to good use through prayer and surrounding myself with like minded people – and being the change I want to see in others.
    Free will hits home

  • Sad Mom

    I do want more for my adult daughters. I am very proud of them and who they are and most of the choices they make but I know they could be better. One has a faith life the other does not. It breaks my heart at what she and her family are missing out on with not inviting God into their marriage and family. I have learned over the years to trust in God that He will bring them to Himself. The time lost can never be regained. I pray daily for their conversion of heart.

  • Becky

    I am a junior high school teacher and I meet so many students that I worry about and pray for daily! I understand the element from which they come. Regardless of things out of my control, I turn to God daily (a little more than that this Lent) and ask for more understanding, patience, and love for these children.

  • Melissa

    For all the parents beating themselves up-stop. There is nothing you did wrong. Every individual has their own journey. I was away from the church when I was a teen & young adult-I thought my parents were “too religious” and often argued with them about God. Now I’m a mother of four beautiful children and we are all practicing Catholics including my husband who was never really a catholic.
    All you can do as a parent is LOVE and continue to be a light. Showing your children support and mercy even though they are on the wrong path is hard but necessary. Don’t give up. Lead by example, but don’t waste precious time worrying or arguing.

    • Ma

      Thanks Melissa, great to hear!! Bless you and your family ❤❤

    • Eileen

      That is my plan with my 13 year old, thanks for the validation! I and her father are just planting the roots, keeping her in our prayers, working to set a good example and owning up to the times when we don’t! She is loved and we make sure she knows it and feels it. The rest I have to leave in God’s hands, every day or I would be a wreck!

  • Sadie

    My daughter’s strength, wellness ,happiness and self esteem is what we have always wanted .
    Recently her spouse left her.
    We pray and pray for her happiness
    And her children.

  • Sarena

    I always want what is best for my sons. I am frustrated often, trying to get through to my middle child because I know there is so much he doesn’t see. He is 9 and he is an old soul. Listening to Matthew Kelly give the example of God’s parental love for us moved me. I want the best life for my children, God wants the best life for us. I pray that God will help me to stop resisting what God knows is best for me and my children.

  • Louann

    Yes, for my 26 year old son who continues down the path of destruction- drug addiction. I lost my fort born son to a drug overdose. We didn’t know at the time he even was using to the extent of overdose on a dare with a buddy to take more more Methodine pill (away at college and we get the call, he was found dead) Now, his brother is and has been an addict – facing felonies and multiple charges. In drug court now…so while out, he is not nor is this program helping. He isn’t helping himself. He has a precious son that is being raised by yes, the classic story…multiple grandparents. I want and pray he his healed, finds the strength in Jesus love before it’s too late. Thank you💔

    • Ma

      I’m so sorry for the pain you feel Louann. Let go and let God is hard to do, but as you already know, it’s all you can do 🙏🙏💕💕

  • Sandy G

    Yes for my teenage Sin to see his worth! How amazing he is! How capable he is in forfilling his goals and dreams! He doubts himself and I know he is more than capable! I pray that’s he learns it too!🙏

    • Sandy G

      Son

  • singit1

    My son is 26 and unemployed. He is a college graduate. He looks for work online, which for the most part, is the only way to find jobs. He applies to jobs every day. Yet he remains unemployed. He does have a number of part time jobs – like substitute teaching, and working at events for a photo booth company. I know he feels awful about living at home, having very little money, but I wonder why he doesn’t take an extra step forward and pursue some of the jobs for which he has applied by going to the companies in person, or making a phone call. I know he WANTS a real job, but he doesn’t seem to be able to make that extra effort. I see the sadness and sense his frustrations, but he needs to do more. I can’t apply to the jobs, or visit the companies, or make the phone calls, yet I know that I would. He needs to want this enough for himself to do it for himself.

  • Karla Perez

    Such irony for this to be the subject of our discussion today! Irony, because of what is going on in my life, my family life currently. About 2 years ago one of my mom’s sisters started going through a very difficult time emotionally & financially, and my family decided to lend a helping hand. My parents took her and her family along with their dog into our house. We were very much understanding of their situation and did it not expect anything from them, all we wanted was to lend a helping hand while they were ”establishing” themselves again. But, everything eventually back fired, needless to say there is no relation between her family and ours now. And even though we want the best for her and her family, even though we did everything in our power to convince her to get a job to be able to stand on her feet she refuses. She says she is not able to work because her stomach hurts, she says she will not work for some “lousy” job, and although we would love to help them, there comes the time that it is better to learn to let go. For the sake of our family and our psychological peace it is better to let go and let her live her live as she wishes. Sometimes it is better to separate yourself from toxic people, even if they are family, then to continue to hold one to something that doesn’t want to progress and get better.

  • Angie

    Andrea – I too have had my son (who is now 26) when he was in college tell me he wasn’t sure if there is a God. My other son (who is now 24) tells me doesn’t have time to go to Sunday mass. I talked about this several years ago with a young seminarian and he told me to pray that someone will come into each of my sons’ lives who will bring them back to the Church. He said it probably won’t be me and that is okay with me. A consolation that I feel everyday is knowing that all the good done by all of us, including my sons and your son, comes from the Holy Spirit.

  • Emily Beggs

    I’m 41 years old and just a few years ago, my husband and I suddenly opened our hearts more to understand where God wanted us to be. We weren’t raised in any specific religion or any spiritual path. We were lead to a small church down the road from where we leave and felt God’s hand place us. A year later we were baptized, experience First Communion and Confirmation at Easter. We’ve built a strong spiritual relationship within our family now. It doesn’t matter where you are in life – eventually God will nudge enough that you can’t help but here. For all those struggling wanting more for others, remember to “Let God . . .” – pray and put it in His hands.

  • Grant S

    For my brother to come back to the church. For years he has been straying away and I feel really guilty about it because I’m his confirmation sponsor.

  • Lee

    I also have a son who was raised Catholic who married outside the church who is now 36. His attitude is the same as Andrea’s son. The only thing you can do is pray and stay steadfast in your belief.

  • Mog

    Praying, wanting the best for my children, is my no.1 in life. I find it so helpful to go to Mothers Prayers each week. To put their names in the basket, at the foot of the cross & let go, leaving them with Jesus (or trying too).

  • Mindy

    I want good things for my family and friends all the time. Sometimes probably more they do. I want the best for them.

  • Norma Van Amberg

    Yes, my ex. When he left our marriage after 24 years, and multiple job and career changes, my parting words to him were that he would never find what he is searching for until he finds peace with himself and God.

  • Beatrice James

    I want a lot of things for a lot of people, but today I’d like to pray for 2 families. One of my cousins is struggling to keep his marriage and family together that he has had for 16 years. He claims his wife is going through the change that makes her want to cheat on him. I don’t get that. I told him that you can’t search for happiness outside yourself. It has to come from within and be grounded with God. I sent him the book Resisting Happiness, even though he is not Catholic, hoping it will help him with this struggle he is having. I was hoping he’d share it with his wife as well, but she’s too busy searching.

    The other cousin worries about everything under the sun and is addicted to alcohol. She has 4 beautiful children and is married to the father of her last one. She is not happy because all of her children were a surprise and unwanted. She didn’t get to party with her new body long enough to get it out of her system. I gave her the book Resisting Happiness as well but she hasn’t even opened it. She has no time with four children spanning from 6 months to 8 years old. When I asked her if she spends time with God, she says she has no time as well. So I started sending her a prayer everyday via text because she can read any other text I send. But all of my prayers are going on deaf ears and she no longer speaks that much to me. I’m praying she sees the light someday soon so that she can enjoy all of her blessings from God. That’s what all children are, little miracles.

    I have decided to let go and let God. I am not perfect and I am not the messiah. I just do my best to follow him because he has saved me so many times and has helped me through my struggles. I know who gets me through every second of my life and I start it with a daily devotion to my Almighty Father.

  • Kenya Crisantes

    Yes I have that struggle with my daughter constantly. Setimes it feels I can’t do anything to help her control her emotions. It hurts me but I know she is hurting even more. She is only 11 and I pray to God to give me the wisdom and the strength to be able to help her. Please pray for us

  • Denise

    Wow this has made me ponder for sure. Faith has always been a part of my life and my mom who was Orthodox showed me the love of God more than my dad….our daughter was close to mom and I had always thought had such deep faith . She married a man who is Hindu…married in a Hindu ceremony…has turned away from her Catholic roots because of all of the rules…and for other reasons I will not likely know. She maintains her belief in God, and teaches her children about God and Jesus…by somehow incorporating both faiths…though I wonder how this can be. I am wanting her to come back to the Catholic faith, though more than that I want to be able to teach my grandchildren our Christain faith….it all feels so strange…

  • Cindy Leslie

    I’ve always wanted the best for my mother, family and friends. But I get nowhere when it comes to changing them, ie, my sisters. My oldest sister won’t stop eating and her diabeties is getting worse. I want the best for her and don’t want her to die because of it. Talking to her and making any suggestions me and my family have goes in one ear and out the other. I’ve decided to put it in God’s hands. Please pray for my sister

  • Mike LaMagna

    I came to know the Lord when I was 30. Born into the family of God. I will be praying ur son will undsrstand the Lord clear and serve Him. Psalm 62 is a strong support for him and U. IJN

  • Debbie Maurseth Ishii

    I’m a retired medical assistant. The hardest part of my job was realizing that I could not make my patients want to be healthy. I could only give them the tools and encourage them. In the same way I have to remember it is God’s job to call those I love. My job is too love them and show the way. I also need to remind myself how often I still resist God on occasion. Some days Jonah and I have a lot in common.

  • Holly D.

    As parents sometimes “we think” we know what’s best for our children. However God has a better plan. I have found this out the hard way by harboring fear that my children would not achieve what’s best for them. This fear then turned into anger. It wasn’t until I realized that if I simply let go of my fears and gave them to God that things would turn out alright. So, that huge chasm in my heart that was once filled with fear and anger has slowly been replaced with God’s love and peace. And yes….some things regarding my children are not the way I would like them to be but instead of lashing out at them, I offer my concerns to the Lord and let God handle it. It works everytime…

    • Cherie Decker

      Amen

  • Theresa Yamasaki

    My daughter is homosexual/lesbian and we love her so much no matter what. She struggles much with this. She attends college at a private Jesuit Catholic school in Washington. She struggles with her classes and I tell her to just go to mass or to just go to the chapel and sit in silence w God for just 5 min. She says no and she won’t tell me why but I believe she thinks it’s bc she feels the Catholic Church won’t accept her bc of her choice of who she chooses to love. This saddens me deeply. I try to let go bc she has to figure this out and come to God on her own terms. I love her so much.

  • Sue

    My Grandaughter is in an abusive marriage. She has a three year old child. Her husband was on drugs and selling drugs. One time when he beat on her, he also knocked her sister to the floor. Her sister dialed 911. The husband was arrested, went to court and was told not to contact her for a year.
    Her mother, father, step-mother, and my husband and I along with others in her family begged her to divorce him. Hoping she would choose a better path for her daughter and herself.
    She let him back into her life after four months. She won’t answer the phone if her Dad calls. My husband wants nothing to do with her. I want to keep the lines of communication open. I really don’t know what is going on in her life. She protects him, by never saying what’s actually happening.
    Thank goodness for Facebook. At least when she posts pictures, I can make positive comments. I am so disappointed in her, but I refuse to kick her out of my life. She has so much potential.
    I loved Mr. Kelley’s example. It really made sense to me that God, who is perfect loves me even when I fail to live up to my potential. I totally get it now.

  • Laura LaDue

    As a parent, I found myself always wanting more for my kids than they seemed to want for themselves. One day my son said to me “Mom, you just want us to be perfect”. Of course this wasn’t true but I had to learn to back off and let them make their own choices – good or bad. Not an easy thing. They are both grown and happy. Not doing what I thought was the best version of themselves but that is their choice. I need to learn that they are happy and that’s enough.

  • Cherie Decker

    St. Monica pray for us
    St. Augustine pray for us
    Blessed Mother intercede for us

  • Carolyn

    As a parent, this is definitely something I struggle with. I want my daughter to learn from her actions but at the same time I want to spare her any pain. I know that she is a smart child who knows right from wrong and also knows loves God. I want so many things for her, but I also know that God is holding her in His loving hands and the best thing I can do is to pray for her.

  • Barb Stuart

    I was knodding my head as Dominic was talking, as a parent, I did that atleast a zillion times with my children and then I tried it with my grandchildren.At the ripe young age of 69,I finally stopped trying.I now am starting to listen more.I don’t like it but I know this is the way it is suppose to be. I guess I am a slower learner.They have the skills and the knowledge and the courage.I just give the hugs and the kisses and the love.

  • Paul

    To answer the question, Yes, I have. And like many of the posts listed prior to mine it is for each of my three children. They are all great kids and have made me proud many, many times. But I cant help wanting more for them , or wanting to help them when they are struggling. But it wasn’t until I watched mattthew’s video today, that I realized I am the one who is falling short in achieving everything God wants for me. That is where I should focus my attention.

  • Yolanda

    Every day when I watch m daughter ‘s struggle with school, friends and finding a place in the world. I pray a Rosary every day for her so she can find herself and the gifts God gave her

  • Bobby Ferreira

    Indeed! Like Anita, I want so much for some of my friends to get to know the Lord and become a Christian. I also want my sister to “trust” in the Lord more. To go to him for comfort, etc. Yes, I want for them to know the Lord. I pray it will happen. God Bless us everyone!

  • Debbie Brush-Garcia

    Yes I have and continually learning to give others that decision making. They too are on their own journey.

  • LJ

    You have not because you ask not our Lord said. All of these life situations are familiar and yet a close study of the scripture is the flesh and the blood life of the Mystical body. Train them up well because Jesus will give us what we want most-you’ve said that in so many words.

  • Angie O’Mara

    There are problems in my family right now, with my daughtet.. she is very intelligent, but I fear she is going down a wrong way street with her fiancée. He is a 3rd time recovering heroin addict, who is not seeking the proper help he needs. Her feelings of love conquers all, hasn’t stopped him in the past, and I fear he may be tempted again. I know I have to “Let go, and let God”, but it is so hard to see her struggling to make things right. I pray for her and him, but I’m having such a hard time..God please help me.

    • Prolifedem6M

      Try Al-Anon. They’ll give you some strategies and help you deal with this.

      • Angie O’Mara

        Thank you Prolifedem6, I have been to Al-Anon before, I need the support again, and have even suggested this to my daughter to help her and guide her. God.bless you!!!

  • Terese

    While I understand your pain in wanting to help your children, the line that resonated with me was Dominick’s when he said his 2nd grader was still ‘beating himself up” days later for what he had done in school. Self-forgiveness – that’s a big one. I know I am still worrying about something from my past, long gone, long confessed, and long since I said I let it go. But I know the memory still haunts me – and there is no way to ever ‘make it up’ so I just have to know that God forgave me, pray that I can forgive myself, and truly ‘let it go’. I have moved on in my life, but you know, still – there are memories that don’t go away.

  • Katy Maxwell

    I would love for my boyfriend to rekindle his relationship with god

  • Terri

    I love these messages! They are thought provoking for where you are with your relationship with God in your life. This journey I started this Lent because of this website has given Lent a new dimension for me! Thank you for all the gifts the team is sharing to have such a “dynamic” Lenten websiten

  • Pat Fontenot

    Yes for my son. He doesn’t agree with organized religion. He doesn’t go to church but he does believe in God. I so want him back in the church. He is in law school now. I’ve told him that only through the Father can we truly accomplish our goals. He says that he prays. I only pray that he does and that he’ll return to the church one day.

  • Maria

    My daughters school each freshman high school and she’s always tries her best and sometimes fall short. So I step in and help and she appreciates it but I often wonder if I want her to do good for me or her.

  • Prolifedem6M

    Yes. I want the Democratic Party to ditch the twin albatrosses of abortion and gay “marriage” support. These positions are defeating their candidates at the polls while the Party refuses even to consider how much they are costing it. Eventually, this mulishness will probably destroy the Party.
    I have long been an active Democrat, participating in campaigns and the like. I can no longer do that with a celar conscience. I can’t even vote for its candiddates, though I don’t really favor the alternatives.

  • Stephanie Houlding

    Like Matthew said, it’s the constant struggle for parents. I think that the hardest thing I have to do as a parent is to let my kids fail and learn from that failure. But when I think of the ways God has given me the freedom to fail and learn, I am grateful. I’m learning to ask more questions of my kids and listening to them better, rather than tell them the way to solve the problem or reach the goal. My prayer is that the grown to know God and trust in his wisdom.

  • Connie

    We want joy and happiness for our children and we believe God is a necessary part of that. It is common for young adults to stray from or explore their beliefs and it is common for parents to feel they have failed. We are also going through this in our family with our 23 year old son who is truly an amazing young man. We are trying to be the best witnesses that we can, strengthening our own relationships with God and continuing to keep the communication going, sharing God’s power in our lives while not pushing this on our son but giving him our unconditional love. I have faith he will find his path, knowing it will be on his timeline and not mine. Our prayers to all families who are struggling with this.

  • Britt

    I don’t have any kids yet, but I do have 2 younger sisters that struggle with different things. My youngest sister struggles in academics and is constantly trying to do her best. However, sometimes she just doesn’t want to put in that extra effort to study harder and longer. My other sister struggles with her weight. Our family keeps trying to help her find ways to motivate her and actually WANT to lose the extra pounds, but she just continues to live her life as is… She isn’t even 16 years old and others sometimes confuse her to be older than me due to her physical appearance. I pray that we all overcome our struggles and start to see the possibilities that God sees in us; that we too may see the great potential that others see in us as well.

  • Bill S

    Yes, of course. All three of our sons were very active in Catholic Life Teen at our church when they were in high school. They are now all grown up, in their 30’s and are not as active in the church as I would like them to be. I cannot force them to be where I am as a Catholic, as Matthew mentioned, this is the “free-will” each of us has. I simply continue to pray for them, their families and hope that some day, they will find the joy they once had of being active in their faith communities. Meanwhile, I will continue to set an example by doing the things I do in our home parish. For it is better that they see a sermon than hear one from me.

  • Mary Brennan

    Yes for my two younger brother ‘s
    to come back into the faith, they seem to have gone into the believe of reincarnation I think, and they have a disagreement with one another ,they do not speak to one another anymore I do pray everyday and ask God for their conversions and my adult children, for me I mite say something but mostly I pray about it.

  • Mary Ann

    Many years ago, our priest, speaking to the parents of teenagers and young adults who had fallen away from their beliefs, recommended that we stop pestering our kids about God, and pester God about our kids, instead! Pray without ceasing…

  • Yacira

    I know how you feel, my son refused to do his confirmation during his during his high school years. He said he had lost faith in the church. He stop going to church. I just kept on praying for my son, that he would find God again. My prayers we finally answered, my son has gone back to church and enrolled himself in RCIA to do his confirmation and have his marriage bless. So don’t give up, God is listening!

  • Ann

    I’ve wanted, for so long, for my husband to know the love of God and join me in my faith journey. Please pray for his heart to be opened. He is an amazing man and I yearn for him to be his best “you”.

  • maryvee

    Lord,you know my wants and needs even before I do. I bring them to the foot of your cross without even knowing all of them..Sometimes I am ashamed of how I have fallen so short of acceptance and mercy. I ask you Lord to help me accept your mercy so I truly see the possibilities,again.

  • Brenda

    My former husband and I were given a chance at reconciliation. This past year I believed he wanted to restore our marriage and family. I just discovered he’s been lying to me and has become reinvolved w/the woman he was with before the reconciliation.
    He says he’s helping her and it’s what God wants him to do and I should support this decision. I’ve tried everything to try to help him see it’s not of God but the evil one. Please pray for him

  • Mary

    My daughter was baptized Catholic but never confirmed. She left the church many years ago. She never stopped loving God but just didn’t feel attending mass was important. Several months ago she started going to mass again and is now going thru the RCIA program, I am her sponsor! She now realizes the importance of the church, she has grown so much in her faith, learned so much about the catholic faith and learned so much about herself. I’m extremely proud of her and so thankful to God she has come back. So never give up, God works wonders in his own time.

  • Cynthia

    Anita and Andrea, I am praying the brother and son. May God touch their heart and mind and dwell deep in their soul. Amen!

  • singing428

    Yep, I am that parent. I have a daughter I have been praying for since she was in 7th grade to come back to Jesus. She said she believes that there is a God and Jesus, but anything that requires rules, a.k.a. being a disciple, squelches your life and prevents you from living. I try to model what it means to be a disciple everyday and will continue to pray for her salvation.

  • Joanne Mickol

    My two sons have chosen to do drugs. I want for them more than they want. I pray daily to God, St. Monica, St. Jude and St. Theres. The oldest is 31, the other 23. This has been going on since the oldest was 12. The youngest started when he was a senior in high school. This is tough. Real tough.

  • All the time! Especially with my children.

  • Sue Burdine Seidling

    Yes for my 19 year old son! He has battled with addictions this past year . I know God has his hands on him and has kept him safe, through many prayers and intercessions. Please pray for him that he will continue to make the right choices, and see the loving Father God is to him.

  • Cynthia

    I’m also praying for all who are experiencing the same concern with family members. Keep the Faith

  • Teresa Wright

    I have a son who is 23 years old and is getting a music theater degree in college right now. Because he changed his major it is taking him longer to graduate. He is not going to the Catholic church, he gets paid to sing at the Lutheran Church. (at least he is getting some spirituality.) The problem is that he suffers from obesity. 500+ pounds. He shows no signs of wanting to get help. We have taken him to the Dr. and to psychologists and he resists any help from anyone. He won’t even take the meds. proscribed for high blood pressure and diabetes. He spends all of his extra time in bed. (he is living at our house) His room is filthy, his car is filthy, and he won’t do things like his own laundry. I try not to do his laundry for as long as I can stand it, but I always get disgusted and do it for him. I know I am enabling him, but I don’t know how to empower him. Anytime I try to have a discussion with him about his lack of self motivation, he just shuts me down. My husband and I had another discussion with him on Thursday night and told him he needed to start living like an adult in our home and he hasn’t come out of his room since. I am sure he is suffering from depression, but again I don’t know how to help him. He possibly has that opositional disorder as well. I say the rosary daily and have done novenas for him as well. I would very much appreciate any help/advice anyone can send me. With all I have said I think I should also mention that he has an incredible singing voice and is a great actor as well. He truely steals the show when he is on stage. I’m just afraid because of his size and lack of work ethic that he won’t be able to pursue his dreams. Please send advice and prayers. Teresa

  • Janet Maurer

    I absolutely have! My son is dyslexic and I homeschool him. As he has worked to learn how to cope, I’ve wanted him to work harder because I know how smart he is. I had to back off and when I did, he began to excel in a way I had not imagined. It’s hard not to cross that line, but when you respect another person’s freedom to choose, it will benefit them in the long run.

  • Geraldine A. Aspen

    I am keeping all in prayer.

  • Nancy D.

    I needed to hear this message. It came at the perfect time. I am a mother of two daughters, who are both struggling to find themselves and to figure out what they want to do in life. I am trying to be supportive, but at the end of the day, I realize that I need to let them make their own decisions. The only time I really try to intervene is when I think that it is a really bad decision, which is not often. It is a struggle to find that balance to allow children to grow up and be adults. The transition is hard.

  • Peggy

    Like most of the comments I’m reading, both of my kids, ages 29 and 26 are not going to church or agree with the church teachings. My daughter married a wonderful man but he never had any faith foundation. They now have a little girl and it’s killing me that they have no desire to get her baptized. I am not giving up and will keep praying for my children, son in law and granddaughter. I keep envisioning and praying that one day my son in law will be one of the RCIA candidates and we will as a family go to church together again.

  • CathieHeenan

    Last month I was rear-ended by a college student. She was so upset that she kept saying how sorry she was. I kept telling her it was OK, I’m OK and your OK, that’s all that matters.

  • Denise Vega Ruvalcaba

    My sister wants to drop out of college and as much as my family continues to support and encourage her to stay, she’s adamant about this year being her last. We can only offer her advice and let her decide.

  • Blake

    I always want the most for my children – that comes naturally to a parent. But I probably never wanted something more for anyone than my brother who suffered from depression and addiction for a good part of his life. My brother came to live with me for a few months during the worst time of his life. I crossed the line – I did everything in my power to try and make him realize what I saw was possible for his life. But no matter how hard I tried and how much I wanted it for him, he couldn’t see it himself. My brother died of a drug over dose one year ago on February 27th. It is a sad story but I believe he finally has the peace he desired above anything else. Matthew’s reflection also makes me think of how we are often wanting the best for others but we don’t look at ourselves and how God wants good for us. There is more for each of us than we realize if we can keep taking steps to becoming the best we can be.

  • Maria A.

    Yes, for my little sister. She was having a difficult time after high school deciding on a path and I wanted so badly for her to go back to college and focus on a subject so she could be independent and start a career. She is 7 years younger than me, so in many ways, while obviously we are sisters, I’ve always been a “third parent” (as my friends always say). I want so badly for her to be successful and identify what type of occupation truly makes her happy.

  • Trevor Pelkey

    The first person that comes to my mind is my brother. We may have grown up in the same home, but we are certainly not the same person. He does not seem to have as much motivation as I do, with school at least. He does not seem to believe in himself or want to push through life’s obstacles now for the greater good that will come later on. I want him to put more effort into the things that he does and set himself up for success. When I say success, I do NOT mean in terms of making a lot of money. I just mean doing the right things that will set him up for a fulfilling and happy life. I do not want him to look back later on, struggling to get by, with regret. I think that it is hard for him to see the full picture now, and that he does not want this greater good that only I completely see for him right now. I need to keep trying to show him this greater good, this key to lasting happiness, and make him want it as much for himself as I do.

  • Emma Spaulding

    Yes. I can clearly remember times when I sisters went down the wrong path and we would tell them to turn around or they would ruin their life. Sometimes they were just too stubborn to listen, messed up, and wished they never did what they did. I want my sisters to be successful and be good people. but if they do not want that for themselves, then I cannot really help them with that. It just breaks my heart seeing them live their life like this. I just wished they would turn to God in times of need and not to things that tear them away from everything they knew growing up.

  • Michelle G Dahlman

    I can really relate to this topic today. I have a beautiful daughter who is 26 she is a beautiful person inside and out.IShe has been going with a guy for 7 years and now living with him for 5. In my mind he doesn’t treat her very good. His family doesn’t like her and I think he’s stuck in the middle. I just want her to find someone who will value her like she deserves. I pray everyday for God’s wisdom to help her see the light. The more I talk to her about it the more she turns away from me. God grant me through grace to empower her. As I read today’s chapter and listened to Matthew’s lesson I just felt a relief come over me.

    • Julie Williams

      God bless you, Michelle. I used to feel that way about my son-in-law. He did not seem to appreciate my daughter & thought the marriage would be her all giving & him all taking. Well, today, 13 years later I see a different dynamic going on. He really steps up, helps with the kids and is an awesome father and husband. Perhaps it started happening before I noticed it, but love, Gods love prevails……always, however it turns out. Hope this helps!

  • John O’Reilly

    Fantastic videos. Thought provoking. Greatly appreciated. The thought and care put into these videos – really it’s hard to express how much your efforts mean. Thank you!

  • Julie Williams

    I see that everyone is talking about wanting their loved ones to come back to the church. I will pray for you all & your families. This is probably a little off the subject, but I have a huge desire for the people in my life to quit smoking. I used to smoke & know how hard it is to quit, since I tried 4 times. My uncle just gave up trying to quit and I watched him die from lack of oxygen. There are other people in my life that smoke, I wished there was a way that they could magically feel the way I feel when I breath now, so they could struggle through the hard part of quitting and know That it is worth the struggle. I have to say, even the people I hardly know, when I see them doing this to themselves, it makes my heart hurt because I know how they will feel if they continue, and how they CAN feel if they stop. Thanks for listening…God bless.

  • Suzzz

    Oh yes, yes, yes! For my adult son to conquer alcoholism. Such potential! Such intellect, personality, good looks……… gone along with a good career, a little boy, his home, his health………. I have learned to be more like God our Father……… not to rescue, not to “cross the line” to do what he has to do for himself. Heartbreaking nevertheless………

    • Julie Williams

      I will pray for your son as well. He also has the blessing of knowing you are there so, never give up praying.

      • Suzzz

        Thank you. I pray then leave it in Our Lord’s hands. Thank you again

  • Sue

    I too, have my children (who I did take to church & have been baptized) but they have not led my grandchildren in that direction. Now my great grandchildren are on the same path. I want so much for them to love the Heavenly Father as much as I do. Please support my prayers.

  • Anna

    Wow…I constantly find myself praying to God, asking Him to fill my daughter with desire because I know she has so much untapped potential in many areas of her life. BUT, I have never prayed for myself to receive that same desire. Thanks Matthew Kelly for presenting an awareness to me! I will now include myself in tgat prayer.

  • Agatha Ezeani

    Yes, in my own situation I have always wanted my sister to do better than me career Wise.

  • Rebecca Desporte

    Yes, I always pray for my adult daughter to return to the church and to be a positive influence on her children. She has so many problems in her life and it’s very hard to sit back and watch. But a parent’s love is unconditional and all I can do is watch and pray. God loves us even more than we could ever imagine as he loves us and wants us to be the best version of ourselves. I understand that as I want the same for my daughter.

  • Ray Towle

    I have found this to be true about our amazing faith. In our separate faith journeys, just because some of us are further ahead or behind; on a straight, crooked, or winding path; going higher, on a flat part, of going down; that does not ever mean that anyone is lost. Our faith is small enough and shallow enough for one small lamb to wade in; and also large enough and deep enough for large schools of blue wales to get lost in. Whenever or wherever people become ready on their own, God is, then and there, ready for them.

  • Sherry McCollum

    My family tends to think they are not worthy of doing greater things in their lives. I am basically the cheerleader for my family to not put themselves down for trying new things. My husband is really good with improving our home for improvements but he doesn’t think anyone else would virtue his work. Our son is pretty active in our church which myself and his father are so proud of that but we feel there are times when he respects his church family more than his own. We always wanted him to dive head first into his faith but show the same for his family. Little one sided if you ask me but that is why I am diving head first into learning more about my own faith just to perhaps get inside how my son acts and feels about things. We have always told him if you cannot talk to us about anything, there is always God..

  • Joanne

    Yes, I want my middle-aged son to be freed of the slavery of active alcoholism. Through the grace of our all-loving God and my son’s own cooperation with that grace, he has had several years of sobriety as a young adult husband/father. However, he relapsed into drinking many years ago, had a traumatic brain injury and many significant losses in his life. He relapsed into nearly a constant state of drunkenness and has remained there until the present time.
    Today, on the eve of his 51st birthday, I will be going to visit him, to remind him of how much his family and especially God loves him and how, with God’s strength, he might return to the freedom and truth of sober living.
    PLEASE PRAY FOR MY SON AND OTHER LIKE HIM WHO ARE ENSLAVED BY ALCOHOL AND OTHER DRUGS.
    Thank each of you and let’s thank Matthew Kelly and his team for helping us to overcome resistance to happiness during this Lent.

  • Waiting Patiently

    This is a hard one to deal with. I have 5 children and it’s hard to “let go” and let them earn/learn things on their own. I do it because I love them and I know that jumping in will not solve the problem sometimes. It’s a touching thing to know when and to when not. Convexly I am very aware that I don’t always see what is in my own best interest, and it’s hard to solicit an unbiased opinion on which turn to make. God, I love you and trust you completely, please show me your way for me, and feel free to whack me over the head cause you know all to well how thick I can be sometimes.

  • Erin Augustine Molstad

    I feel this way with my 19 year old son. He is so talented and smart and has the capability to do AMAZING things, but he doesn’t believe in himself. He has been through some pretty low times in his life and has had to deal with issues that no child should have to experience. God and we as his parents have helped bring him through those times and he has overcome so many obstacles! We want so many things for him but he has to believe in himself and want the same. It’s hard not to cross that line as a parent but we just need to continue to encourage and support him. I know God has a plan for his life and I believe he will do great things! I just need to step back, pray and let God take over. That is SO hard to do but this is where faith and trust in God comes in.

  • Mike

    Please pray for my father. My both parents are very ill my father is 83 years old. They have been married for 60 plus years. However, after ten years of their marriage my father commited adultery and lived a double life for two decades. It was very difficult for all of us, I wanted my mother to annul her marriage and could not understand why she would put up with it. My mother is a very devout Catholic and was always praying for the family too not carry hate and to be able to forgive. Well her prayers were answered. My father ended his affair approximately 30 years ago. So where i am going with this is that I know God wants for my father to be at peace more than my dad thinks so. He always worries if God would forgive him for what he did, he is living his years of purgatory on earth. He feels that all his medical illness and pains are a small price of sacrifice for what he cause my mom and family. I think he’s just holding on because he is afraid that God will not forgive him and even though I’ve reminded him that he has ask for forgiveness, confess, and repented Good will be waiting for him. So i want my father to find PEACE more than he can imagine. Please pray for him.

  • Harold

    JMJ
    I can definitely relate to Mathew’s treatise on wanting more for someone than they want for themselves. I and my wife (our marriage is 60 years old) have 6 children, 20 grand children and 35 great grandchildren. They are all fairing well in the temporal world. However we certainly want more for them spiritually than (apparently) they want for themselves. Of course this is frustraring. However, I realize that the spiritual foundation I provided for them in their rearing was not nearly as strong as what could have (should have) been. Now, God has given (and is giving) me ALL that I need to enjoy communion with Himself. Am I taking full advantage of His gifts? No, I am not. Well, if God can indeed be frustrated, then He is frustrated with me. My prayer is that, by God’s grace, I will more zealously practice the spiritual and corporal works of mercy in order to have a progressively better relationship with Him. “Lord, I believe—–help my unbelief! And may God shine His face upon you and give you peace.

  • SJones7208

    I am constantly having to remind myself that my children’s lives are theirs to live…mistakes and all. I know that my life isn’t everything my parents dreamed for me but I wouldn’t change one aspect in my life as I know God knows my heart and has put me where I’m supposed to be. I pray for them (and myself) to be closer to God because at times I tend to think I’m in control.

  • Jennifer Salvador Thomas

    My 11y/o is more often than not just unhappy. My husband and I want him to be grateful for the good things he has which would ultimately lead to happiness. We continue to remind him of the positive things in his life but some days it’s harder than other to remain persistent. Listening to Matthew Kelly rejuvenates me and I am grateful for him.

  • Susan

    Of course… I think most want something good for those closest to them. I want the best for my child, my grandchildren, my husband, my friends and my family. I always forget always that God does too! Well…I don’t know that I forget as much as I want to control my family happiness by doing all I can do to make it happy. I finally realized it’s exhausting and I’m working more and more at letting it be God’s will. I pray and guess what, he listens and he answers in the way he knows is best.

  • Denise Guidry Mouledous

    It’s so nice to see those familiar faces on the videos! It is like seeing old friends! As a teacher I see the untapped potential in my students everyday. The possibility for kindness and compassion is in each one of them and guiding them towards those goals is very important to me-even more so than the subjects I teach.

  • Ruth

    These days full of such dynamic political, social, and religious debates it is hard to read things written by friends and family and not wish that they would, instead, believe the ‘better’ or ‘more right’ thing rather than the ‘hateful’ things they seem to be promoting. These kinds of unproductive thoughts pop into my head everyday and it is hard to push back from them.

    Instead, I am searching for ways to find connections, to stop thinking about things in such polarizing ways, and to stop thinking about myself as ‘right’ all the time. Giving these things over to God is SO hard sometimes, but I am trying to find a balance somewhere between the ‘them’ ‘us’ debates that seem to rage across the news, internet, and U.S. these days.

  • Le

    I pray every day and sometimes several times in a day that my young adult children open their hearts and embrace God’s love and return to him. Today I will start praying for All of our children to put God in the center of their life and return to Him.

  • colleen

    I am dealing with this with my teen son, who was recently diagnosed with a chronic illness. I know it can be kept in remission naturally through diet/lifestyle/supplements, but I also know that I can’t do it for him, that he has to want it enough himself to really own it and make the necessary changes. It has been a lesson in letting go, but I am seeing amazing fruit now. My son has truly owned it and is finding strengths we didn’t know he had and the effect has been remarkable, both in his health and his spirit.
    We also experienced it in a different way with our oldest, who made some very bad decisions and, for all intents and purposes, stopped living the faith. We had instructed him well, and knew he knew the right way to live. As much as I wanted to bring him back to the faith, I knew it was out of my hands and I simply needed to live my own faith joyfully, love him, and pray. I’m happy to say that he went away to college and had a huge, almost instant conversion, and is now discerning priesthood. I share this to encourage others whose children have strayed. Just keep loving them and praying for them, and being joyful in your own faith. Our God is an amazing God and wants them back even more than we do. A parent’s prayers are so powerful!

  • Connie Wax Crosbie

    Without a doubt. I pray one-day my children will realize the graces in store for then by returning to the Sacraments. It is so frustrating to watch them throw away the very gift that makes me the happiest and I know will make them happy.

  • Theresa

    Like many of you I thought that this message was meant for me. I so want my children and their families to get to know Jesus and the abundant life He has for them but I am powerless. I can pray for them but then I have to let go and leave them in God’s hands. This is difficult to do, so I have to trust God and pray that His will, will be done.

  • Sue

    My husband and I raised 3 sons in the church but not one of them practices the faith. They all “believe in a higher power” but not “organized religion.. my heart aches for them knowing how much “happier” they’d be if they would just put God first and in the center of their lives. But as our priest told me, we’ve done all we can, they must now do it for themselves. I still want it so much for them.

  • CT

    Yes, for one of my God Sons. He has joined several Mega Churches as he hopped from one to the next searching for what has been “in his own backyard” so to speak. He started asking me questions about some things being preached in those churches. I encouraged him to continue his research of churches and to include the Catholic church he was Baptized and Confirmed into. I told him a lot of people leave the church without knowing what they have left behind. The hardest part of that encounter was wanting him to return and letting God do the rest. There definitely is a fine line between wanting something so much for someone that I want to control the outcome instead of letting go and letting God.

  • David

    The only thing I would add is that after you have done all that you can do for someone you love, continue your prayers and then get out of God’s way and trust Him. He ALWAYS answers our prayers, but in His way and in His time. Jesus, I trust in you!

  • Rich Quesada

    Yes for my children to be strong Catholics attend Mass follow the Gospel and keep God as focal point of their lives. They are missing so much when they miss Mass
    They miss opportunities to receive Holy Communion and learn about being Catholic. I pray for them daily

  • Jolee

    I believe God will change the hearts of my 4 adult children so they will accept Jesus in their hearts again.At this moment I certainly feel I want this for them more than they want it for themselves but I keep praying. I already see some changes happening.One of my adult sons and his family have begun going to a christian church every week and are enjoy it.Especially the children . It’s not a catholic church but Jesus hand is all over this. This son began discussing their decision to start going to church at a holiday get together with the whole family.I think the seeds are being planted and I continue to pray,not push,but answer all questons especially from the grandchildren.

  • Dale R Evans

    One morning a few years ago I was feeling real good about my daughter and her embrace of our Lord. For a reason I can not remember I found my book on Revelation. As I was walking back to my desk I noticed I had inadvertently inserted my thumb between some pages with some highlighted text. I stopped and read the highlighted text. It was about our Lord’s letter to the church at Smyrna. He praises them for their faith in responding to crisis and then gives them a new assignment that will cost them their life. Shortly thereafter a serious problem with my son emerged. At this time it is still a work in progress.

  • an ordinary old retired guy

    Many prayers to St Monica for my family all the time. Love the phrase God is good all the time; all the time God is good, repeat it often. In addition, Matthew’s message had special meaning for me as a Lay Chaplain and Mentor to Inmates and Returning Citizens. I have those desires for success for those I minister to or mentor all the time and am challenged so many times to be patient and accept that they are responsible for their own choices. I must remember I am just a messenger and I must continue to pray…for them, just as I do for my family.

  • Kathryn Duncan

    I have a 19 year old niece who (like so many others her age) is wrapped up in social media and worrying about how others think about her. I wish she would see and appreciate her uniqueness the way God made her and make decisions from a place of confidence and security in Him instead of seeking outside approval. I fear she is too susceptible to the cultural norms of today.

  • John Laboon

    We are new creatures in Christ according to Paul the apostle. This privilege was paid for in full by Christ on the cross. We should embrace it and we should be transformed in our mind. This transformed mind provides us an opportunity for a deeper relationship with Jesus. Let go of the former self and embrace the new.

  • Jeannette

    Yes my son I want him saved from addiction I’ve guided him where and who he can reach for help. I wanted more than he does. God help me focus on me not in him. Help me trust you will take care of him because I know he’s 26 I can’t do anything for him if he is not willing.

  • Taryn Macary

    My twenty-year old daughter is growing in her faith and recently attended the Focus conference in Dallas. Shortly after the conference she and her boyfriend of 8 months broke up. I was so relieved because it was not a relationship of faith, and she knew she had sinned terribly in the relationship. As a mother, I know that he is not good for her at all. (She is my youngest of seven.) For the last two months she has struggled terribly with not go back to the relationship, even with the my constant support, and that of her very faithful three older sisters who are married and a women of deep faith. We all “want something good” for her. She has definitely grown some, and wants to see if he has, and wants to put it “to the test”; yet she is confused…she has her free will. They are going out again. I cannot control. I can only pray, pray, pray. I want something more for her than she wants for herself right now.

  • Katy Notebaert

    Everyday I pray for my daughter who is 22 and doesn’t believe in God and rejects the idea of even heaven. I can do no more than pray. Doing the Nineveh 90 day prayer now for her wonderful beautiful soul.

  • Steffen

    Yes. Everyday. I’m the mother of three children, and this desire relates mostly to my 16-year-old son who is amazingly talented and intelligent. I am trying to encourage him to apply for a prestigious internship in the sciences. Even though his teacher has agreed to write a recommendation, he is resisting the opportunity. It breaks my heart because of course I want what’s best for him and his future. Praying is all I can do.

  • Mike Gandolfo

    I struggle with this daily. I am in a position where I lead a lot of independent contractors and I constantly have to remind myself that I can’t want their my success more than they do. It’s even tougher with my kids. I have a 13-year old daughter who is a very good athlete and a 10-year old son who is a member of MENSA. Both (like all kids) are capable of great things and I have to remind myself to let them live their journey to greatness while providing some guidance along the way.

  • Susan Henderson

    I want healing from social phobia & depression & physical ailments more for my daughter than she wants it for herself. We have provided all the tools ( Dr visits, physical therapy, medication, & counseling) but she refuses to use these things to recover. She has a half credit to finish High School & is resisting completing it. We are at the point where we do not believe we are doing her any favors by allowing her to live with us & just sleep, eat, & exist. We are contemplating/praying about kicking her out of our home because we believe it will be the only way she will seek help. It is breaking our hearts.

  • Carlos

    The thing that hit home for me about Matthew’s video today is the topic of free will. God never crosses that line, but I feel that we do all the time. I know I certainly have. Whenever I have crossed that line, I see that it doesn’t have the effect that I wanted it to and it may even have the opposite effect. Matthew talks about empowering people to do things for themselves, but what can WE do when others are unwilling. We have no choice but to trust in God, putting them into His hands and at the foot of the cross. I have a wife and 4 children who have all turned away from the church and God, and the world of money, possessions, and pleasures has consumed them. I have and will continue to pray for them, and have asked God to use me and my faith in a way that can help lead them to transform their lives. I am at the point where even my most kind and well intentioned ideas makes them feel like I am trying to control them, manipulate them or steer them towards something that they simply no longer believe in or desire for themselves. Folks, I am in a full on spiritual battle against the hedonism, indivudualism and minimalism that is living in those that I love the most. Please keep my family in your prayers. I will do the same for yours!

    • Singer

      Carlos, I am offering a prayer for YOU right now. The 1st reading today from Isaiah 58 says, ” He shall renew your strength, and you shall be like a watered garden.”

      • Carlos

        Thank you very much. From Sunday’s responsorial, “Give me back the joy of your salvation, and a willing spirtit sustain me.”

        • Singer

          Amen. He is our daily sustenance, our daily bread. Hang in there.

  • Lynell Hymel

    Yes the wanting something more than the person wants it them self. The concept that God feels the same way I can see how crushing that would be because the desire is so strong and the person’s will is not always as strong or is not revealed to them the potential.

  • Tony Pantera

    For just about everyone I love I have had this feeling. As a teacher I experience it everyday.
    What I’ve done is to support my loved ones and students is to help them in any positive activity they want to pursue whole heartedly.

  • Paloma RODRIGUEZ

    For my RCIA group, the second year was the hardest for me, some of the participants were not convinced, and 2 shared they were pushed by family to be in the program. I realized way later that I was doing the best to prepare them but it was up to them to continue by free will or not. For months I felt the frustration, until I talked to some peers and my pastor who is very practical and direct, and just said to me “you are doing what you can, what they do is not up to you, let it go and pray for them”.

  • Josh

    I find myself relating to God’s grace and presence with the metaphors to parenting. So many of the worries shared in this forum, the pains that go with parenting and the struggles we see in our children open my eyes to the ever-present love of God. 4 days into this Lenten journey and I am very aware of the blessings in my life and am thankful. I will pray for all of you who are struggling with the crosses that you bear, that you are able to find peace in offering them to the Lord.

  • Alicia M

    Yes Ive wanted my ex-husband to shape his life up after he got out of prison. To be the best man he could be for himself and our daughter. Unfortunatley, he went back to his habits of using drugs and women as an escape from reality. Please pray for him that he finds his way in life.

  • Angie

    Yes I pray daily for my 33 year old daughter to find a Christian male companion that the Lord would allow them to get married and that she become pegnent hand bare children and they have a blessed family. She tell’s me that the dog she has is my grandson, she had been married before and had a bad marriage with her first husband. I also pray everyday the same thing for my 29 year old son that the Lord send to him a christian female conpanion that they can fall in love with each other and get married and have children together and a Christian home and family at me and my husband age we would love to have grandchildren.

  • Anne LaRose

    My daughter has my mother-in-law’s bible ( who is now deceased) & reads all the petitions for her son Richard who is gay & left the Catholic church. The requests are marked along the margins of the pages for her son’s conversion. My daughter now decided to pray daily for her uncle Richard’s conversion. I feel she is now taking over the burden her Grandmother had when she was alive to pray for him.

  • Amy Reinhardt

    Last April, my grandma suffered two strokes that left her without the ability to speak, swallow and walk. After almost a year, she developed cancer and was moved into a hospice house. This has been a devastating time for my family, but especially for my grandpa. After 62 years of marriage, she is the love of his life. He is heartbroken about losing her and is acting like once she’s gone he’ll have no reason to live. I can’t imagine the pain he’s going through, but I just want him to be able to let her go so he can properly mourn and know that we all love him and will take care of him. I want that for him more than he wants that for himself.

  • Anne

    Please remove my last name LaRose

  • Yola

    Always as mom I want the best for my children, as teacher for my students, as lead person, as a sister, as human always want/wish goodness for everybody. What is this desire? Why is it? Protection? Coaching? Managing? Charity? Being helpful…,

  • Jacob

    Yeah, I do try to make someone feel great about their selve even those they think they are a horrible person. It called life it hit ever one with a bump. I did continue to pray for this person because I truely care for this person. I see the good in the person and forgiveness.

  • Mary Huber

    I have the same struggles my youngest son is a drug addict and homeless. I want more for him and to believe in God and Jesus and ask them for help. He does not have to same desires I have for him. Please pray for him my ex-husband, my daughter and her family to want to know Jesus and God and that they ask for help for themselves.

  • Tammy

    Every day for my oldest adult child. He grew up with so much potential but got caught up in substance. I know in my heart he has good in him but he just find ways to make terrible choices. He no longer belongs to a church and continues to slide downhill. My husband, our daughter and myself want so much for him …..but it is so hard to let go and know that he has to want it for himself.

  • WisdomSeeker

    My heart has hurt many times for those I love as I have, at times, found myself wanting for them what they don’t seem to want for themselves. Such interior pain and frustration!
    Letting go is such a challenge but, praise be to God, I am living proof that it can and does happen. As you struggle through the insecurities, heartache and tears commit to trust in God. Whether you understand or not, the most important priority is to believe that God WILL guide you through to a place of peace.
    As I have learned, that “place of peace” may not result in the hope you have for your loved one. As Matthew Kelly reminds us, God has given us Free Will and will not impede upon it. Therefore, God has brought me (twice now) to a place of “letting go” and understanding that, as badly as I want the best for the ones I love, they must first want it for themselves.
    God gave each of us a life of purpose to live; I cannot live another’s life just as they cannot live mine. But I can continue to love and pray regardless of the pain I may carry for a life of potential not lived to it’s fullest.
    That is the unconditional love that God asks us to give.

  • Golf Tickets

    Our daughter who is married and has a small child was raised with a strong Catholic faith. She is extremely faithful and prayerful and raising her daughter in the same faitth for which we are grateful. I want to pray for our son-in-law who was raised in a family with no faith and just doesn’t get it. We all feel that he could benefit so much with God in his life and we want it so bad for him. Please pray for him.

  • June Lawniczak

    I am a convert and I know in my heart that the Catholic Church is the True Church. My husband (cradle Catholic) and I have two children who we raised as Catholic. About 25 years ago our son left the church because of a girl he met and eventually married. They have 4 beautiful children whom we love deeply but we are so sad and unhappy that they belong to a non-christian church. We have had to accept this and we can’t not love then because of their beliefs. I still cry a lot though! And also a few years ago our daughter and son-in-law quit attending church. They were both raised Catholic and they sent their three children to Catholic school. Now, none of them attend church. My heart breaks but again, we love them. They are good people but it’s hard to bring up the whys of their quitting attending mass. We’ve tried to talk but they don’t want to. Having to let go is so very hard but we still both pray for all our kids and grand-kids’ souls.

    • voteprolife

      keep praying for them all! I know it’s hard but my son came back and yours will too! God’s time, not ours. Stay strong, speak truth in love and keep praying:o) Love and peace to you, a fellow mother:o)

  • voteprolife

    This video/question is very timely for me and my family. Almost 2 weeks ago our 19 yr. old daughter moved out with her 18 yr. old boyfriend (who is a senior in high school). They did this without any previous discussion as to how they were feeling (they say we treat them like children). After the first week of minimal contact, we finally were able to sit down with both of them. We told them our main concern for them was their eternal life and that these choices they were making was not leading them toward that. After over an hour of discussion and both of them knowing the truth about what God says about living together before marriage, following the 10 commandments as a way of giving us freedom (not enslaving us), she still said well it feel right and we are not coming back. It broke my heart but I continue to pray for them, knowing God loves them even more than we, as parents, do. And it’s funny, I had that same thought, that this must be how God feels with all of us. Thank you for this video today and all the entire “Best Lent Ever” program.

  • Tina

    My husband has battled depression for years and has terrible bouts of self-loathing. He has gotten help at different times at my insistence, but rarely does anything proactive on his own. We are 60ish now and I have a sister with terminal brain cancer. I also have my own more minor health issues, but I don’t have the energy or desire at this point to push him to a happier way. I want a better life for him more than he does and always have. Please pray for him to accept the peace and love of Christ and learn to love himself better.

  • Joyce Paulinho

    Of course, as a mother and wife, I always want more for my children, husband, and family members. It’s a constant! I also face this daily with my first grade students as they struggle to make wise choices.

  • Deborah Kelleher

    Love today’s message, I have experienced this often as a teacher, mom, friend, sibling etc. But the most important message I also needed to hear today is accept mercy. So often I tell others God’s mercy is great and powerful, but I find it difficult to accept for myself.

  • Isabelle

    Wanting my sister to do well in a race we ran a few years ago together. This may seem small compared to most things. I remember it well… she was eight and I was 11. She was running the 5k and me the 10k. It was a two loop race and we ran the first lap together before she finished and I went on to do the second lap to complete the last 3.1 miles. After the race, as we stood there for awards, I heard her name be called for 1st place in her age group for the 5k! It was probably the most selfless love and joy I’ve ever felt for another person. I wasn’t thinking about how I’d done, or if I would medal….just about her. I was so indescribably happy for her in the moment. I wanted her to feel accomplished in what she did and for her to do well. We still run regularly together and are very close friends!

  • Dorothy

    I want my youngest son to come back to church. He was raised Catholic, but now doesn’t want anything to do with the church. He says he prays, but hasn’t been to confession or Mass for years. Please pray for him.

  • Sharon Seguin

    This wanting something more for someone more than they want it for themselves happens to me every day of my life. My husband and I raised 8 children and I love watching 2-4 of our 17 grandchildren who live near us 5 days a week. Plus as a couple I wish more for myself and my husband as we try to serve God through our sacrament of marriage. I realize only God is perfect and this Best Lent Ever program has made me feel not so alone in the journey back to God. I yearn for more happiness and the best version of myself. Thank you for this wonderful Lenten program.

  • mercy

    I needed to hear this. I had a bad night and let myself do things I know I should not. And it is so relieving to hear that personal reflection- it really drove it home. Accept mercy and let it go.

  • Arthur Brown

    Today hit home and makes me understand even more the more I want it for someone else and many times it is my wife I can’t accept her ability to accept the things that I know will make it better for her. Ah, that is the issue and it brings it back to me. I am trying to decide or force her to do the things I think is better and that is wrong. She has to accept those things just like when God gives us His love everyday and sometimes we know what is best for us but God has a gift He is trying to give to us but we won’t accept it right that minute or maybe not even accept it at all. Now I know how God feels and I have to learn to accept others even if they don’t want to accept my suggestions to help them. This is another step in becoming a better version of myself because God is wonderful and he has given me this teachable moment from God to let me know that it is okay. It is okay because when I don’t accept things from God that are good for me, it doesn’t matter because He is always waiting to give me more and love me more when I am ready and He is always willing.
    God Bless each and everyone of you on your daily spiritual journey with God.

  • Patty Lou

    To Anita and anyone who has a loved one who professes not believing in God:
    I also have people in my life who say they don’t believe in God. One of my sons who has told me “There is no God” also suffers from depression. I know that if he had faith, he could over come his depression. I have also suffered from depression at times, and my faith has saved me.
    My son is one of the most compassionate persons I know, and I have told him that he may not believe in God, but God believes in him. God lives in him. He didn’t respond one way or the other to that, but I’m praying that he will think about it. I pray for all who have no faith, and try to share what my faith means to me when ever I get the chance.

  • CK Kav

    I also have family members whom I wish had a more active faith life and a stronger faith in general that I know would help them deal with various issues in their lives. We also have distance amongst the siblings in our family . I continue to pray for them, and I also pray for myself – that I realize the happiness that God wants me to have ! That I become the person that He wants me to be! I know I can be better… a more patient wife, a more compassionate friend/citizen/woman. Is it better to pray more for our own healing first , so we can be a stronger example to those around us? Do we look in the mirror first, and then look around? I continue to pray for all of this, for all of us, for all who don’t pray. I am so grateful to have God in my life. I pray that he continues to open my heart and the hearts of those around me.

  • Sharon Seguin

    The thing that jumped out at me most about the idea of placing God at the center of all my decisions; was the recommendation to not choose what is most advantageous to me. I get busy and look for short cuts. Now I see I should choose decisions that I honestly feel God wants me to choose.

  • Kelly

    I was just realizing that there are very few people in my life for whom I don’t want more for them than they want for themselves! Every single one in my family, I want more for! It took me a long time to learn I cannot do it for them… I need to “let go and let God”.
    I can only pray for them and stand back. This so isn’t the family I dream of!!
    And I can see that I am not the one I dream of either!

  • Kathy Worland

    Many of us have taken detours in our faith. I know I have been absent at times. But God is gracious & things happen. Praise His Holy Name! He has been there to see me return stronger than before. When I listened to Dominick’s story about his son beating himself up for days, I thought of myself. I find it so hard to let go of guilt, especially from the past. I know God forgives but I have to forgive myself. Thanks for the vision that gave me clarity about how God feels. I too have people in my life I’d like to see have a full relationship with the Lord. It is hard to be powerless over them but I can pray for them & be an example as I live out my Faith.

  • Colleen Kerr

    Yes, I’ve wanted reconciliation for two male family members whose inability to forgive has painfully divided their family. Every time I am tempted to address ‘forgiveness’ with either of them I sit myself down and take my own inventory; alas I have plenty of work to do on myself with room left over to pray for their healing.

  • Connie

    Yes, I want my children to come back to the church and to know Jesus and the Father fully.

  • maryann

    This really touched me today,because more then anything I waant my son to stop drinking. He refuses all help,but yet it is killing my family. I have prayed like no one has ever prayed before for him to see the light come back to
    the church and God. Please pray for him.

  • Joan

    Dominic, Your son’s crying and “not being able to let go” is synonymous with the life of St. Therese of Lisieux. Explain to him how he can be a saint through the “little ways” “33 Days to Merciful Love” by Michael Gaitley teaches us how to accomplish that by following thee ways of St. Therese.

  • Maria

    Yes, my son of 15, thinks catechism is a waist of time. Only brings it up when things don’t go his way. We must pray for all our teenagers. Our children are God’s gift to us even if they don’t know it.

  • Catherine Van Scoy

    Upon reflection, I believe I’ve wanted our children to be successful in their educational endeavors more than they have wanted for themselves.

  • Pat Thomas

    Many times for my children and grandchildren. Especially for my son who struggles with alcohol and has for years. He has God in his life but has not been able to overcome his addiction. But, has realized great success in his life in spite of the alcohol. He admits his success has been given to him by God. Matt has quit drinking for the past month. Pray that he will let God be the center of his life instead of alcohol.

  • Jennifer Hueston

    I would a wonderful, healthy relationship with my boyfriend. We have been together just over 3 years. I would love to see him develop a deeper faith.

  • Mag

    Just a comment—God has revealed to us what is right and what is wrong…. and “we” are the Church. It is not some obscure hierarchy or bureaucracy ‘THE CHURCH’—telling us what we can and cannot (so to speak) or should and should not do.

  • LYNN

    This message resonated with me so much today. There are so many times I want things for my kids that I know are good for them only to see them turn away from opportunity. Learning that god feels that way about me was eye opening. Matthew Kelly and books have really begun to turn my life around

  • Barbara

    This reflection has me thinking of my mother of 87 years who always tells me to “be good to yourself”. I nod or say I will or will try and go off and go about my daily tasks, not really thinking about how she wants me to be happy. Then there’s me who wants my two sons to be happy and successful. My mother is wanting something for me and I am wanting something for my sons. I need to listen and slow down.

  • Cathie471

    Upon reflection, I believe I’ve wanted our children to be successful in their educational endeavors more than they have wanted it for themselves. I assure them that I’m happy, as long as they do their best. But deep down I want to push them to want the success. But it’s not my success to be had. It’s theirs, and theirs alone.

  • Paula Hecker

    I’ve wanted all my children to choose to live their faith, and love God wholeheartedly. I spent all kinds of time and energy while raising them to teach them the faith and instill in them strong Christian values stemming from fully embracing the Catholic faith. Sadly though, I have watched time and again as some of them have made some extremely regrettable choices, and it rips my heart open every time I have to witness the often times tragic consequences that they have suffered. Most of their hardships are a direct result of their own poor choices, yet they often blame others for their situations. I wish I could get them to dig down deep in their inmost being, an be honest with themselves, and then reconcile with God, because I know what a difference it would make in their lives.

  • Gale

    For my brother to become a Catholic, to build a personal relationship with God so that he can actually experience true happiness. He is extremely anti religion. I had to stop speaking and writing letters to him because he is so verbally abusive, but I still send him photo’s of our mom and try to write something short an nice. I also pray for him all the time. Talking about this does make me think about how GOD must LOVE us so much.

  • Wanda Sobczak

    Many times, for many people. When you spoke about our free will being a line God does not cross – we are always free to choose – I wonder what it takes for us to consistently choose what’s best for us. I believe one of the reasons is that our free will creates the very resistance we need to avoid; we choose to resist – sometimes without consciously being aware of it. We create our own versions of the truth forgetting there are no versions of the truth. Relativism and hedonism enable resistance. I often get frustrated, angry, or even fearful when I see others resisting what’s best for them – and certainly struggle with it myself. We also have to deal with persecution and marginalization; we resist speaking the truth in a “politically correct”world and so we may become silent or begin to question what we know to be true or worse, manipulate the truth. For me, it comes down to the most important relationship I have, my relationship with God. Do I really trust God? Or do I just want to be God and create my own truth? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed. John 20:29. Faith truly is my daily labor and only in Jesus will I learn and find rest.

  • Peggy

    Yes. My husband had a stroke 9 years ago. I know if he went to more therapy he could inprove, but he will not go. He has accepted his limitations, I need to also.

  • Elaine Cooper

    Yes with all 5 of my children. I recently learned to step back and let them exercise their own will because I realized I had just come to terms with this and God’s desire at age 54. I hope I reach them on some level so it won’t take them as long to get it.

  • John

    I wish my children would go to church. My Mom always went and I take after her example. I almost never miss Mass. I feel like I have failed my children since they don’t see the importance of going to church. I think they are close to God but I want more for them.

    • Melissa

      John, it is hard when you have schools, music, movies, friends, and trends all pulling your children away from you. Continue to be the example for them and never stop inviting them back to Mass with you. Your prayers for them will also go a long way in bringing them back.

  • Genie C Balantac

    … Yes. For my ex husband to have Faith + a belief in God.

  • Susan Williams

    My thoughts immediately went to my sister who was hospitalized several times for health issues related to her alcoholism – a disease that ultimately cost her her life. During one hospitalization, as I was getting ready to leave for the evening, I leaned over to hug her. She was not acknowledging that I was in the room, but I knew in my heart that she was aware. I simply said that I loved her and that no matter how much I wanted her to be well again, she had to want it more. As I stood to leave, she squeezed my hand and a tear fell down her cheek. I wanted so much for her to be well again, but she was never able to want it more.

  • Julie Muetzel

    Great day to be engaging in this Lenten practice! Wow, talk about hitting home! I definitely do this with my children. None of them are practicing any type of religion, and the youngest is in so much pain and all I can do is watch and be supportive where I can be. It’s so painful as a parent sometimes, and it humbles me to think about the pain I cause God when I’m resistant to the possibilities he sees in me, just as I see in my children.

  • JG

    One of my daughters does not know what she believes. At age 14 I had problems with her going to confession. A priest told me that she would get over this. But she is in her 40s now and does not practice her faith. She is the kindest person and would do anything for anyone but we can tell she is searching for something bigger in her life as many of the books she reads give us a clue. A few months ago she talked a little but I could not go too far as I know when I should stop. Please pray that she comes back to the Church.

  • James S

    As we get to know God, we want everyone to know the deep joy and comfort we fell, ourselves. We feel this most acutely when dealing with family members and others that we are close to who have strayed away from God. Unfortunately, evangelizing to one’s family is incredibly difficult. They know just which buttons to push to shut us up. They can counter our every argument. I’m in this position now, and instead of arguing, I’m trying to use my family members’ “sophistication” and “open mindedness” to get them to just listen to their hearts. God speaks to us all. If we’re honest and open, we’ll all hear Him calling us back.

  • Cheryl

    I have four grown sons who I raised catholic. I will admit that I was not the most regular church goer when they were young but they received the sacrements and two of them were alter servers.
    God has always been very important in my life and helped me through all the rough times and uncertainty in my life , I always knew I could turn to him .
    What I always worried about was that my sons did not feel that close connection and when they went through something tragic or difficult they wouldn’t feel that same love and support and comfort I always received from God.
    Well, there have been a couple of life changing situations in our family where I have seen my sons turn to God . So I realized God shows himself when he is needed and will keep pushing until he is recognized.

  • Loretta

    Let go and let God! Unfortunately sometimes this is easier said than done, although I try.

    • Ann

      Amen Loretta! I just wish I could convince my daughter to do just that! She has so much to be proud of and thankful for.

  • Stanley Elfrink

    After reading Dominic’s bio – I never realized Pope BXVI had ever went on a honeymoon!

  • Jennifer

    I have some close family members that spend time complaining about all the things they don’t have. They don’t realize what is sitting in front of them. They don’t hold God close to their hearts and they are left wanting. It’s exhausting trying to help them find hapiness. They always have a reason as to why they can’t follow through.

  • Heartbroken

    I have wanted something good for someone, more than they have. One thing is it’s impossible to get someone to see what they don’t want to see, because that might require growth and change . In this self obsessed world we have morphed into people have become quite comfortable in their delusional lifestyles. It very very painful to watch and pray.

  • Emily

    This hits home for me so much in our struggle to raise our children. I want things to be good for them so much it’s hurts. I have to remember to be empowering instead of controlling!

  • Patti

    Those of us listening to this 4th video can all hear the deepness in the message . If you are a caretaker, mother or just an unselfish person you can remake to video 4. We would always want something more than the person who wants it..that is happiness. We just don’t always get it.

  • Patti Casino Ryan

    After reading several of the comments I see with out a doubt that we want the best for our children, not for ourselves but for them. That feeling is terribly strong in me, can God actually feel that strongly for me. Wow it’s the strongest desire that I think any parent would have for their children. I have 2 daughters and one has strayed, I pray for her everyday and ask god to show her the way.

  • Heartbroken

    That is the truth ! When Jesus was sacrificing Himself for our sake and happiness. Even GOD said I thirst. I believe Christ thirst for all of us , but accepts our choice

  • Judy

    Yes, my daughter. She has a heart of gold, is well accomplished in life. Married five years. Had second daughter two months ago. She’s so wiped out from life’s demands that the house and kitchen do not get the attention they need and deserve. Even before marriage, she would laze around and get nothing done. Then she’d want me to come over and keep the candle lit under her butt so she would clean her apartment. Invariably I would start helping and we finished it together – or she’d take a break while I finished up the task. I enabled her – then and now. I know she’s capable – she lacks motivation. She gives so much at work then has nothing to give herself. I just want her to find the motivation to clean up her surroundings because she’s happier when things are tidied up. She too wants the motivation but isn’t finding it often. She knows I’ll help if asked. That’s not a healthy approach by either of us. God, help me to let go of my “want” for her life, and let it go for good.

  • Ally F.

    Yes!! So many times for my daughters, and for other loved ones, too. This is such a great reminder. Thank you for these fantastic, thought provoking videos!

  • Melissa

    It sometimes seems easier to help adult children out financially so we don’t see them struggle, but when we look at our own lives, it was those very struggles, without the help of our parents, that enabled us to figure it out. We did just fine but somehow think our kids really need us.

  • Heartbroken

    Just thinking about our desire for happiness for others. It just validates how we are made in the image and likeness of God. So may we as His children never stop desiring happiness (HEAVEN) for the other and trust that there is great power in prayer . We can pray always and without ceasing!!

  • Joan Natalizio Simone

    I just “got” what that means, “you wanted something “good” for someone more than they wanted it for themselves”. I am looking back on my life, all the things I thought were “good” for me, and all the “someones” that wanted something good for me more than I wanted it! By not crossing the “line” of free will/molding me instead of letting God unfolding me, I know I would never have chosen the relationship I have with God now if I did not wanted it rather than ” because someone wanted it for me”. There were people in my life, through the grace of God, gave me that support and love to trust me knowing that I must go on my journey and “want the something good more than anyone else who wanted it for me. Thank you God and thank you Dynamic Catholic Team for opening my heart.

  • Kay Beckman

    This is my second Best Lent Ever. How inspiring all the comments from all of you and Matthew Kelly are to me. But not just for me but to each other. What a Blessed journey we are all on. Thank you Our Almighty God for this Spirit filled ministry. Kay Beckman

  • Marilyn Russell

    Yes, many of my children and my husband have strayed from the Catholic Faith and I pray for them all daily. I look at this as expectations and mine for my children and the expectations that my children place on me. It is a fine line and when I cross it I am usually sorry for my actions and regret the consequences that come from my actions. I have found prayer is the best answer to all needs and expectations and placing them in the hands of God and just letting go. I can become consumed by my children and I would so much rather be consumed by the Lord.

  • Ginie

    Yes, my sons, but especially my Erik who had a motorcycle accident in 2010. What I want for him is that he loses his anger against God for all the “things” he has lost and be grateful that he is alive and has family who loves him and cares for him and my church community who prays for him. My son has said that there is no God. He says he called on him and asked for help and “nothing” he says. The fact that he is alive is a great thing, that fact that he can talk (Aphasia prevents fluid communication-but he gets his thoughts across 80% of the time), the fact that he can walk with an AFO is a miracle…TBI is a terrible thing, but Erik does not see what God has given him.
    I have to let it go and Let God handle this, I cannot continue to grieve over what my son does with his free will, I can continue to petition the Lord to melt my son’s stony heart. I can’t make him accept God.

  • Maryrose

    I believe in the power of prayer. After my husband died, I married a man who was baptized Lutheran, his parents never took him to church, and he went just a few times with his wife of 50+ years. I told him of my strong faith, answered questions when he asked, invited him to go to church with me, but never pushed it. I always prayed that he would open his heart and let God in. The last year before he died, he went to church with me and participated in the Mass. His dying words were “forever and ever amen” which he repeated over and over. I said the Our Father with him and he said every word with me. I knew God was with him at that time. He was an inspiration to me, seeing how God worked in his life and how much God loved him.

  • Patricia Brady

    I actually experience this quite often. I work at a prison and encounter people who will make some real progress, then seem to backslide. I want so badly for them to be able to turn their lives around and become the people I know they are capable of being. I have been in personal relationships with men who have issues from their past. I always thought if they experienced love the way they never had in the past, they would flourish and become the men they were meant to be. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that. I never thought of God wanting things more for us than what we actually want for ourselves. That really hit home with me.

  • Michael Ennis

    For this discussion, I am going to focus a bit on my current job. We actually have a pretty decent group of workers right now, however, some of them don’t seem to take pride in the department, and/ or their roles within it. I see some work very hard in their allotted time to make sure things are done correctly, and that each customer served is completely satisfied. Their are others though, that merely do enough to make it through their shift and keep their job. All of us right now have the potential to outshine every other department in the store, but it isn’t happening. Those of us with pride in their work try and get the others up to speed, but each time we get shot down, it takes a toll. Somehow we are considered number 1 in our district, but based on what I see every day, I don’t understand how. It really makes me wonder just how bad the other stores in our district are if we are number 1. I pray every day that everyone will see the light and we become the solid crew that I know we can be.
    God Bless

  • Ruth Major

    My son is an alcoholic, living without God, unhappy with who he is and is so talented and has so much to give.
    My heart aches to see him so unhappy. All I can do is pray. He just rolls his eyes when I try to talk to him so I have to step back and let God work

  • Sherry Hayes-Peirce

    Like many of you my desire for something good for someone more than they want it for themselves is in alignment with wanting my loved ones to know, trust and love Jesus. I also see many who struggle with health issues in my family that are completely preventable if they would make better life choices. It makes me angry, sad and disappointed, but prayer always helps me to know it’s not my battle it’s the Lords! I merely serve to be a prayer warrior.

  • Mary Aguirre

    I too wish my adult sons would have God in their lives; I suppose we as parents can talk with them til we are blue in the face but adults who don’t have their faith have to be ready to accept God into their lives; for me it was witnessing the death of my mother, I begged and asked God to help me (for the first time in years without having him in my life seriously)with a decision in ending her life or continue to watch her suffer and He answered me. I had an overwhelming peace in my heart when I decided to take her off life support; an extremely difficult decision,,,although difficult to witness her leaving me I feel I was blessed to have this very special moment with her.

  • Annette

    Matthew Kelly made me really stop to think about what God really desires for myself in my life’s journey! Free will allows me to journey to my heavenly home because Jesus loves me and wants me to be with Him in heaven more than anything else! How blessed I feel! ❤️

  • Christie

    Today’s topic really hit home for me.
    I want my daughter to consider herself Catholic again and rebuild the relationship she once had with our Lord. I consume myself with this. Everything I read, hear, or pray I see her in, and want so bad for her to see it too. To give it a chance and knock down the wall she has built. I truly hand it over to God and know in my heart that he will bring her back. But I can’t stop robbing myself by thinking of her so much in my personal relationship with God. And this focus today makes me think how much God must want for me to focus on “my” relationship with him.

    • Emmy Lou O’Connor

      I think you definitely have the right perspective on what God wants. Prayers are with you and your family.

  • Greg Bower

    I am struggling with this very problem right now. My daughter has greatness inside of her but she is starting to give up on her dream. At 17 years old, she doesn’t seem to understand that her dream is totally within her grasp and she is so close to achieving it but she is holding herself back. There seems to be nothing more that I can say or do. It’s ripping me apart inside and I am praying for inner peace, but it is elusive right now…

    • Emmy Lou O’Connor

      This is so hard when our children are involved for whom we would do anything. Sometimes there’s nothing more to be done. My prayers are with you and your beautiful daughter.

    • Ann

      Prayers for you and your daughter. May you find peace and may she discover the gifts God has given her. I, too, have a 17 year old daughter and find that all of our struggles and are very similar. None of us are alone on this journey.

  • Emmy Lou O’Connor

    I think we all have someone in our families that fits this discussion, if not children, someone. I know my mother went through this with my brother 50-60 years ago as he was just not motivated and not interested in college, etc. This even followed him into his early married life but with unceasing, I’m sure, prayers on her part especially, he turned his direction around and became very successful in career choice and a wonderful husband and father.
    I, too, have children I’m praying for all the time to fully return to the church and in-laws’ conversions. We have one and another is in progress. Where would we be without prayer and St. Monica??

  • Mmk

    Yes. Wanting my youngest brother to have stability in his life, financial security and less stress. He and his girlfriend are both deaf and life is hard for them and their children. They misunderstand many things and get taken advantage of often by others. Their children also have many obstacles. Please pray for them.

  • Jenny S

    I think one of the first things I wanted for someone more than they wanted it themselves was for that person to have “good/stable mental health.” My college boyfriend was bipolar, but did not want to be on medicine for his condition. In times of mania, he was downright scary to be around. But yet at these times, he felt wonderful and I imagine he felt like he was on a high of some sort. (So of course he wouldn’t want to be on medicine that resulted in him not feeling so “good”). But in reality, he made terrible choices when manic, and was paranoid and argumentative with others. (In his mania, he was hospitalized, lost his job, became super religious, bought a car he could not afford–due to not having a job, and had numerous “argumentative”/paranoid conflicts with people). While maybe medicine was not the only option, he did need some sort of therapy or monitoring which he was unwilling to get.

    However, in wanting this boyfriend to have “stable mental health,”) to pursue treatment with a therapist, to be on recommended medication), I feel like there was a selfish motivation for my wanting this. I wanted my boyfriend to manage his condition because when he was manic our relationship took a huge toll. Really, the relationship ended because I was not strong enough to keep going through his untreated/unmaintained cycles. I wanted him to have “stable mental health” so that I could continue to be in a relationship with him. (I think this can be argued as being selfish on my part).

    I also wanted my uncle who was alcoholic to stop drinking. He did not want that for himself, and did die due to alcoholism (liver/organ failure).

  • bill k

    My 20 yr old son Kevin was off to college to study what he likes best, gaming. There is a program for this . He bluffed his way thru hi school and we thought”okay he is majoring in something he really likes”. 1 semester and he flunked out, not just barely but famously. He is such a smart and caring young man we just wish he woulld apply himself. He was let back on academic probation and we will see what happens.Perfect example of someone wanting the best for another and the other person not quite on the same wave length.

  • Anabel Diaz

    Yes, I feel like that all the time with my brother. I just wish he would open the doors, and open his heart for God. Let God welcome him with open arms. He’s so unhappy; his outlet is the alcohol.
    Please pray for him.
    Please pray for my brother.

  • Peggy

    As a parent you are always trying so show you children a better way or an explanation. And you are right most of the rime they are not open to it. Then the light turns on, thank you!!

  • Troyce Layfield Maner

    I want gay teenagers, who have been ostracized by their families, to experience the transcendent love of God.

  • Jean

    As a homeschool mom of two reluctant to learn teenagers, I face this challenge everyday!

  • Gena

    I always wanted a better life for my four sons than I had. I wanted them not just to have a better education (my husband and I only have HS), but to love being educated, to seek out more through books and museums, love to read and explore and most to follow their passions. I wanted them not to just attend Mass, but to understand our Catholic Church; the great and the sad. I wanted them to feel the presence of God in their lives every waking minute.
    I wanted them to find happiness in life by letting God lead them.
    These desires emotionally hurt at times. I continue to pray for them now that they are each, individually grown men seeking their own happiness. And, our hard work is paying off, in God’s time!

  • Mari

    I can relate to this message when I encounter people that have not accepted the Lord as their guide. So many people are missing out on Gods love and mercy. I pray for all the souls in nead of healing.

  • eliana

    For my family healing, not talking for years…made effort but nothing..i pray for God’s perfect time.
    My friend to come back to the Catholic church and most of all for my girls to be baptized. I ask for your prayers….

  • Kathleen

    Isn’t that question the definition of parenting? Our children have their own minds, wants, desires, and wills. Of course, we have some of the answers, however, how will they grow and experience satisfaction, joy, accomplishment, or love if I don’t let them experience it? Whew, it’s amazing how good a job God does for me. I never put it in the context of this is how God is with me? Loving, caring, believing in me, and how I will grow, and choose to do God’s will within my life.

  • Diane Cruikshank

    Yes, my son, who received all the benefits of a Catholic upbringing and education yet has grown intolerant of all that I believe. I pray to St. Augustine and St. Monica daily.

  • MaSungula Poppy

    Yes I have always wanted the best for my family more than I want for myself and I believe in them more than they do in me

    • Charles Schroeder

      You are special and should know that your love for them is Gods love. I believe in you and don’t even know you other than you love your children.

  • Eileen Pryatel

    I came across this today and thought of all the prayers needed:
    Let my prayer be set forth as an incense before You, the lifting up of my hands as the evening sacrifice. (Psalm 141:2—God wants to be the center of you life: the center of your conversation, the center of your entertainment, and the center of your relationships. Prayer keeps Him in the center of all you do. I am going to try to do this daily!

  • Charles Schroeder

    I pray for all those who need prayers. One of my brothers is gay and fell away from the Catholic Church for that reason. But he has done and taken care of my kids as they go to college in his city. He is like an extra father to them. I try to say that God has given me a great brother to help my 4 kids as they grow into adults. I know he believes in God but doesn’t believe in the Catholic way. I have another brother who fell away from the church because he didn’t like that our parents suffered before the deaths with dementia and pulmonary fibrosis. I have recently have the belief that we all need to give our faults or problems to God. He will answer them. MAybe not in a way we believe He needs to but in a way we need it answered. Give it to God! Love to all.

  • Cyndi Southall

    Yes, I wish my Mom would find peace, true peace in this journey she is travelling with dementia. And loving and kind caregivers. It is a terrible thing to watch your loved one know they are slowly travelling to a world were they will no longer know their loved ones. She is scared and confused. My Mom lives alone a long way away from any family. She will not move closer to family because she will be away from what she knows now.

  • Mary Elizabeth FitzRoy

    The best example I can give is my daughter. I have always tried to help her see her potential (the best version of herself – thank you Mr. Kelly) as a person and in her career as a teacher. I have seen her grow )she will be turning 30 in May) and I wonder if she sees the truly remarkable person she has become. God has blessed me so very much with her in my life.

  • Terri-Kill Lanuti

    Every day….I desire that each person I know and love and meet awakens to the fact that Jesus loves them so much that He would have died on the cross just for them alone….

  • Grace Browne

    Yes, my husband to be confirmed. He always says there’s no time for that and being baptized is good enough. I told him about the gifts he would be receiving from the Holy Spirit and he looked at me as if he didn’t know what I was saying. Please pray for him and those like him who don’t know what the don’t know and don’t feel it’s a priority and that it’s good for them.

  • Amy

    Inexplicably difficult to be in this position. As a parent of two teenage boys, I am met with this almost daily. Working through this I feel is a gift I can give to my children. There is so much pressure – school, friends, sports, home. I have to try harder.

    • Syd

      Amy,

      I realize you want to try harder and your teenage boys have lots of expectations that is placed on them at a young age. It seems you trying hard is also an expectation possibly from you to them and it may make them feel the need to rebel against you because the weight is too much. It seems it could be better to not try harder, just be a living supportive presence, listen, validate their experiences, and trust you have given them the foundation they need. Your supportive presence I feel could do more along their journey than working harder to be better. Your good appears good enough and better seems to define and divide experience into different categories. Your boys do not need this, so maybe just help them trust their unfolding, like flow and this enormous creative dance. I feel your boys need to feel they can rest in your hope and they can rest a moment from all their endless agendas and projects. You are doing a good job and so is God doing a good job, therefore rest in Hope which allows your boys to rest also.

  • Sandy

    I, too, have family members who feel that Jesus is a myth. It makes me sad for the emptyness and hopelessness they must experience when so much joy can be found in the Lord. Please pray that their hearts will soften.

  • Sylvia

    always pray that my 3 grown children would go to mass every week…Middle son will join us occasionally and the daughter says she goes near her apt….but my eldest son has stayed away other than xmas and easter….now he has two children and told me today he is taking entire family to mass tomorrow….I am overjoyed and praying this is first of many Sundays

  • Jesse Bourque

    It’s almost a daily struggle for me when I encounter subordinates who have the knowledge and expertise to fix something themselves, but for whatever reason, are not able to overcome some sort of mental obstacle. Considering that I know how to fix the problem, and likely could do so in a fraction of the time that they could, it would be so easy to just correct the deficiency myself (so that my supervisor is satisfied that the problem is solved). I would like to be stronger and revert to prayer when I feel that angst starting to wash over me, so that I can let go of my own frustrations and impatience; I want to let my subordinates correct the deficiency themselves and by doing so, create in themselves the confidence and resilience to tackle bigger and bigger problems.

  • Suzanne

    We all want the best for our children. I will be praying for all of you that God guides your children to be the best version of themselves.

  • Cheryl Beseler

    A friend told me about a sermon she heard recently – the message was this: Ask once, be grateful every day. When I think about this question, I go back to this message, and remind myself that I must allow others to find their own way – that my job is to support, remind them of the goodness and thank God for allowing me to be part of the process. I believe that God puts us in situations where we want more for others than they want it themselves to give us an opportunity to feel the frustration, look at ourselves and reflect on the possibilities that God and others see in us…and to allow us to see how, through His grace and mercy we can let go of the things we cannot control (the choices of others) and let God assist us with our own stuff…

  • Dave Lupo

    For my friend, Sean, who has a lot of potential, but is caught up in a family where there is substance abuse. He has to keep an eye on his brother, Chuck, who is often on a rampage, and is an abuser. Sean has a job, and is a good guy, but does not have much hope for himself. I believe he can do so much better, and truly want good things to come his way, to offer him the possibility of a brighter outlook on life, and a stronger discipleship.

  • Kathy

    I am always hoping my son returns to church. His faith is still with him as I recently had a discussion with him. He was able to recall the teachings. When I visit with him he will accompany to Mass. He left the church when his Dad died. I just keep praying and hoping one day …..

  • Christopher Jachulski

    Yes. I want my son to have a fulfilled life.

  • 4kalger

    I often want more for others than they want for themselves. I’m in junior high math and science teacher and though I don’t look for perfection I do a lot for everyone to give 100%. That is not always an option when you’re 11 to 14 years old. Sometimes they just need a breather. I find myself often telling them that I want for their education more than they want it for themselves. I wonder how this length I can let go of that and instill in them a desire to give 100%, most of the time.

  • Janice Marler

    WOW! I never thought of it in this way. We always want the best for our children, more than they want for themselves but I never thought of it as God being our Father and His wanting more for us than we do for ourselves. This is so true and an eye opener. I really have to think about this.

  • Jackie

    Yes, for my son to believe in God again.

  • Abbie Mitchell

    Yes…I want my husband to be healthier, but he has to want it for himself. I can set up appointments, find good medications, therapies, and encourage him on the way. At some point, I have to pray that he will make the right choices for himself and his health.

  • Lynn Dunker

    It’s so hard to watch someone in a destructive cycle that repeatedly circles back around to you trying to put them back together. It’s a cross I bear feeling that this is what God calls me to do. Love them when I can, pray when they turn back into that cycle that turns them away from what they know is right, and trust in God to get all of us through it another time.

  • Sophie

    O mama’s I share with you your pain, my son ( 34 ) is living with a woman and they have a beautiful boy ( almost 3 ) .She was raised in a broken family and being married doesn’t mean a thing. My son stop practice faith long time ago, it’s a long story ,but I tell you this to all of you mother’s have trust , belive ,consecrated them to the Best Mother Ever, Jesu’s Mother. and be at peace. Jesus will NEVER say no to His Mother.

  • Ximena Cifuentes

    Yes!!!! GOD IS INDEED GOOD, –like ALL THE TIME!, and YES OK, I GET IT ALREADY.. Yes you BETTER BELIEVE IT THAT the UGLY ONE IS CONTINUALLY PROWLING AROUND!!., as in EVERY MILI-SECOND!!.., and TRYING TO GET IN-BETWEEN THE VERY CORE OF OUR TRUE n HONEST SKIN CELLS!, in order to TRICK US INTO THINKING OTHERWISE!!…. BUT WE MUST NOT ALLOW OURSELVES TO BE DECEIVED!!

    It is ONLY OUR LORD, SAVIOUR AND REDEEMER OF US ALL WHO FROM HAVING COME DOWN FROM HEAVEN ABOVE AND THROUGH HIS STRIPES AND BLOOD, SAVED US ALLLLLL FROM SIN!!, AS WELL AS GIVEN US THE PRIVLEDGE TO LIVE IN ONE ACORE.

    Thank you, Thank You, and THANK YOU JESUS!! For saving us and giving us and Mother Mary, we love you and adore you for all of your unending Patience you continually bring to us wherby you show us just how many Graces we can be truly given if only we surrender your Son with wide open eyes, ears, mind and heart!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏❤

  • Dixie Wertz

    I have two wonderful sons. I am blessed. My 39 year old son is married and has two children. They seem very happy. My 40 year old son is not married, but is The Godfather of my five year old granddaughter. He adores her and she him. He is equally fond of my grandson who is three. He is not married, but has a baby due in early July. I want him to build a family and life with the mother of his child. They live together and I want him to make a life with her, so he can experience the happiness a family can bring. I seem to want this for him more so than he wants it himself.

  • Arthur Brown

    I have already have been thankful for today and my Lenten journey when I read an article of those in Syria. We live our lives here with an understanding of what is around us. it is time for us all to remember there are individuals suffering in our communities and abroad. Daily sin, war, power and greed are killing the innocent. Here is the quote for what I read.
    Where do you find God?
    We find God in every act of mercy we do unto others. We find God in our daily prayers, in our church, in our prayers with the universal church and in our work with and aid to our Muslim fellow citizens. The life of the Christian martyr Frans van der Lugt, S.J., testifies that God is present even in the heart of daily violence. Father Frans transformed this violence into love toward the neighbors that may be different in opinion and religion. He turned the Jesuit house in Homs into a meeting house for both Christian and Muslim families, and they shared everything: food, drinks and even prayers.
    May God Bless you in your spiritual journey of God, Christ and the Holy Spirit but reflect on others as our Christian faith is asking of us. PRAY, PRAY, PRAY AND MAYBE GOD TOUCH THEIR HEARTS WITH OUR PRAYERS AND THE THINGS WE CAN DO THIS LENTEN SEASON.

  • Lisa

    This was another “Ah Ha” moment for me. While reading this chapter it hit me like a ton of bricks. I had recently moved and wanted to start a new journey as a fitness coach. I was in great shape, worked through the program, was making healthy lifestyle choices. I also had the history of the yo yo thing. I started my first accountability group. I worked so hard at trying to motivate them. I shared recipes when they didn’t, I posted workouts when they didn’t, I reached out to them individually with no positive response. I WANTED IT MORE FOR THEM THAN THEY DID. I felt like a huge failure, like I wasn’t good enough to be a coach. It was during that time that I once again lost faith in myself and my God and went back to my old ways. I just gave up on that dream. I am working through this process so I can finally learn and TRUELY BELIEVE that I am worthy of all that God has to offer me and to be open to it.

  • Elizabeth

    This. This has been my struggle. For years. Seeing people as I want them to become for their own benefit, their own happiness, (because I see their potential) rather than to love them where they are at.

  • Michelle Peltier

    My sister-in-law has had a strained relationship with her son and his wife for about four years now. I have prayed for years that the trust that was lost in their relationship could be found or rebuilt so she would be able to have a relationship with her grandchildren.

  • Ruth

    Most definitely. Its interesting how this is the question for the day as it was what I was talking about with my priest earlier today in regards to my husband. He grew up Catholic, but about 5 years ago, he stopped going to church and rarely acknowledges God. For all this time I have been praying for him to go back to church. I know that I am supposed to help get him to Heaven, but he has this “My way or the highway” way of thinking. I’ve tried so many times to get him t go back, but feel I am just not getting anywhere. So yes, it is for him to turn back towards God and the Catholic church.

    • Syd

      Ruth,

      I thank you for being concerned about your husband. I also have stopped attending church because I cannot stand the wording at Mass. It appears to me your husband lost his beliefs in the Catholic Church, just as I have. Yet, I feel real faith has nothing to do with beliefs nor is it convincing someone that certain beliefs are true. The faith I am speaking about is the recognition of support from Presence. This faith is like the sun and it does not matter if we believe or not in the sun. Faith just lets things BE, and is rather spontaneous like a child, and this faith is beyond beliefs, doubts, and learned procedures. Truly your husband, I feel, is within faith’s supportive presence, though he may not express it. This faith is supportive and so I suggest an affirmation to him for his faith. Validating this faith is a supportive presence, which I feel you are doing already, and so truly there is a precious gift for both of you from him to you and both of you back to God. Also this faith is within you, like the sun, and just beyond any beliefs. This faith is a Presence and it cannot be harmed or lost.

      To both of you thank you deeply for your faith and being able to experience this in you is like the warmth of the Sun shining in you and what better Presence than this. Truly you are a gift and so is your husband, and I recognize your supportive presence. It is just this deep goodness of your faith and this unshakable confidence. BEAUTIFUL …… feel the PEACE …… welcome home to both of you.

  • Rose Gaddi

    Yes I believe that if we want to let people we love seek first the kingdom of God in their lives and let them realize that everything else will be added unto them, then we really want them to have more of God in their life.

  • Theresa Birdsey

    I pray each and every day that my family will find peace within themselves and with each other. God has given us all the the desire to be giving and loving toward every human being and I want my family to experience
    God’s love for the members of my family and every person they encounter each day. God Bless!!!!!

  • Debra Kyser

    Yes, for my son, who presently is not interested in Christianity. He needs the Lord to keep sober and be healed of things of the past.

  • Ian

    As a teacher in a city school I find myself spending just as much time personally thinking about my kids and rooting for their success (especially that I know come from very tough situations) as I do things like lessons and grading.

  • Diane

    I think everyone is in the same boat. I’m praying for loved ones to come back to the Lord. Sometimes it doesn’t seem like this will happen, but I’m praying hard that it will. They don’t realize how much happier and more fulfilling their lives would be if they had God in their lives. Hopefully, someday they will know this.

  • Mary Stoa

    Yes, all of my children have left the Catholic faith and are going to Lutheran churches, it breaks my heart but all I can do is to set an example and pray for conversion. Please pray for my children that they will see that Catholicism is the one true faith.

  • Cathy Juley Ledvina

    I want my children to believe in and trust in God. Trust in His mercy, forgiveness and desire for them both to have a great life. They both have so much potential as good people and have shown many instances of that over the years. (They are 26 and 22 now.) I just want them both to believe that they deserve the best that God has in store for them in their life. I would also pray that my husband truly forgive my older son and show him that forgiveness in his actions and words. Please pray that they may have a good relationship down the road.

  • MaryAnne Casaul

    Yes for both of my adult children. My son 27 and daughter 22 who have both recently moved out. I am happy and sad as I have my own dreams for them but just as our Father God has a plan for our lives and gives us free will, I struggle with my own desire to control my son and daughter’s lives wanting the best for them and seeing their potential. I think in letting go and letting God work is the only way. God’s timing is perfect and He sees the whole picture. I have seen some good changes in my son. I pray everyday for my daughter and son that they will return to church. They have both been brought up Catholic and do believe. I pray God will continue to develop their faith and give them the desire to return to the mass.

  • Angela M. Williams

    I think the key is to accept mercy, accept forgiveness and embrace prayer. When wanting something so much for others more than they want it for themselves – you can lose yourself; you become anxious and worrisome. Today in reconciliation – my confessor priest directed me to think of all the ways I can focus on praying for myself – and others – vs. just obsessing within yourself and draining your emotional energy and allowing that to manifest itself into nagging, complaining and taking it out on those you are hoping the best for – causing them emotional upheaval – or to rebel or withdraw. He said: help yourself, and those around you, see the beauty in creation (everything flowers, the sky, the sun, a starry night, the beach, artwork, music, etc…) and therefore the beauty in our Creator which is uplifting and motivating vs. discouraging. And then just say: “Thank you God for the beauty in your creation” (a simple prayer to daily show appreciation). Place your focus on the “Our Father”, the “Memorare” – join a Rosary prayer group or sign-up for Adoration or a Lenten Small Faith Group. Focus deliberately on “almsgiving” – one of the three pillars of Lent – and be charitable and help others in stewardship. Acting as a role model can be the most powerful ways to motivate “a something good action for someone else”.

  • Angie Freeman

    Like a lot of parents and grandparents, I pray all the time for my daughter and grandson to find the Church. My daughter was raised as a Christian; I was Baptist then, the faith into which I was raised. But I’d started to rebel myself during my senior year in high school, stopped going to church myself. When I had my child, by myself, I made sure she went to church with my parents however, and she became active in church activities. But here we go, another generation, and she’s in the university and stops going to church, starts dating…Now that she’s a parent, she wants my grandchildren to find their own way, I guess, and much like my mother had prayed me into the Church (I was confirmed two years ago, 50 years to the exact date of my baptism!), I now find myself praying like St. Monica did for St. Augustine when he was ‘in the world.’ She believes in God, she says, but believes Jesus was just one of many great spiritual teachers. Close, but no cigar…My grandson has us pray with him every night, prays a beautiful prayer himself, but refuses to go to Church with me. He’s all of 13, believes in the God of baseball; he crosses himself before each at bat…Again, close, but no cigar…I pray for them both all the time, and trust that God will answer my prayers. I just know it.

  • Isabel P

    How precious is this?! To be so loved that He gave His only son. That our Father in heaven wants so much good for us. It’s overwhelming joy and peace to be loved like that.
    I pray everyday for all, and myself, to never forget God’s love during difficult and trying times. I pray for my children and their generation of peers to feel God’s love and that He show His mercy to the lost.

  • Liz McGinnis

    I want my husban’s stress from work to decrease. He is a professor at a Catholic college and takes his work very seriously. He loses sleep at night worrying about things he has no control over. I want him to be able to relax and let God take the wheel.

  • Liz McGinnis

    Oops – I want my husband’s stress from work to decrease. He loses sleep at night and gets anxious about things. I want him to be able to relax and let God take the wheel.

  • Maureen

    Oh yes, please pray for my drug addicted boys. May God’s sprit come and cleanse them to make them the best loving men that I know they can be.

  • Susan Homan

    This is an important message for religion teachers, because they often loose vigor because they don’t see instant results.

  • I am coming to this a day late (can being “too busy” be a subtle form of ‘resistance’?).
    But I have, all the time.

    I have a friend in Seattle who is always having things backfire on her. I want HER to be happy, but it never seems to materialize.

  • Mary

    I’ve prayed for years for my daughters. The eldest gave me the impression she had no interest in church and when I’d ask her “did you pray about it” when she’d talk about a difficult situation she was dealing with, she’d say “no”. Two years ago she had major cancer surgery, seemed to be recovering and in 11 months had another major tumor removal. It was around that time she said to me…”I know, if this hadn’t happened to me, with the direction I was going, I would never have found my way back” I’m convinced that once she was back, God took her home so He wouldn’t lose her again. My heart rejoices for her , but breaks over the loss. She was only 51. A book that has given me much consolation is “Imagine Heaven” by John Burke. His research supports commonalities of stories from people who’ve had near death experiences with scriptural references that I’ve read and heard countless times in my lifetime. His book brought meaning, life, sound, beauty, and anticipation to these passages.

  • Lisa

    I’m a day behind. Yesterday was such a busy day running around. I didn’t have a quiet moment to listen. This one really struck me when I read it in the book and it is still so powerful to me. I always take my children’s actions as my own and my heart breaks and hurts because I want soooo much for them. But in the book he said we can’t do that because it leads to expectations and dependency. Which is so true. I need to let my children learn on their own, which is why God has us go through all we do.

  • Dorothy Infante

    Yes, just last night I was talking to my sister back home in my country. We were talking about her oldest daughter (my niece) who is in 1st Year in medicine school and would like to transfer to a different school. Apparently, she said she is being bullied by one of her professors because she doesn’t belong to a sorority where most of her classmates are part of. I told my sister that I have a feeling that it’s not because of her not being a member of the sorority but probably because her professor see other issues with her as well as her other classmates who likewise not part of the group. I encouraged my sister to advice her daughter to speak to her teacher and explain to her how she value this education and that her family is doing everything to support her and that all she wanted is to be good in school and finish the program. And most importantly to apologize to her professor for whatever mistake she has done. That moment when I was talking to my sister, I so badly wanted something good to happen to my niece regarding her situation because it would benefit not only herself but the entire family especially her parents.

  • Gia

    I have an elderly parent who has no faith and doesn’t believe in God. He was brought up Catholic. I pray for him everyday to have a conversion but he is so hard hearted. I have put him in God’s Hands to deal with this situation.

  • Sharon Morton Walterman

    This is my whole life! I want more for my children all the time. As young adults they move so quickly through life looking for self pleasure that they don’t always appear to have God in their lives I want them so badly to make God their center. So I just pray for them that they find their way to him

  • Kristine Dunford

    This hit home for me. The struggle to totally trust in God and know we cannot make those we love do the things that are possible for them. That is up to them. We need to pray for them and know God is working on it!

  • Debora Mahan

    Yes for myself and my companion to live our lives clean and whole as we’re were brought up to do in Catholicism

  • Alice

    Just getting yesterday’s video. Dominick told his version of the question so clearly. I felt like I was there. Yes, I want so badly for my husband’s mother to become part of our family. She has a lot of difficulties getting along with people and the slightest action causes her to withdraw. I see the possibility of what this relationship could be as does my husband and it’s hard not to constantly try to control it. It’s time to put this in God’s hands. Love Dynamic Catholic. I was sitting in church last night and just after a few days of the program, I had this feeling of content and happiness flood over me. It’s amazing when you understand God’s plan, how much better you can feel about yourself. Thank you.

  • Jeanne Server

    Yes, for both of my sons, one battling a drinking problem and the other battling self worth and depression, as he battles to save his leg hurt in a motorcycle accident. I WANT and PRAY they each overcome these negative battles and focus on the everlasting life not this life. Peace of Christ, love of Christ, loving warm love of Mother Mary❤

  • Rebecca Bruch

    Looking back, I’ve done this in my past relationships with men, but also many of my friendships as well. I want more than anything to see the people I love happy and fulfilled, and they don’t for whatever reason want it for themselves. (Also, my parents definitely went through this with me when I was younger!)

  • WJM

    Have enjoyed Matthew this week. First heard Matthew at Sts. Peter & Paul parish in Cincinnati with Fr. Jim Willig.
    Keep smiling
    Keep praying

  • Linda DeFelice Jeal

    What comes to mind for me is how hard it can be no not cross that line. It is a test of true strength and love. We all want to share our love especially when we know we are on the right track. However, we have to let those we love make these decisions as we try to guide them. I pray that the ones I love will follow guides light, love and plan for them.

  • K

    I want for the father of my children to be a better, healthier version of himself for our children. To put the children before himself.

  • Emily

    The moment I heard the question I thought about my kids but dwelled a little longer on my son. I always think & desire more for him bc I know he can do better if only he believed in himself & allows God back into his life. 🙁

  • Amelie Gonzalez

    Yes, for my niece. She has this enormous potential but she has learning disabilities and that brings her self esteem down. She says she is dumb and she is not. My niece is beautiful both inside and outside, but it appears that she gives up too easily sometimes. And, maybe that is my only observation. She spends most of her times on her phone chatting or watching TV. We want more for her because she has the potential. My nephew (her brother) is special. He is challenged and was born with a disorder. They are a year apart (my niece a year older) and share the same birthday. But, she has grown up taking care of him and still does. She also spends her time worrying over things she is too young to worry about. We want her to enjoy her life as a child not an adult. We want her to take advantage of the education that is in front of her where others in different countries could only dream of having, and we want her to build a relationship with God. I don’t want her to be me. I see so much of me in her. I want better for her. And, I pray God watches over her and helps her along the way.

  • Lindsey

    Yes! As a teacher this is the biggest struggle! All of the kids are capable of everything they put their minds to but often times they are unsure of how to achieve it! I always want the best for all of my kiddos and the hardest part is showing them that they are capable of anything they put their mind to!

  • Grace Cintron

    Yes, all the time I want something better for all the males that I love ❤️ in my life: my husband, my father , a nephew, 2 sons and 2 brothers. I dream of having a deacon for (1) brother, a missionary/ fray for my other brother, a father that will start going to church with my mom, a nephew that will increase his catholic faith, a husband that will show interest in growing more spirituality and for my two boys to consider the priesthood vocation , missionary life or for them to become devoted Catholics when they get older . Am I asking way too much? 🤔😁 My dreams for them are vivid, very specific. In my mind I have their lifes “fixed”, all figured out . I often worry too much about their spiritual journey . I just can’t imagine a life without God. I want them to ask permission to God for their daily choices so they can become better Christians. I want them to live the beatitudes in their daily experiences. But , just like many of you said- God is in full control. It’s only on God’s clock not mine. Although extremely challenging on some days, perseverance and leaving it to God’s providence is the 🔑key.

  • Nicole

    My best friend is in a horrible relationship and she won’t leave because she is afraid of the repercussions. (We are only in our 1st year of college-so pretty young) her mom will call me crying because he treats her so bad and she only wants her to be the happiest she can be, as do I. Her mom and I have agreed that this current boyfriend is not the guy God has set for her. He is mentally abusive to her and she just doesn’t see it. When I read their text message I could throw up from the way he treats her. As a best friend, it is really hard for me to sit back and let this relationship run its course. I just wish she would see how much fuller her life could be without her boyfriend. She’s absolutely stunning and has a great personality.! She deserved the world, but she just doesn’t know it.

  • Gregory

    As a father of 4 children and grandfather to 8 grandchildren, I always pray for their happiness. I become frustrated when “I think” they are not happy because what I see is not what “I” deem as happiness, but yet they are experiencing happiness as they see it. Letting God handle each situation is my weakness, one I am working on this Lent. God’s peace!!

  • Mag

    Should have clarified my earlier comment. It was in reference to those who may say–how can the Church tell a woman they cannot abort their child? Well, God revealed right and wrong to us/mankind and the we/the Church abide by His instruction (or not). Thou shalt not kill—no asterisk stating oh, unless it is an unborn child or a sick person or …..etc. There is an organization to the Catholic Church so it can function in the world—-and/but we, all members, are the Church with Christ as the Head of the Church. Thanks be to God and God bless all.

  • Therese Tamburello

    Yes, as Matthew says, “To ask God to help us see the possibilities (in others) the way God see’s the possibilities in us (or in our family and friends).” To me this is a lesson of not judging people. God is working in us. It is God who changes people. Yes, we can be an important catalyst, but it is God who does the changing of another person eventually. In the meantime, it’s best not to judge others because God is quietly and gently doing a good work in ourselves and in others.

  • Judi Baetens

    There are many in my family who have left the Catholic Church – son grandsons nieces nephews cousins, etc. I pray daily that they will return and accept God as their Lord and Savior, especially my son. He was baptized, received his communion and confirmation. He also was an alter server. I don’t know what happened but it saddens me. I will continue to pray. 🙏🏻

  • Heather Felton

    Good grades for my high school age son.

  • Irene

    It is difficult not step in for those we love especially for my son and my husband. You want them to turn to God, to depend on Him 24/7. I used to pray asking God to fix this and that and now I pray asking “God’s will be done not mine” and help me to accept. I  have realized my journey is to be the best example of loving Christ. The last 3 years with my teen and husband have been a roller-coaster, I want to fix us All, 🙁 instead my prayer life has grown stronger and i depend on the love and forgiveness that God is. Please pray for me, my husband and my son…

    Thank you Dynamic Catholic for doing these programs and helping us become the better version of ourselves. 

    It is difficult not step in for those we love especially for my son and my husband. You want them to turn to God, to depend on Him 24/7. I used to pray asking God to fix this and that and now I pray asking “God’s will be done not mine” and help me to accept. I  have realized my journey is to be the best example of loving Christ. The last 3 years with my teen and husband have been a roller-coaster, I want to fix us All, 🙁 instead my prayer life has grown stronger and i depend on the love and forgiveness that God is. Please pray for me, my husband and my son…

    Thank you Dynamic Catholic for doing these programs and helping us become the better version of ourselves. 

  • Tom

    I’m 21 and I have felt much like this guy’s explaining his son to feel, I use to be a heavy drug user and I’ve done many shameful regretful things to the point where I wasn’t sure if I could actually accept and forgive myself even after everyone who loves me already did. It was heartbreaking untill I did accept myself for all my choices and not for what I am just proud of. It is wrong to ignore what you did but it is also wrong to fixate on what you did. I realized that being alive is an example of God’s forgiveness so how could I not myself except my choices if God always excepts everyone’s. Just thought I’d share, I love you guys your comments remind me of my father.

    • Syd

      Wow, Tom I feel impressed with your emotional maturity and learning to not be swept away by every emotional reaction. Your equanimity is tremendously supportive and making good out of negative experiences into something positive speaks highly of your depth. I also appreciate you not trying to become a particular image or idea of yourself. Just this immediate experience of you and you just Being true is a healing force for me. I cannot help it, but you are manifesting a tremendous creative intelligent, a creative flow, and simply resting in your presence is making a difference for me. Thank you Tom!!!

  • montanamom

    I am loving these discussions and videos so much! My prayer is that this will be a “different” Lent for me this year. That I won’t just go thru the motions of the 40 days but that I will allow these healthier choices of prayer, seeking God, studying His word and this program to truly help me to grow into the best version of myself <3

  • Carolyn A

    Sorrow! Sorrow is the word that I feel every time I think of my children and had happened to them. They all are all over the place. I know that are lost. My 3 oldest sons don’t go to church anymore. They were all altar boys until the age of 16 years of age. And now it is going to take miracle to bring them back to church. They don’t believe in organized religion.
    Their father and I are going through a nasty divorce where he put them in the middle and talk nasty about me.
    It was me who kept the children in church and come to church on Sunday and come to the house as well. Sunday was for the family. And I argued and bickered for them why it is important to visit God at his house and why it is important as wel to get together on the sabbath.
    Yes , I felt and still feel the same. See without God we are nothing. And with God we are everything.
    Their light within is dim, with God all lights are bright. I did plant the GOOD SEED, it is a matter of time it will bloom.

  • Colleen

    This one really resonated with me. Of course it makes me think of my daughter and how I am constantly “wanting” things for her more than she wants them for herself. But what Matthew Kelly said really hit me. God does the same for us, but he does not cross that lone. Free Will is such a powerful thing and I need to realize that more often. I can show the way and teach my daughter, but then I need to have enough love and faith to allow her to use her own free will.

  • Donna Hebdo

    Pray constantly for two of my grandsons who have gone astray.

  • Linda Snyder Hillis

    I am the mother of 7 adult children and I wrestle with this question everyday. It is what most of prayers are focused around. Wanting them to be faithful Catholics, but not being able to do anything about it except pray. I know God wants it even more. I sympathize with all parents in this situation, who have done everything to raise them in the faith but done see the fruits of it yet. Prayer is powerful I know, but it’s the waiting that is hard.

    • Syd

      Good words Linda, “Prayer is powerful I know, but it’s the waiting that is hard.” My waiting is so exhausted now I do not pray for anything anymore. Prayer is now more like becoming this flow on this river, out into this vast ocean, and there is not sign post or directions on the ocean water. The “waiting” out on the sea water is such a lost feeling and yet it is everything. It seems like faith can do no other than walk on water, unshakable confidence, and everything is going wrong for my ego, yet the support of Presence is a faith. Faith and letting the Divine will unfold will always prevail, yet I am not very good at totally accepting the not-knowing. Maybe there is faith is here too?

  • Tiffany Taylor

    For me it has been my coworkers. It’s hard not to do work for them to see them progress, but to mentor & cheer them on to success.

  • Joe Vicario

    Yes for my girlfriend. She’s grown up her whole life without any religious back ground. I truly see so much potential in her to grow in her faith. I want her to grow and learn more. But there are many times when I feel like I’m just forcing my faith on her. And almost forcing her to grow. It’s very difficult to talk to her about my faith because she never has anything to say and I get very frustrated when I don’t get anything out of her. I love her beyond imagination, and I really want us to work out, but I don’t know if that can happen if we have two different perspectives on faith.

  • Elaine

    As a parent of adults I continue to want something better for them than they want for themselves. I can relate Big time to this. However, I know it is ultimately their choice and I pray their journey takes them to better heights.

  • Cinthya Vodanovich

    “God wants you to be happy even more than you want it yourself” was an amazing discussion presented by Matthew Kelly. The ideas brought up about free will explains so much to me as a parent as why I should not cross the line of wanting something greater for my kids but not doing it for them.

  • Maureen Gomes

    Prayer is our Greatest weapon we all can do for those of us who have gone astray.In order to receive love health & happiness, weather good times or bad.With God’s Love & patience nothing is impossible.Amen

  • Marlene

    I participated in an intervention for someone into drugs. I tried to tell this person about the things that they were missing out on with their use. She looked at me and said, “Maybe I don’t need what you need in my life.” Now in that situation it was a defense, but that remark comes to mind every time I want something for someone more that they want it. I can’t talk anyone into wanting God in their life, I can pray for them and try to show them God’s love.

  • Maria Thall

    Of course, when you’re a mother you want the very best for your children, knowing what’s ahead of them you fore see their future, where they have no clue what to expect, my son has made me very proud and happy in his profession, married to a wonderful girl who I love dearly, and may God bless them and give them a long life of happiness, love and good health.

  • EddieW

    I have a friend who is a shut in, he keeps no money on hand frustrating, and I told him what that is costing him! When I go to Macs on Friday to get a fish sandwich for supper, I’d like to call you and see if you want one too….but I know, you got no money, and I won’t take a check! He loves Strawberry shakes, and I’d like to tell hum I’m getting one, do you want one too? but I don’t as he has no money! He’s terribly set in his ways!!

  • Maria E. Vicenty

    I really want for my daughter to make wise choices in her life. I pray to God that she comes back to his path and gets to have peace of mind and spirit.

  • Tina Rieffer Doeller

    Yes and it is still important today. One of my sons has had a great many hardships growing up and has turned away from God. I really want him to be able to find God again.

  • Taryn Gilbert

    I have a friend who I’m really close with and as of late she and her mother have been making some choices that go against their faith and everything that they’ve said they believe in. And theyre making these choices because they believe it will get them ahead or in the good graces of the people that they feel will make a difference in their lives. But unfortunately they don’t realize that those people don’t matter, what matters most is your soul. At any moment God can call you back home… will you be ready? It saddens me because this girl is so young and so far is being taught that sometimes we have to compromise our beliefs to get what we want. I pray for her all the time that she doesn’t keep making mistakes like she has been and will learn to stand up for her beliefs. This world makes it hard to be different and stand out when it comes to your convictions especially as a student.

  • Debra Polselli

    As a first grade teacher, I always want the best for my students and sometimes I want it more than they do. I want them to strive to do their best so that they can be proud of their achievements and gain self confidence in what they can achieve.

  • Leslie A Luna

    I’ve been feeling as if though I have failed as a mother. For not knowing and teaching my children the word of God. I have been telling them that they need to get closer to God. I pray to God every morning for guidance. I want my family to understand that without God in our lives we will always struggle to be happy.

  • therapistmom

    As a mother and a therapist, I related especially to this video. It is a challenge and a frustration in both cases knowing what my child’s life or a client’s life could be and knowing that I might be wanting it more than them.

  • Marilyn

    Major behavior pattern. Always wanting best for others, major activist. Too involved. Good advice is to empower.

  • tjbowen72

    Yes, especially since I began truly practicing my faith. I want everyone around me to SEE the lies the world has been feeding us for decades. I want everyone to understand how following Jesus really does set us free.

  • DanaMari

    Yes, for my nieces, nephews and all family members who are not in a relationship with Christ, but even worse, don’t feel the need for one. Makes me sad. Please keep them in prayer for God to touch their hearts. Thanks, God bless!

  • Lpius

    My younger sister. She’s like me in so many ways and I don’t want her to have some of the same regrets I have in my life. I’ve always been cautious and shy to do things that are different and I looking back I wish there was some external motivation to push me when I was feeling doubtful. I see my sister making similar choices to me, avoiding challenges or the unknown and I want be offer encouragement to help her over her fears. But many times she’s slow to react. It’s frustrating but I hope that she realizes all that she is capable of.

  • Kathleen

    When my daughter went to college, she stopped going to church on her own (will still go when she is at home most of the time). We were dismayed because her two older brothers got involved in the Catholic Student Center when they went to their college and became Eucharistic Ministers.
    She also receives Communion when she goes to Mass with us but she is not in a state of grace. I have told her this, but she continues only going to
    Mass occasionally and not to Confession. I don’t want to push her completely away from her Catholic faith. I pray for her. What else should I do?

  • Stephanie Nicolini-Borem

    I’ve wanted my in laws to return to church.

  • Tammy Reasoner

    I cannot believe I missed Saturday’s post until now — this to me is the most powerful set of videos of all so far! Worth a look — and some thought. Thank you, Dynamic Catholic!

  • Carmen

    As a parent I think it was s easy to say that we have wanted something more for a person than that have wanted for themselves. My want is for my kids to delve into the gift of being a Catholic and thru Catholicism they find their happiness in God.

  • Nicole M.

    I’m a teacher and every day I want things for my students more than they want it for themselves. I want them to succeed and continue to try hard every single day of school.

  • Debbie Johnson

    Yes, healing from addiction. For a couple of my children, ongoing praysupport and for them to find faith and trust it!

  • Julie Welling

    I worried about my son so much when he was in high school. He raced cars and worked part time but never seemed interested in school. He kept a B/C average, but didn’t ever try. I thought what was he going to do when he graduated from school. One night his dad and I went to the school to find out the results of his SATS. He got a 700 — the total on both tests was a 700. I thought I was going to be sick. In fact I got a migraine so bad we had to meet our family doctor at his office so I could get a got of Demerol to help the pain. I prayed and worried about his future. We talked and talked to him. It was like talking to a brick wall. He went to our local community college and about halfway through his second year he told us he wanted to go to Texas A & M, his fathers alma mater. For anyone not from around Texas, it’s a wonderful school and not easy to get into. He went up there the next week and registered for the following fall semester (and got in) and received a scholarship for a 4 week summer school session. He is now an engineer for an Indy race car team and we get to see him on the drivers stand every race day.
    I don’t know when he woke up a realized he had a future to build, but I know my prayers had been answered. He’s also given me 2 beautiful grandchildren and I couldn’t be more proud. This time my prayers were answered. And St Jude helped a whole lot. Thank God!

  • Suzette

    Hey Dominic, I’m from Rockford, too. Growing up there, going through parochial school for 12years was truly a blessing. Yes, wanting something good for family and friends drives me – perseverance through prayer, believing God wants it even more than we do. Trusting in God and His mercy – always.

  • Denise LaFave

    Of course! I want to see my husband and son fall in love with God. I want them to feel the same faith and desire to learn that I have. I know they must come to this on their own and I can only be an example. Through my example, prayer, and study, perhaps it will happen. I do want it badly, but cannot do this for them.

  • Lauren Connolly

    My children say that they do not believe in God, and I have to admit that I had moved away from God for many years. When we talk about this subject I find that I believe that they do believe in God. And I say that because of their actions and the way that they live their lives. They are compassionate, loving, giving, forgiving people. I believe that sometimes people have for one reason or another, moved away from the mainstream God and have found ways to develop a relationship with God that is theirs alone. So while I wish that my children would see that they are living Godly lives, I see that God is living through them.

  • Kris

    Several times it has happened , Being apparent of three ! My oldest was involved with drugs , has since recovered by the grace of God, thankful , but for some reason , he can’t forgive himself , @ times and reverts back to the addict personality & be kitties himself ! I prayed a million times , this feeling will leave, he will forgive himself and rise above the old life and live the new God has given him!

  • Stacey Symonds

    I believe it is for my daughters….I grew up in a very dysfunctional home and I will struggle with this for the rest of my life….so that they never feel the pain that I have endured, I wish them for success, serenity, and pure happiness…but I push many times and I don’t think that’s healthy….I need to let go alittle, maybe even alot, and let them find it in their own ways….I need to have some acceptance and peace that I am a good mom and even though we but heads a lot, that they know what path to choose…..

  • Amy

    Yes! Everyday for my three children! I pray fervently, for my children. Especially for my son who was molested by his father, and is so angry at God! He said I pray but he did not answer, but He did my son I respond! I pray he returns to God his true father who wants only his happiness and good will always!

  • Diane

    It’s hard to find the fine line between evangelizing or bringing other good to people and wanting them to embrace it more than they do

  • DBH316

    I too have a nephew who doesn’t believe. If anyone knows a great prayer for this, please share it with me. He could be so much more if he believed and gave up his negative view of all things.

  • Mary Stewart

    Love these thoughts–I shared this video today with my family —

  • Aaron

    I have a roommate that has gone through a really rough life. Sometimes it’s hard for him to feel motivated to do things and hard for him to do things outside of our dorm. He doesn’t really have a sense of purpose in some cases and just really feels lost. I want to do so much for him. I want to teach him the love of God and pray with him and let him know that I’m always going to be here for him, but I know that that might be too much. It’s something I want more for him than he wants for himself. So I just ask that everyone please pray for him.

  • Julio Rodriguez

    yes for my brother angel to “straighten up his life” we grew up in a very dysfunctional family and its affected all of the siblings. I believe him the most because he didn’t get his education, and he struggles w alcohol and sometimes other drugs. hes not being the best father because he just cant provide. I love him and it stinks to see him go down this road because it bears a lot of similiarities to our childhood and his kids don’t deserve that. I hope and pray and have encouraged him to turn to god and to the church but unfortunately he hasn’t. however I need to not give up hope and realize he has to live his life and live his journey. just very frustrating. nice to share this. please pray for our family especially my brother.

  • K

    Yes, sometimes I want things more for my younger sisters than they do.

  • Hannah Diecks

    I always want better for my friends. But in reality the things that I want better for them I want better for myself. How can I expect them to make the changes if I’m not willing to make the same ones? The truth is…I can’t. I can just hope for them that they make the right decision in time. And the same goes for me.

  • Chris

    I guess I am the oddball here. Even though I am a cradle Catholic, my parents weren’t into taking my brother and I to church. Luckily I did go to a Catholic school and have the basics, but there is so much to learn and luckily there is several Catholic websites that is helping me. Going meat free on Fridays is a challenge for me (by the way does that include eggs?). All I can do is to continue putting my trust in him on this crazy journey called life!!

  • Regina May

    Yes for one of our children. The family prays for a return to full communion and while there is still a ways to go, there has been some progress. The child who has children has just told me that there is belief in a Source but not the God I believe in. Also mentioned that there is belief that when people pray for a common cause that they are heard and get answers. I am definitely hopeful, God is working slowly and we will continue praying~

  • Pat

    One of my rosary intentions each day is that my 2 children come back to the Catholic church. It breaks my heart that they are taking the ‘easy way out’…no Sunday mass, no Lenten penance, going along with the ‘rest of the crowd’, etc. I think of St. Augustine’s mother, Monica, and how prayerful she was until he changed his life and accepted God. There is hope when you put your life in the hands of GOD!

  • PJ Ernst

    For my sister to come back to the faith!

  • Vivienne

    My daughter is 18 years old, went through 12 years of catholic education and she is now in college.she is still one foot in the church and the other foot out; when she comes home she will go to church because everyone is going! At school she doesn’t . I have tried hard to make her realize that she will be more at peace and would have a sense of direction if she developed a relationship with our lord first but I don’t seem to get anywhere . I see her struggle and I feel awefull. I entrust her in my prayers to our blessed mother for her intercession . It is difficult! she has so much potential but does not realize that and we keep reminding her. She always try’s to look for the easy way out. Please all you parents out there , help pray for her.

  • Julie

    I have. For my future step daughter to be happy in her new school and city. It’s been hard as a Junior in high school to move away from your Mom that you’ve lived with for 16 years, to a new city with your Dad and his fiance and have to go to a new school. She keeps focusing on what she had in her old town at her old school and not giving everything she can to make it good here. It hurts seeing her hurt and struggle.

  • Tim Jensen

    For my mother in law to live happily and with her purpose. She refuses to take care of herself and home and keeps her grandkids from experiencing connecting with them by being able to go to grandma’s house and make memories even though they would love to.

  • Mary

    This is completely true. We are encouraging our 18 year old daughter to make better decisions. It’s hard to watch when she chooses badly, but we allow her to suffer whatever positive or negative consequences come from her actions. We pray she will learn and mature. And yes, I have often thought of how God might be very frustrated with me not trusting him or being the best version of myself.

  • Kathleen

    It’s my dilemma as a mother and wife. I pray that my children will realize their full potentials , & my husband to return to the Catholic Church.

  • Daragh Coulter

    For my husband. He’s kind, and he says he is a Christian because he “accepted Jesus Christ as his saviour” when he was a kid one summer at Bible Camp.But he is 61 and thinks acting like a 20-something “keeps him young”. I would love for him to aspire to be more like his father and less like his sons.

  • Mary Rhodes

    I read many of the comments posted below before I decided to join the discussion. The common agreement in the comments seemed to be “pray, pray, pray & leave the answers to God”. I know first hand how necessary this is. I have three grown children & all were away from the Church. I have prayed for them to return & finally my prayer became, “Lord, whatever it takes to bring them back…” MY prayer was answered for one of my children. My son shared with his dad & me that he had been addicted to adult-pornography for years, he was caught in an FBI sting & is now facing a prison sentence. The first thing he did after being released into his sister’s custody under house-arrest was to make arrangements to see a priest, receive the sacrament of Reconciliation, & the weekend we were able to be with him , he attended Mass & received Holy Communion…first time in probably 30 years. The beautiful thing about this was watching him say the rosary before Mass. I know he was sincere in his prayer & it was not like, “O.K. God. I’ve come back, now you take care of this mess for me” ,but there was a joy in being able to return to a relationship with his God. God answers prayers in His time & in His way…be ready to accept His answer…God IS good…all the time!

  • cdn14

    I teach a Confirmation class made up of kids 14 and up. They all seem to be good kids and they come to the classes regularly, but I’m not sure we’re getting to them. We want them to realize how amazing their faith can be. How important God is in our lives. How being part of the church community and helping others will be so fulfilling. How it will really make them the best version of themselves.

  • Lisa Klembara

    I pray that my children will see the evil in homosexuality and the greater evil in bisexuality. I pray that they will see that all sexuality is a gift from God and should not be treated in a cavalier manner. I have some difficult decisions to make in these next few days. I need to spend time in deep contemplation with my husband as we pray for courage, fortitude and wisdom and of course guidance. Please pray with me.

  • Cecilia Ramirez

    Yes, for my son to become a Catholic. He does not go to any church, though he does believe in God. He does not agree on confession or praying the Hail Mary. Please keep him in your prayers. Thank you. God bless us all.

  • Julie

    I feel that my two teenage boys are blind to all they have to offer. I’m easily frustrated when they are hard on themselves…which is not helpful. They really are great kids, but are at an age of comparing themselves to others more often than not.

  • Oh yes, I do. I have a sibling who is an alcoholic, and I want so badly for God to heal this sibling’s heart and that this particular sibling is open to hearing His message of healing and happiness in Him so my sibling can be the parent this loving, wonderful toddler needs and deserves.

    Please pray for this demon addiction to leave, and let God’s love and His will for happiness enter into my family member’s home so this child knows a loving parent who is always present, and the loving God who has planned a beautiful & bright future life.

  • Amy Rose

    I am praying for my daughters that they will achieve all their potential to walk proud, healthy and loved (by God and themselves) with confidence and worthiness, mercy and kindness through life and it’s lessons.

  • Barbara Diecks

    I agree, my daughter and son have walked away from the church, my daughter doesn’t believe in God even though she was raised in a Catholic home and school. It breaks my heart but each day I pray to God, I pray to Mary to intercede, I pray to St. Joseph for all my family to find a strong faith, to love and praise God. I will add St. Monica to my list. It breaks my heart but I have to step back and let God do the interceding for me. I will pray for each of your families if you will include my family in your prayers – thank you

  • Maureen Gomes

    I pray for all who have gone astray& those none believers one day will return too God,for to realize with out Him & faith we truly have nothing,i too have gone astray.No i never lost my faith in God & His teachings but from time to time Pray & going to Mass i found myself putting Our lord God on the back burner.So sorry for my lazy & selfish ways.I pray all will not do as i have done.I’m home & happy now.God Bless All

  • Maureen Gomes

    Sort by best all comments are special.God Bless

  • Sheila Trapp

    Yes, I have been struggling with my daughter, who is a freshman at college, born and raised Catholic, and just recently went through becoming baptized with the Mormon faith. My heart is broken. She’s following this path because of a boy we believe, but her dad and I are so disappointed. I seem to be the one having the hardest time with it. After many conversations, tears, and heavy burden feelings, we haven’t been able to change her thinking, to understanding this is not Christianity, being Mormon is not the same God. My husband and I are continuing to pray, and trust God’s timing, as we feel this is going to be her journey, and she will eventually come back to her family faith, but it’s going to be her journey, and God’s timing. I’m praying that I can let it go, and let God guide, but I’m truly having so much stress and struggle with this.

  • Cathy Brousseau Vieira

    I was a middle school math teacher for 7 years. I used to see the potential in all of my students, and would try to be as helpful and encouraging to them as I could. There were these students that were integrated into our classroom that were at-risk of dropping out. One of them was a tough-on-the-outside, but oh-so-smart young lady. I could tell that she wanted to do well, but was resisting due to peer pressure. If only she could have seen how much of a difference she could have made in her life by choosing a different path.

  • Annette Butler

    ABSOLUTELY! For years and years, I battled with my sister and her son who were both on wayward paths, trying to lead them back to church, or even just lead them toward living respectable lives away from addictions, etc. I became so consumed with this and frustrated at failing, that I let it affect my own family life as well as my health. In trying to better them, I was so determined to “fix” them, that I became blinded to the burden I allowed it to truly create in my own life. Finally, one day, God opened my eyes with the thought that maybe it wasn’t mine to do. I was able to “Let Go and Let God”, and there was such an enormous weight lifted from me! I’m still in the process of getting back to good health in mind, body & spirit. God is awesome!

  • Pete OBrien

    My wife’s maternal Grandma died 15 years ago. They were extremely close and Grandma was her rock of support.

    12 years ago my wife’s mother died. There had been abuse but wife always wanted her love. It came late as a sort of joint enablement.

    My wife’s grief overwhelms her life yet nothing I can do or have done or said has brought her any solice.

    I want her peace and solice much more than she seems to want it.

    ???

  • Danny Centurioni

    Glad to see that Dynamic Catholic is preparing an RCIA series.
    Most of my training came from The North American Forum on The Catechumenate, which is now defunct. The Beginnings and Beyond tract was a one week intense training and an actual living out the entire RCIA process, from the Pre-Catecumenate to Mystagogy and beyond.
    I don’t know of any other organizations out there that currently offer this type of hands on training.
    My prayers will be with Dominick and DC as they move forward in putting together their version of one of the most beautiful rites of our Church.

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